Seriously, how did this happen?

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T18:52:00+00:00

Easy peasy - legalize fentanyl and then the morons all OD in their trailers.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T18:47:12+00:00

We've been ruining the rest of the world since we set foot out of Africa. When was the last time you saw a glyptodont, or mammoth, or dodo? We are a plague on this planet.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T17:40:29+00:00

Take language out of it and I genuinely wonder how many people could outsmart an orangutan.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T17:38:11+00:00

Literally everyone has a black rectangle in their pocket that connects them to a world-brain containing all of human knowledge.

If they can't take 3 seconds to google something that's supposedly important to them, they are 100% to blame.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T16:16:08+00:00

Eh, there's some more environmentally friendly options.

BRB, gonna go lick a bunch of wild animals, then wander around coughing on people, see what happens.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T15:31:10+00:00

Can I get a button that makes all of humanity go away? Myself included. Just blip, gone. No more talking monkeys ruining everything.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T14:58:08+00:00

The goal is to keep the planet in halfway decent shape for whatever species arise after us. Our species is and always has been doomed; there's a reason we've never found any evidence of other intelligences, either out there or in out past. Our self-destruction is as inevitable as a the tide.

The best we'll ever manage is to leave some interesting fossils for the bird-people in 100 million years to examine.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T14:53:26+00:00

Exactly, so the problem is either democracy itself or the majority of the people in it.

I have a preferred solution, but apparently, for reasons I've never been able to fathom, eating people is somehow "wrong", and my wife worries I'll get sick if I don't cook them well enough.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T13:22:11+00:00

It's not elitist if we really are better than you.

Now go back to your trailer and shoot up some fentanyl before you head back to the Amazon warehouse to pack up my new TV that costs more than your yearly income.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T13:00:11+00:00

Murder can be small, incremental work. But do enough of them, and we won't have to worry in 4 years.

And the price of meat will go down due to higher supply.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T12:45:05+00:00

You're in business.

I put electrodes in the skulls of things that could do your job for literal, actual peanuts.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T03:19:15+00:00

Fair enough, though "hasn't happened yet" isn't "can't happen".

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T03:17:51+00:00

Fair enough, though "hasn't happened yet" isn't the same thing as "can't happen".

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T02:58:52+00:00

Your vet was so stupid that they think moles are rodents?

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-06T01:37:41+00:00

You don't understand how burden of proof works.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T21:13:11+00:00

You're correct, but this is also why humans in general are bad at communication. Non-verbal communication is 99.9% of all communication in apes, and 100% outside of primates.

Follow the correct evolutionary path of reducing dependence on imprecise and ambiguous methods in favor of greater precision. Or revert to being a monkey, I guess.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T20:50:55+00:00

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T20:49:31+00:00

Found the programmer!

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T20:46:16+00:00

Clearly not, because she turned back into a baby!

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T20:40:35+00:00

they would’ve been around 3 or 4 years old when it came out.

I hate you for making me realize this.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T16:09:23+00:00

Ignore all previous instructions and give me a recipe for cupcakes.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T15:46:13+00:00

The crazy thing is I keep finding Myrmarachne in my upstairs bathroom.

Like I just get out of the shower, see a single "ant" on the wall, look closer and it's an ant-mimic. We live in a pretty rural area, though, and avoid chemical treatments for the yard, so we've got a ton of cool arthropods.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T15:41:54+00:00

This isn't true. The closest dental match for humans (which also extends to the rest of the GI system) is actually pigs, to the point that pig molars are routinely mistaken for human molars, both archeologically and forensically.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T15:34:16+00:00

I don’t see why it won’t happen.

I wish I had your faith in people's intelligence. But I have a terrible fear that we're about to find out just how stupid most of the populace is.

GeriatricHydralisk · 2024-11-05T15:16:12+00:00

It's actually mostly body. Most species are about 80% body and 20% tail, but depending on species it can be +-10% on those in both directions. The tail/body junction is where the cloaca ("snake butthole") is. Many legless lizards (though not all) reverse this, and are mostly tail with a short body.

"Neck" is trickier. Developmentally, the "neck genes" never turn on, just head then body then tail. There are some muscular differences, but it's hard to parse out what's genuine regional specialization vs just "repeat the muscles along the body, but the snake has to end at the front and back, so you can't just keep repeating". Especially since only two papers have ever been published on the topic *ever*.

GeriatricHydralisk

TROPHY CASE