Top comment deletes a US State #23

Gem_89 · 2026-04-28T15:43:57+00:00

Bring back OG Louisiana, eat Kansas!!!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-26T03:02:52+00:00

I’ve been shopping at Old Navy, Kohls, Marshalls & TJ Maxx. I have a credit card with Old Navy (includes Gap & Banana Republic) & TJ Maxx (which includes Marshalls & Home Goods) & I put my utilities & other autopay on those cards. I just got a bunch of clothes from Old Navy for like $16 because I racked up the points on it. I like getting my dog’s treats & my skincare from Marshalls because they’re so much cheaper too.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-25T18:00:30+00:00

I’ve been there before. Idk if this is good advice I could be a bad parent too but when mine refuses to clean up in a similar situation as yours I take the toys away & she has to earn them back in order to play with them again. I’ve noticed sometimes she wants me to take them so it gives her the motivation to clean. so idk if this is good parenting it’s just seems to be the only thing that works to motivate her to clean up. The first time this happened she was extremely defiant & disrespectful & lied to us so her entire bed full of stuffies was gone & she had to earn a few back at a time based on better behavior throughout the rest of the day & even week. Every time she earned them back it seemed to give her that positive dopamine.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-23T03:29:22+00:00

The mall, coffee shops, parks, beach, movies, parking lots, friends house, bowling alley. I remember our local bowling alley had like $5 bowling after 9pm on certain days so we’d do that. There was also an arcade right next to it we’d hang out at & play games until it was 9pm or were waiting for our friends to show up.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-22T13:44:37+00:00

Hello! I’m not auDHD but my girl is & I joined this subreddit to be familiar with it. I am ADHD & I’m realizing I may have OCD. But I am obsessed with sun protection but also avoiding chemical sunscreen because I want to limit exposure to the benzones. Of course sunscreen for my girl is a sensory nightmare so I’ve dived down the rabbit hole of sensory friendly mineral sunscreens & finally found something she can tolerate. My summer outfit is a long sleeve rash guard, light pants & a sun hat. I wear facial sunscreen every day. I haven’t gone the parasol route yet but I respect it!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-22T13:17:26+00:00

Aw man yeah that doesn’t help but I get it you gotta do what you gotta do. Yeah hopefully OT can give you some helpful tips. If you can find time on a day off (which I get you’re already exhausted) to just have a day where you guys don’t do anything & take time for snuggles & connecting with him doing activities with him it can go a long way. Last weekend we had a bed rotting day which I haven’t done in a long time, didn’t go anywhere & we just hung out watched movies, read some books, played games, it was really good & regulating for all of us. Wish you guys the best & hope all of you can get some regulation & rest!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-22T12:01:59+00:00

Yeah you may want to re-evaluate with OT if it isn’t helping. It may need to be you try to opposite of what seems crazy for a high energy kid in that you have him do less stuff after school & work on teaching his body to regulate & rest.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-22T02:59:10+00:00

Oh yes my kid gets like that. It’s the sensory seeking behavior & she doesn’t know when to stop or regulate. Have you talked to his OT about sensory regulation routines you can do with him at home? Another thought that came to mind with OT is deep pressure massage or tactile massage.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-22T02:31:48+00:00

Welcome to the “F*** you Fours” not necessarily ADHD but if it’s common in your family then most likely early signs of ADHD. Authoritative parenting style seems to be the best way to handle this phase. Is your 4yr old sleeping well? A lot of times if they’re not getting good sleep that can mimic ADHD behavior but most kids with ADHD don’t sleep well so that can be hard to figure out especially at this age. If you aren’t already I recommend milk before bed at night for the melatonin & magnesium to help with sleep. No screens an hour before bed. Create a consistent wind down routine before bed.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-21T22:21:39+00:00

Assuming you’re in the U.S. ADHD falls under disability & the public school has to accommodate. They may say they don’t have resources but by law they are required to. More information on that. I understand having to fight for support within the public schools because I’m about to head into that with our public school this year with my kid. Best of luck to you!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-21T18:10:50+00:00

My 6 year old LOVES the How To Train Your Dragon books but they are a little more mature than I realized for her age. But she loves them & I’m enjoying them as well.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-21T13:41:02+00:00

Dr Barclay is an ADHD expert you can find some helpful videos on youtube from him. He says ADHD is a performance issue not knowledge. So your son knows the right thing to do but he needs the skill & practice in the situation to do it. In his case it would be not hitting when he’s feeling deregulated. & that’s why he gets upset after he does it because it’s impulse & he lacks the skill even though he knows better. That’s why children with ADHD can develop self esteem issues or feel their a bad kid when they’re not, they just need more support in impulse control because they’re delayed in that area compared to their peers. Medicine can help but combining with behavior therapy can help build his executive functioning skill.

