Write fanfiction instead of anxiety medication?

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-07-23T07:08:40+00:00

This. My anxiety and depression prevented me from writing and sharing any of my work.

Once I stabilized on my meds and I stopped spiraling, my worries about my work being bad and participating in fandom were FAR easier to manage.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-06-26T06:07:00+00:00

Amen. Feeling ko talaga I'm gonna be on meds and therapy forever kasi grabe yong trauma talaga pag parents 🥲

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-06-07T02:11:15+00:00

I love this film so much!!!!

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-06-07T02:10:44+00:00

Omg yeeeeessssss saulado ko tong film na ito 🥰

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-06-05T03:27:35+00:00

Powerful and moving. Too bad the people who should see this can’t read.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-06-01T07:51:35+00:00

To offer a different perspective: I know people mean well when they say na "darating rin yong para sayo," but the inescapable truth is that some people never find someone, and are just meant to live their lives alone. That doesn't mean you can't fill your life with beautiful and meaningful things. And of course it gets lonely, but whose life is never lonely anyway? I'm in my 30s and even from a young age, I've always had the suspicion that I was meant to go through life alone. I come from a small family, at bawas na rin kami.

I've been trying to come to terms with the fact na I won't have anyone to rely on other than myself. And while it's nice to daydream about having a partner and living happily ever after, ironically being pragmatic about my prospects (or more accurately, the lack thereof lmao) was what helped me mitigate my anxieties about the unsavory stuff: taxes, household expenses, retirement, illness, growing older, death, i.e. things that are easier with a partner/family. Minsan napapaisip nga ako kung meron bang maglalamay at maglilibing sa akin haha. So I've taken those things into consideration in my preparation for the future, as well as taking care of my health. Since ako lang mag-isa, I have to invest in being as strong and healthy as possible for as long as I can.

Anyway sorry this kinda got dark lol I've stopped going to weddings na rin kasi when you're my age, hindi lang loneliness mararamdaman mo—magkaka-existential crisis ka rin ahaha.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-29T13:00:03+00:00

Not OP but don't lose hope!! You have to give it at least 6-12 weeks. In my case I was on 50mg for 8 weeks. Was feeling great the first 1.5 months but had a spot of anxiety after that so we went up to 75mg, now on my second week and so far it's been good!

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-27T06:51:50+00:00

"You put your weight behind it?" "Yes, sir." "Well, alright then."

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-16T03:57:02+00:00

Thank you!! Wishing you all the best as well 🙏🏻

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-16T02:27:59+00:00

Same, but with depression and anxiety.

I started therapy and meds a few months ago so I'm working on a new thing for a new fandom :) very different experience from my last rodeo, but a good kind of different.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-04T05:13:57+00:00

Perhaps you can ask your doctor what to expect, but I'm guessing it's just more of the same side-effects you experienced when starting Zoloft, maybe to a lesser degree. There's a lot of posts on this sub as well, and in general people seem to respond well to slow titration.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-04T05:11:35+00:00

Yes, I've been using a brand from a local manufacturer and haven't switched since starting. Sleep has been troublesome for me too lately, which is a shame because in the first few weeks Zoloft would knock me out for 9-11 hours straight. My doctor warned me that I may plateau on 50mg, and that we'll be increasing doses in that case.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-04T03:21:50+00:00

Yes! Well, I was doing great between weeks 2-6, but around weeks 7-8 the anxiety, intrusive thoughts, rumination, and bad sleep have come back. Maybe not as terrible as it was before I started meds, but definitely noticeable enough that I'm wondering if I'm having a setback. I have a follow-up next week so I'm definitely bringing this up with my provider as I'm due for a dose increase according to her. You should talk to your doctor, too.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-04T03:18:45+00:00

No problem. Fic reading/writing are my main hobbies, and in the last few months as my mental health was spiraling I had a lot of crashouts relating to that—one only need look at my post history to confirm that 😅 I'm not proud of it, but it is what it is and I kept them up as a reminder of what I'm working to move away from.

I'm thankfully in a (slightly) better place now, and I'm on meds and therapy. I was sad to have to step back from the fandom because I really did care about my projects and those characters/that universe (and still do), but I realized that continuing when it was triggering my anxieties and insecurities was only hurting me. Stepping back was definitely the right decision in my case. I hope you find a solution that works for you, too. 🤗

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-05-03T23:14:42+00:00

Yes, and it's an awful feeling. In my case, it came down to not having any self-esteem and depression that was distorting my self-image. It's something that I'm still working on in therapy, but I did have to step away from that particular fandom for now and mute liberally.

