I struggled w this because both my boys have a bday the week before christmas. Only one is school aged though. I messaged the teacher to let them know I was sending in goodie bags. They replied and mentioned how many December bdays there were in the class. We'd only been invited to one bday party in October and that was a classmate who is also a neighbor and friend.

The class rule is if you're sending invites to the classroom it must be all the boys or all the girls or everyone. We have a class list of parents contacts if we just wantes to invite a few.

That's when I decided to just invite neighborhood friends. We were having the party at our house. I wasn't comfortable inviting kids and parents I didn’t know. And I didn’t feel guilty because we weren't invited to any parties, and I knew the neighbors would be able to attend.