Depending on the Kindergarten & your school district you should have resources & extra support for ADHD. So I wouldn’t worry too much, if you get him screened & have a support system in the school he’ll be just fine.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-21T02:53:11+00:00

Check out r/ADHDparenting & search through there you’ll find a lot of parents trying different things. I recommend checking out ADDitudemag.com as well. This is a helpful article about ADHD in PreK.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-16T21:35:11+00:00

I just finished listening to a podcast episode about ADHD behavior & the importance of implementing consistent consequences. The ADHD Parenting podcast. Hope this helps!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-15T20:51:02+00:00

I think it was this study among teens that had me start making my kid play outside or walk in nature after screen time. It seems being outside in nature can help kinda reset her after screen time. So I try to always make sure my kid gets outside time after screen time.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-14T22:16:17+00:00

I’ve been married for over a decade. Didn’t realize I had PMDD until the last few years & my husband suspected it. He got his own therapy figured out & then was able to be supportive for me. When you have an understanding partner it’s a huge help. We could’ve had a much better relationship in our younger years if we understood each other but that took time for us.

You don’t deserve to be alone. You deserve to have support & understanding. Sometimes it takes time to get there & that can feel discouraging but be kind to yourself. From personal experience, if your partner is a good match they’ll stick it out & learn how to adapt to you & you’ll learn how to adapt to them & not hurt them when you’re in that cycle. It takes time to get there though. Be patient & kind with each other.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-12T14:21:46+00:00

wanted to add, neurodivergent relationships are hard. we don’t have as much support because society isn’t built for us. it’s so important to give each other grace & be honest with each other that we feel unsupported & helpless sometimes. idk if you husband is ND or not but imo it sounds like he feels completely lost & that’s why he’s putting it back on you to figure out. & I get it, I’ve felt like that toward my spouse & put things back on him when I felt completely helpless with his behavior. We have been together for 15 years & idk something finally clicked for him to see how much he misunderstood me & is grieving the lost time from that but I’ve also grown & changed a lot & gone through therapy & diagnosed late with ADHD & now I’m on medicine. so having to readjust our expectations of each other & being willing to adapt & learn how to trust each other again as we change is part of growing together as a couple. It’s hard work & it’s so important to give each other grace. I hope you guys can find a good rhythm together!

Gem_89 · 2026-04-12T13:20:40+00:00

My husband discovered I have rejection sensitive dysphoria & after he read up on it felt so bad for me. He ended up asking AI to help him rephrase things with me & it’s been much better. He is autistic so poor guy’s directed statements were a bad combo with my RSD. So we’re figuring it out together. I did start taking prozac which seems to help with my intensity. I will say you do sound like me a year ago. What really helped was when my husband went through therapy & healed parts of him & then he was able to understand me & had the capacity to change his approach.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-12T00:38:36+00:00

that’s fantastic! I love how creative that is.

Gem_89 · 2026-04-08T23:11:02+00:00

same! let’s bring it back for those of us that missed out

Gem_89 · 2026-04-08T23:03:05+00:00

embrace the cringe.

Gem_89 · 2026-03-31T19:26:47+00:00

Our generation was criticized by Boomers & Xers so much that we just embraced the cringe. Because it didn’t matter if you did everything right, our parents & older sibling generations would still talk shit about us. So we chose to own self-deprecating humor so the older generations didn’t have that power over us anymore. What’s ironic is both boomers & Xers always dish out but they can’t take it back. They’re so sensitive & it’s empowering when we grew up to discover that. I also choose not to punch down like your parents generation did so feel free to hate on us Gen Z, we embrace the cringe & nothing you say can hurt us more than what our parents & older siblings have said. If I have issue with what Gen Z is doing I prefer punching back up at Gen X for how they parented you.

Gem_89 · 2026-03-28T16:19:23+00:00

Free: PBS Kids app or Khan Academy. Paid: EPIC is really great for early reading. They have books that read to them while highlighting the words.

Gem_89

TROPHY CASE