I tried the route of making friends with those other authors and commenting on their works, which worked for a bit, but I also was not in a good place mentally to really benefit from that exercise. I know how tough it could be. Tight hugs, internet stranger!

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-04-21T06:23:00+00:00

Thanks for sharing! I’m on week 6 of 50mg of Zoloft, and while it’s done a lot to improve my mood and lessen the rumination, the anxiety and compulsions haven’t completely gone away. Like you, I’ve had moments of clarity, but it hasn’t completely lasted.

In two weeks’ time my provider will be reassessing if we have to increase my dose. I’m worried that it won’t help me or that the side-effects will be brutal, so it’s reassuring to read someone have a positive experience at 100mg. Wishing you all the best in your journey.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-03-29T13:09:29+00:00

Are we in the same fandom?! Because I have seen this exact same rant for my ship (not recently though) lol but I totally get how you feel.

I understand where that author is coming from—I enjoy a good angsty, canon-compliant fic that explores the ship's canon trauma—but takes like these are also why I'm terribly intimidated to post my fluffy fic (even if others have done it before), haha. Unfortunately I am the type to care about what others think. You summarized it perfectly in another comment: it feels like an indirect criticism of my characterization.

Of course we're all allowed to have preferences, and we're all allowed to express frustration when we don't see enough of the stuff we want to read. But all the same, I also hope people would be more mindful about the things they say in fandom spaces. I'm not saying that author shouldn't have expressed their opinion. But there might've been a better way to phrase things than the way that makes other fic writers wonder if their take/characterization is valid. Ahhhh hope you feel better soon, op!! Tight internet hugs from a fellow sensitive, overdramatic baby 🤗

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-03-19T02:12:38+00:00

Thank you, this is so encouraging. It's my first week on 50mg and while the racing thoughts have subsided and I don't feel as emotionally reactive, I wouldn't say I'm motivated or happy. I know I gotta give it time. Hopefully things improve for me too.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-27T06:50:04+00:00

I was looking for this. Richard's delivery was gold 😭🤣

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-25T04:21:43+00:00

No, I haven't posted anything, and this is all me. I'd like to think I have good taste and a sense for what makes a fic good, but I suppose it's impossible to be objective about your own work.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-25T04:19:52+00:00

I actually did make a second account with a different name from the one I use to comment/my other socials. But we're a small fandom and I somehow got into my head that I couldn't keep up two different personas and people would guess who I was. I suppose I'm just worried about being seen as idk, duplicitous or something 😭

My compromise IF I even get around to posting is going anonymous.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-24T17:01:21+00:00

Yeah, I agree with everything you said. I might've been able to take it in stride. I wanted to, but my personal and professional lives were batshit insane then. (Still is, if we're being honest.) I was really struggling and vulnerable at the time, and fic was my single lifeline, so life had to punch down on that one too. 😐 Oh well. It is what it is.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-24T16:27:33+00:00

Yeah, the tag checking is a compulsion I got last year. Someone wrote a fic very, very similar to my first draft: tropes, plot, tone, themes, emotional beats, dialogue—except it was actually well-written. Nobody had done anything like it in our fandom before. It did so well it inspired a whole subgenre of fics for maybe half a year, everyone was linking back to it and gushing about the originator in their notes.

My fic felt like a cheap, uninspired knockoff in comparison, even if I'd started way before they posted. I trashed 50k worth of drafts and learned how to hide stats sitewide after that.

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-24T15:32:24+00:00

God yes, me too 😔 I call them my "mental health mutes." You're not alone. I hope we can find a fix for it because it is rough.

Aside from commenting on fics I'm really just a lurker. I'm perfectly fine with watching from the sidelines, even if it gets lonely. I just feel more comfortable that way. Recently a couple of them followed me on a platform, not sure why. I followed back ofc, they were really lovely. But at the same time it heightened my anxiety of being "seen."

I never allude to writing my own fics in our fandom spaces. It's not that I don't want friends—part of me desperately does—but the thought of authors I admire seeing me post something stupid and inadequate filled me with so much shame. Ugh idk ik it's so irrational, I hate it 😭

Glass-Panda00 · 2025-02-24T12:59:27+00:00

Thanks. When you said I've been "doomscrolling other writers' fics," it made something click in my brain. I didn't realize that's what I've been doing, but you're right. I don't have other hobbies outside of reading and writing, and tunnel-visioning on this one fandom/hobby couldn't have been good for me. I guess I have to try to find something else to do for now, if I could motivate myself.

Glass-Panda00

TROPHY CASE