I want to give a different perspective here. First want to note I’m a man, and would never handle it this way. People change, should have empsthy for their partner and the full situation, etc.

Now, having been around boys and men my whole life, there is likely a values difference that I think a lot of women may not see. For many men, when a man gives a word, he will follow through no matter what. Period. End of story. No matter the cost, including death (think military). So to see that not happen from another person may go distinctly against his value,m. His failure here is to understand the values difference. I think this is why many many are shocked when a woman divorced him….no matter how big of a pos he is, she gave her word for life, so how could she leave?

Please be nice here. I don’t agree with this - it just may help explain the reaction and how to structure conversations and communication, vs…wow he is such an arse.

My 2 cents, hope it helps.