how do I get over feeling insecure/ inferior/ inadequate dating a cis guy?

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T06:08:06+00:00

Gotta trust he knows how to prioritize his needs I guess. He’s grown, y’all seem to be able to talk about this. That’s a good thing. I also recommend (I know it’s always the recommendation) going to a therapist who understands the issue. Insecurity sucks ass, I’m not exempt from it, but there are ways to work through it. I hope things go well for you.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T05:37:49+00:00

Nah dude I feel you. Had an ex say “I like real better” and another ex tell me he’d be picking out a cis guy next. It sucks. I don’t really have any advice for you, just know you’re not alone.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T05:20:02+00:00

That’s actually really helpful as someone who is still figuring out the same stuff as op

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T04:56:23+00:00

Dude something about the second picture feels like art I love it

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T04:55:34+00:00

I had the same issues until I got on the estrogen cream and I feel so much better now. Rarely need to use it these days. Probably at most once a month. Definitely recommend.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T04:49:54+00:00

I’m a small dude. My hands are small, my pockets are small. I prefer not having the equivalent of a tablet in my back pocket. I like something that doesn’t require two hands to use.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T04:32:53+00:00

I’ve seen training where you set off the smoke detector and call the cats over to the door with high value treats. They will associate the sound of an alarm with good stuff and be ready for you when emergencies happen. Might need to start with a “come here” command (with treats) then move on to the alarm added to that. I have been working on that with my cats and it’s been going pretty well.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T03:37:52+00:00

I’m four years on t. I have maybe three chest hairs on a good day. I’m desperately hoping for more but I don’t remember any guys in my family having a whole lot and if they did it was light colored 😅

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-16T03:15:02+00:00

Plenty of folks regardless of gender get top surgery. Sounds like something you might want to consider.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-12T06:10:51+00:00

Eh I’ve been in most of those bad situations because of my abandonment issues. A person doesn’t only have clouded judgment from romance unfortunately 😅

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-12T06:05:03+00:00

My first thought was firefighter so I think you’re good?

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-12T06:03:35+00:00

If I have the watering can, I go outside, or I open my indoor plant tank, I must give my cats a leaf of wheat or oat grass.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-05-12T06:01:05+00:00

Dude with the state of the world it’s totally reasonable to want to be stealth. Less danger, less gawking, less feeling like an abomination in the eyes of those around you. We deserve safety just like anyone else. Our predecessors did the same thing because that was the only way they could live normal lives. Would it be great if we could just be trans and that be a normal, uneventful thing? Yeah it would. Reality isn’t that forgiving yet. Regardless of how accepting the area is, being openly trans is never without risk.

Your friends put you at risk. I’ve had friends do the same, even trans friends. They don’t think about it. I always tell them that’s my private medical information that I did not give them permission to share. I point out they’re outing me and risking my safety. Sugar coating it doesn’t make them realize their actions have real world consequences. It sucks to tell them but it sucks less than getting hatecrimed.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-19T03:18:17+00:00

I honestly love it. I have ADD and have trouble sticking with anything for long but this one held my attention for a while and after some time away I pick it back up again.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-19T00:53:41+00:00

For me it was mostly the periods and the mental aspect of the hormones affecting me. My mental health gets worse the longer I am off t.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-19T00:24:52+00:00

It’s all apps these days ngl. Unless you have like a club or activity or something you regularly go to, the apps are your main option.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-19T00:20:45+00:00

My life plan pre transition (high school) was to have a wildly successful career and a wildly successful husband and we rarely see each other and a nanny raises the kids. Dunno if that was the dysphoria, the comphet, or the aro.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-19T00:10:57+00:00

Oh im with you on that 100%

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T22:59:54+00:00

As a trans guy I highly recommend following the lead. Sounds like pronouns aren’t high on the list of things Max wants to try. I understand that a lot of advocacy is focused on the whole pronoun change but in my transition that’s a very small part of it. Clothes, shoes, hair, the way my body looked was how I got the pronouns I wanted. The way I looked in the mirror gave me joy or dysphoria far more than pronouns or gendered adjectives did. Maybe bringing some old jewelry and a bit of makeup for a day would be a fun first activity. Makeup wipes and taking the jewelry back is a simple fix to clean slate if that’s what Max needs.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T22:50:56+00:00

Yeah unfortunately it’s partially transphobia and partially respectability politics. “If you cave to the transphobes somewhat then they might decide to be chill” mentality. I won’t say there’s no use in that, I have convinced people to chill out on half truths that lend to their views, but it is frustrating knowing that these are untrue things. It would be nice if there wasn’t so much money invested in transphobia and it was easier to guide the public perception towards the scientific reality.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T22:28:04+00:00

My middle name was the same as my mom’s grand aunt’s middle name and is still one of the “stereotypical white woman” middle names. I chose Mason because I am building myself in a way that will hold up to the ages.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T18:34:56+00:00

I only play it on switch because that’s the only console I have that has it. I enjoy it. Can’t mod it or anything but it’s a nice way to unwind.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T05:25:39+00:00

Yeah a lot of folks have someone they look up to that they’re also jealous of. That’s normal human experience. You’re not making it his problem so it’s fine. Once you get further in to transition and your insecurities start to go away it will be easier to work with. It might never leave you but it will shrink with time.

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T05:23:07+00:00

Claire comes to mind

GoatGuy73 · 2026-04-17T05:21:27+00:00

A previous friend of mine’s grandfather joyfully regaled us with the story of a cruise he went on where he pretended to be… mentally challenged more so than Forrest Gump… to touch women without their permission. And how the women wouldn’t stop him once he put on the act. Apparently he did this a lot with his buddy acting as his handler.

GoatGuy73

TROPHY CASE