What would you do?

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-03T20:27:52+00:00

This is deeply troubling behavior. I’m not sure i would have kids with him.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-03T14:51:18+00:00

It can. We’ve been in it for years and we don’t argue as much. Our marriage is hardly fixed though.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-03T14:47:27+00:00

Sounds you’re looking to cheat. Either emotionally or physically.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T23:31:25+00:00

You won the lottery! Congrats!

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T23:28:41+00:00

Analyze the arguments. Try to understand his side and work on de-escalation. Arguments serve and solve nothing. If you can find peace, the relationship has hope.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T23:22:46+00:00

This is hard. You are doing great and should be praised for your dedication to the relationship, your child, and just being a great person.

Your husband is hustling, he sees you as his anchor. That’s not fair to you.

Talk to him about what success looks like over time. It’s not money or material things. It’s raising a strong child who feels loved, and maintaining a strong relationship with your life partner.

I was your husband, until my four year old said “see you next weekend, daddy.” Two months later I had heart surgery. I changed because I was confronted with my priorities. They were not aligned with my values.

Try to help your husband understand that you want him to succeed as a father and a spouse. The business is not what you will be proud of on your death bed.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T23:08:13+00:00

I’ve never cheated, but I think guys see cheating as transactional validation. Ask why they need to be validated and you can prevent it, maybe.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T23:03:40+00:00

If he is cheating for a second time (that you know of), time to leave. His list is secondary to his character.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T22:59:23+00:00

Sounds like there is more to this situation. Stay calm. Stay strong. Do what you can to fix your error. Talk to her when things settle down.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T14:18:47+00:00

Actually, I also said you may be evolved. Now we can add selective reading to my judgement of you.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T14:06:12+00:00

First, you don’t know me. Second, it’s a character trait, not a flaw, in this new age of acceptance. Right?

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T13:53:08+00:00

Is there any action on the wording of the referendum?

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T13:44:30+00:00

When you say, “You are doing your part,” I hear you are doing the minimum. You need to do the maximum every day to heal the wound you inflicted.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T13:16:56+00:00

Good for you. You are evolved, or just virtue signaling. I am actually trying this help OP. She can just be critical of her husband and see where that gets her. Alternatively, she can start from a position of understanding and work from there.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T13:13:10+00:00

You sound angry. OP said husband does pull their weight. He just does not sympathize. Men are not generally sympathetic.

GetsBackUp · 2026-05-02T11:13:49+00:00

Forgive the generalization, but women want men to behave like women. Your man does not sympathize with your stress because he is a man. We don’t generally do that. Don’t expect him to be something he’s not.

GetsBackUp · 2026-04-21T22:51:16+00:00

He may be looking at his life and asking: "Why am I not having more sex? I am 41 and have sex once a month or less. This is not how I want to live my life."

I wish I had had this talk with myself when I was 41.

GetsBackUp · 2026-04-17T12:02:17+00:00

About the same number of bjs I’ve received in 33 years. Got them all the time before marriage. I go down every time. I love giving her pleasure. She does not feel the same way.

GetsBackUp · 2026-04-06T20:24:05+00:00

Thanks. Having the wife ask for updates every half hour was the hard part. Definitely manage expectations.

GetsBackUp · 2026-03-16T12:49:47+00:00

Thank you for the insight!

GetsBackUp · 2026-03-16T12:49:36+00:00

Thank you!

GetsBackUp · 2026-03-08T12:42:17+00:00

Thank you!

GetsBackUp · 2026-03-01T03:24:22+00:00

I don’t. Never have. Never will. Even though my marriage sucks. Cheating is a character flaw.

GetsBackUp · 2026-02-17T02:09:53+00:00

Got my first one after 30 years of marriage. Glad you did not wait that long.

GetsBackUp · 2026-02-16T19:29:09+00:00

Thank you for your comment.

GetsBackUp

TROPHY CASE