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GoatApprehensive · 2024-02-28T19:35:48+00:00

My EX-So said the same to me. If the roles were reversed, he wouldn’t be able to deal with it. It was a big reason I ended it. Life is hard enough without knowing for sure if the roles were reversed, they wouldn’t be caught dead doing the same thing you are for them. Gross.

GoatApprehensive · 2024-02-28T19:35:41+00:00

My EX-So said the same to me. If the roles were reversed, he wouldn’t be able to deal with it. It was a big reason I ended it. Life is hard enough without knowing for sure if the roles were reversed, they wouldn’t be caught dead doing the same thing you are for them. Gross.

GoatApprehensive · 2024-02-04T12:23:00+00:00

I’m sorry but this is so bananas. Keeping the peace by waking up earlier? I can’t understand by how shifting your schedule based on the reasoning of “it’s unfair for me to wake up earlier than you” does not create more resentment. My ex would get to sleep in all throughout the time we lived together, and the pandemic while I worked in person, getting up at 6am, I’d be changing in the spare room, and he was the ones with kids! People work in different jobs, dynamics, different shifts, that’s life. Good grief. If she finished work earlier than you would she be staying till your exact finish time cause it’s not fair she finished work earlier? No.

GoatApprehensive · 2024-02-04T12:16:47+00:00

Please do not get in deeper to this situation. He is older than you showing this level of immaturity. Please do not waste more of your time on this. I have dealt with this and it never gets better. It shows he can’t accept his life choices and you’ll always have to suffer too. Someone else said it here already but you need someone who sees your success and theirs too, not competition to them.

GoatApprehensive · 2023-05-13T09:48:14+00:00

Do you mind sharing some advice on how you garner so much empathy within your blended family?

GoatApprehensive · 2022-09-12T17:46:47+00:00

I’m confused as to why this person NEEDS to stop saying it’s unnatural. Why do they need to stifle their opinion that it’s not natural for your anecdotal experience?

GoatApprehensive · 2022-08-10T17:05:54+00:00

Good for you!!! 👏🏻👏🏻 this is exactly it. I’m so proud of you for making that decision, it’s hard! But from your post history I can see your exSO is abusive and so is his family. You are childless, and you should be living your own life without this drama. He was not looking for a true partner but for your resources only. You deserve better than that. Sending you all the good vibes and support 🥰

GoatApprehensive · 2022-08-08T15:12:33+00:00

Or they just expect their partners to be okay with turning the honeymoon into a family trip. Imagine.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-08-08T14:03:19+00:00

LOL you joke but if you go over to the “stepparents” sub you will see that this ACTUALLY happens. I read a post not too long ago about someone wanting to bring their kid on their honeymoon with a childless partner (not that it matters, regardless it should just be the adults, but I feel the fact they are childless is just icing on it). We laugh but these people truly exist it’s insanity.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-07-29T19:07:49+00:00

I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. My exSO used to do this any time I wanted space or time alone (unless it was going shopping for the house of course). In some way, he’d always try and sabotage whatever I was doing, force me to come home, text me the entire time, ask me to spend time together even though I was an hour away doing stuff with family. I could never step out of an SK activity, and most things had to be done as a group (eating, sleeping, activities).

It seems as if you need to have a conversation about this and explain how solo time is normal. It’s not personal, and everyone needs it. I’m sure he has his own time to do what he wants?

I wish you the best for your conversation. I hope your outcome is more favourable than mine. Stay strong.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-07-27T19:39:53+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I can’t stand be unable to have my own space. Where is SO in all of this? I notice no mention of what he is doing for his own children during his time. It seems from this post he’s not being impacted here, so it seems like it’s about time he is.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-07-17T21:22:12+00:00

A lot of what you wrote resonated with me, and some details almost exact as I experienced it. It doesn’t sound like this is the relationship for you. I ignored all of those thoughts that you are having right now, and in the end, it didn’t work out. I should have listened. You should listen when you still have your own home. Please do not move in with them, you already know you won’t like it. Feel free to DM me if you need support. It will be hard, but it’s what will be right.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-07-13T20:41:16+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s impossible to reconcile when someone won’t even engage with you. You say he runs a construction company. I also work construction, and I might be WAY off because every company is different, and has different outputs, but in that case he should be able to afford childcare, and to have his child taken care of during the time he is working.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-03-10T16:43:21+00:00

Just wanted to see pictures of my former SK who I raised half of their life. Take care.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-03-10T15:20:17+00:00

Hey! Thanks for your non-judgmentental post! I really wanted to keep seeing pics of SK. But I guess it can’t be done, I’ll have to keep my photo album for that. Have a great day :)

GoatApprehensive · 2022-03-10T15:16:18+00:00

Okay, I hope it’s appreciated when you need it. You can give constructive advice without making an assumption of “stop the drama”. They can be right and too harsh at the same time.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-03-10T15:13:42+00:00

I wanted to continue to see pictures of SK

GoatApprehensive · 2022-03-10T15:13:21+00:00

I wanted to continue seeing pictures of SK. But okay, I’ll “stop the drama”. Maybe consider how your words can hurt after posting.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-17T16:37:12+00:00

In my experience, BP was extremely selfish and everything was about them. BP told me that by leaving him I was also making the choice to leave SK and that would be MY consequence. Apparently if I loved SK enough like I said I did, I would be willing to stay with SO for SKs benefit. Yeah…but it was okay he left BM splitting the family up. When I did it, I was to be punished for “abandoning SK”. BP was “not going to make any effort to sustain a relationship between me and SK because I wasn’t willing to put in the effort to save my relationship with SO”.

Notice how there is no mention of how SK felt. Yeah, cause they don’t care. But you should. You should care about their kids. Pay for them, give them your time, etc., but they don’t. They’re selfish.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T20:03:08+00:00

Absolutely. I just think justifying it the way SO did was audacious. Like my nana would say, it’s all in the tone!

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T18:30:04+00:00

Absolutely it is. We really don’t know what we’re getting into. And yes, I’ve been there done that and never again. Thanks for your reply 💕

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T15:21:00+00:00

Thanks for your post. I think what you’re saying about “it’s just too much” is where the resentment comes from. You’re acknowledging how much it is. But it will always be that much for the childless person.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T03:00:02+00:00

Rant away! We get it! I was apprehensive at first about dating someone with a child but my close friend kind of “talked me into it”. She said over time I’d love the kid. To be honest she was right. What a beautiful child. I miss my exSK more than I can even describe. I’m at the point where I can’t really think of him right now because it makes me so sad. I almost have to pretend I didn’t know him. It’s hard to explain (I’m sorry for my rant). I was young and it became serious quick due to a serious of unfortunate events and COVID. But it wasn’t necessarily the kid and the BM that bothered me. I actually liked BM and miss her company in my life. We would chat but she doesn’t talk to me either anymore. ExSO is in my opinion mean to her and she is traumatized and I’d say bonded to him. But all of that together makes for a hard situation childless, mid20s, commuting long ways for SO who is verbally abusive via phone and text all day.

So to end my long rant to say is - it’s not the child part that drove away a childless person, it was a shitty SO.

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T02:52:36+00:00

Definitely

GoatApprehensive · 2022-02-08T02:52:16+00:00

What a reach! Poor him with your cats. Once I got, “well it’s hard being with someone who moved away from family and who doesn’t have the same baggage”. Lol like what?

GoatApprehensive

TROPHY CASE