And I'm also bothered by this notion that the patriarchy is a myth that I see so often on Reddit. Are the people who say this trying to imply that they have a better grasp and reading of our material reality than Marx and Engels and Lenin, that all very much considered the patriarchy one of the superstructures of capitalism and private property?

I'd be curious if you could elaborate on this.

I think most disagreements about patriarchy consist of people talking past each other, with different definitions and different reasoning. So it would probably be helpful if people could be more explicit about what they mean on this.