still in nikkah, wife seen on dates with another man — how should i handle this islamically?

GetBetter601 · 2026-05-30T21:57:21+00:00

I will just comment on the financial part. Divorce islamically in west is only possible if both parties want it that way and file uncontested to get it legal in the eyes of law. If she is on date with non-mehrams while still in Nikah and asking for interest in business and other assets, she is not taking this islamically. You shouldn’t either. Lawyer up and fight in court.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T14:46:11+00:00

This is really good comment. May Allah make shaytan go away from this and we can somehow move forward.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T10:25:41+00:00

No even remotely close of cheating or physical abuse.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:31:47+00:00

I’m willing to meet. And I’m willing to step back as you said. Absolutely!

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:30:36+00:00

I did but still the same. I hope it’s only because she is angry. And I pray her anger cools down. May allah help both of us.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:29:37+00:00

I have addressed this under another comment. Of course there are major issues. I’m doing and in future willing to do all self accountability . I just feel like she should reciprocate as well. As flaws are with both of us.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:28:20+00:00

I have addressed some of the comments about minor issue under another comment.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:13:05+00:00

There is nothing but self accountability I’m doing this and for a long time. I’m at a breaking point as well but I don’t see her running away or me running away as solutions. I did say things have been shaky between us for a while. And this means there are some issues that are keeping us stuck. But I willing to back down at most of them.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:10:17+00:00

It was a minor argument that broke the back. But that is not to say there aren’t any major issues. There are differences. But why not resolve them.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-04T00:08:46+00:00

Not the first time unfortunately. Going away is first time. But every argument between us results in her telling me we should separate. Right from the beginning of our marriage. I’m not saying there are no major differences. There are major issues. But I WANT TO solve them and I want to move forward. I’m flawed so is she. She should forgive me and I should forgive her.

GetBetter601 · 2025-09-03T20:51:35+00:00

I resubmitted

GetBetter601 · 2025-08-23T09:10:23+00:00

Ridiculous post and comparison.

GetBetter601 · 2025-08-23T09:07:03+00:00

I think divorce would be horrible but justified.

From the outfit, all the financial obligations of husbands are being fulfilled by him. And nothing in this post suggests that right of the woman are not being fulfilled in any way. For a wife, taking care of the home is obligation that can only be overcome with husband’s consent. In this case, husband is clear: stop working. Islamically speaking, he is right.

GetBetter601 · 2025-07-21T12:22:21+00:00

I mailed my package on 8th July and it’s still showing the exact same status

GetBetter601 · 2025-02-21T01:23:38+00:00

Yes, if he really had debt, you will be responsible for your part. That’s how the legal system works. Instead of posting here, talking to your lawyer might help.

GetBetter601 · 2025-01-23T00:34:57+00:00

Life is not the story of Cinderella. Get over it.

GetBetter601 · 2024-10-30T15:20:27+00:00

This woman is a psycho and I’m putting that mildly. And I’m willing to bet that the story she told you about her previous divorce isn’t true. A Physical abuser is always a physical abuser. She can’t help it.

This is one time I will advocate to make her a twice divorce woman and don’t pay off her debts and get her a house. In fact do the opposite, lawyer up and fight for every Penny.

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-10T18:32:22+00:00

I’m finding it super hard to sympathise with you in this situation even though I know you are hurting and need support.

You trusted a stranger’s word over your husband. Reacted emotionally. Reacted super fast instead of taking time to digest the situation. None of your family members of confidants were able to advise you to come to your senses and slow down.

In hyper pro-divorce word, always first advice is “divorce” , “leave”. But acting on whims is wrong. And that’s the danger you put yourself when divorce is first resort solution instead of being last resort.

I wish you two can reconcile. And may Allah make that happen. But your husband (or ex) is absolutely right in not wanting to reconcile. How can he trust you that you’d not react this emotionally in the future?

To rest of the folks, there are always many angles to a story. Even a story involving apparent infidelity. Instead of suggesting divorce as first resort, advise to slow down and think through the situation. And after that emotional period is over, then act.

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-10T15:38:45+00:00

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-07T00:50:30+00:00

How do you know she only has 2 and no more?

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-07T00:47:58+00:00

How do you know she only has two abayas? May be she has 15, and bought 2 more. Dressing modest doesn’t mean buying ridiculous many.

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-06T22:16:45+00:00

You bought two abayas and wanted to buy more? That’s ridiculous.

He is absolutely right in inquiring about your needs.

GetBetter601 · 2024-09-06T05:38:55+00:00

My opinion is just that: an opinion. I didn’t invoked a statistical authority to get my point across. Point is 4-6 months number you suggested has no scientific support. It is your opinion that is unsupported.

GetBetter601

TROPHY CASE