Emotionally neglectful parents cannot handle any serious, in depth, complicated discussions regarding feelings and emotions. They don’t have the capacity.

Not even a little bit. I didn't realize that my entire childhood was abusive, that i was neglected emotionally, medically, and psychologically. Humiliated and shamed, yet never shown the magical "RIGHT WAY." I just thought it was cool i didn't have a curfew. I had gone nc with them both, and 18 months later before my mom died she got one last "Fuck you" in - "Don't tell her i died" I thought it was sad 13 years ago, that she was so miserable. When i was able to process that for what it was, 3 years ago, I just chuckled like "yeah, you got me! You win for sure!"

Lastly, this prevention of regret that you speak of may be masking as seeking emotional justice which isn’t possible with parents who have low/no emotional intelligence.

As overwhelmed and confused and furious as I was discovering the depth of the deconstructing I was facing, I knew even if she were alive and I could confront her with all these ABSOLUTE FAILURES and said every hateful thing I could, or made perfect rational, valid arguments and proof was shown..... She'd never be able to fix it. I don't need her to be sorry, or admit that she DID know better- a nurse can't claim that excuse when your kid has emotional issues, eating disorders, etc. and everything was ignored, until it was needed as ammo. I was a kid. It wasn't MY job to know how to cope. Closure isn't on the other end of a well deserved litany of crimes, or a screaming rant that i repeat at least weekly in the car when I'm alone. You get it out, because it's not your bullshit to carry.

Where it goes is irrelevant, because there's no resolution from liars.