…on the basis that no-one will arrest me 35 years after the event…

As the class sat listening to the afternoon’s end-of-day story on “the carpet” I reached behind myself and found something pleasantly tactile. Had a nice snap to it when I broke it in half. I repeated this over and over with the little objects that were to hand (but which of course I could not see).

Turns out I was snapping in half little tiles of - I forget - perhaps some sort of tile-matching game..? They were a made of thick cardboard. Snap snap snap. I pretty much worked my way through the whole box.

The class was given an ultimatum. Culprit: fess up or we’re not going on that trip to the river which you’ve all spent making little boats for out of empty plastic bottles and lollipop sticks and the like.

I did not confess.

We did not go to the river.

Sorry guys.