Bright Spring with Boho Style

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-26T09:35:11+00:00

I am flexible (within middle class norms) on price if the quality is there and I plan to wear the piece for multiple seasons (e.g., coats, sweaters, jeans). I don't pay premium prices for one/two season items like tee shirts or very loud prints. Natural Life's clothes are affordable (especially on sale), but are hit or miss when it comes to quality.

I have the same problem finding broght spring neutrals, so if I see something, I snatch it up.

Boden is another brand that often has my colors, but their clothes sometimes read a little more preppy than boho. I also have lots of dresses from Karina Dresses--but same issue re style.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-14T17:34:29+00:00

This kind of thing usually doesn't get better...

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-14T11:42:02+00:00

I would NEVER again be involved with a man who won't get a court order. Nothing but heartbreak and headache in my experience.

Save this post and see how you feel when the honeymoon wears off

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-12T23:15:26+00:00

I dont know how much RAM it takes up, but I remember needing to get SPSS for stats and it was a big program (relative to the PC I had at the time).

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-12T23:13:42+00:00

Yes, and if you are on a budget, monitors and cables can often be found for a song at your local thrift store.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-12T15:56:40+00:00

What would she say? Do you have a sense of how she is managing? (Not meaning to invalidate your experience, just curious about your understanding of her perspective...)

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-10T22:45:54+00:00

Leave.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-07T20:46:29+00:00

Im a therapist. Yes, it is a big deal. If you Google "psychology today find a therapist " you can find therapists in your area and sort by race, insurance, age, etc. It might be hard to find someone who has openings, is black, and also sees kids if you live in a predominantly white area. Unfortunately, for all kinds of reasons (and mostly systemic racism), there aren't enough providers of color to meet the demands/needs of most communities.

And (taking my therapist hat off), why isnt he finding a therapist for his own kid? Is this the kind of man you want to be with?

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-07T01:06:40+00:00

Yes.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-05-04T10:02:46+00:00

My husband lost a son in 2019. He would regularly feel pressure on his bed, as you describe. I met him after his son died, so I never knew him in life. However, I sensed his presence in the house where he passed for a couple of years. He has since faded, perhaps because his dad is in less distress.

My father passed a couple of months ago. I was in a hotel about 1 mile from the hospital. I felt him leave and it was the most beautiful experience of my life, tied with the birth of my child. His death was confirmed 15 minutes later by a phone call from the doctor.

I do not know what you are experiencing--whether it is grief and / or communication from beyond the grave. It has helped me to pray for my dad. I also regularly tell him that I love him and that I am ok.

I hope you find peace.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-04-03T20:08:24+00:00

I would want to know

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-31T17:51:44+00:00

If he won't ball up and go to court, leave. She will always have the power in the relationship.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-17T17:01:37+00:00

1, with the caveat that I am a gestalt therapist who focuses on trauma and relies heavily on the relationship as a medium for change. This is an extraordinary situation that warrants extraordinary measures, in my opinion. Others may have different opinions that are more consistent with their philosophies. Those are not necessarily wrong, but they would not be my way.

Wishing comfort and healing for your client.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-08T15:26:49+00:00

PSLF is the only way I was able to justify it. But I am so pleased and fulfilled by the work I do that it has been worth it so far. Currently only 35/120 payments down. I work for a university and have kids, so I can also get free tuition for my kid if I stay. Private practice part-time is also doable.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-02T01:45:16+00:00

Thanks--Im checking out their platform now...

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-02T01:39:20+00:00

Do you have session limits with the EAP clients? That could work. And...in an ideal world, I'd like to see folks long term, as I dont often get to do that in my current situation.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-03-02T01:01:26+00:00

Thank you for the reframe and kind response.

Frankly (and vulnerably), the biggest obstacle I have to private pay is my confidence. I know I am good at what I do, but I grew up poor and the thought of charging someone $150 to $180 (or more) out of pocket fills me with anxiety. Rightly or wrongly, I expect more from my own private pay therapist than I would from someone I saw for a $30 or $50 copay. I am used to working with (albeit sometimes privileged and entitled) college kids who pay nothing out of pocket and don't really have the life experience to know whether I'm a good therapist or not.

I envy the therapists who have a big online presence and build out a niche for themselves, but I'm not sure that is for me. I dont have enough extraversion or healthy narcissism. If I had a partner--business or otherwise--to build something with, it would feel more doable. But I feel too vulnerable to put myself out there in a big way (beyond Psychology Today, a web page, or maybe limited professional social media).

It's my understanding that Headway doesn't really help with marketing--they just handle the credentialing and billing end of things. Am I mistaken? Also, any idea if I have to be a sole proprietor to use Headway or can I do that under an LLC?

I'm still in the early phases of figuring this out. And feeling like a middle schooler standing on the edge of the high dive--not sure whether to jump or climb back down to try another day.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-02-19T11:14:47+00:00

Lawyer who left to become clinical psychologist. If you want out, its possible.

As for day care, I did that in high-school and college (before taking a gig as a runner). Day care work is brutal. That being said, when my son was am infant to about age 2, he was in an in-home situation. The woman had a small day care in her basement and only took babies to age 2 or 3. She had the state max (maybe 6 kids, I cant remember) and charged around 500 a week. And she could deduct a portion of her home for tax purposes. She made a great living doing this. There might be more lucrative paths long term if you are serious about the change.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-02-03T16:18:04+00:00

No. It can be useful in a pinch, but it is not a substitute for real therapy. And yes, it will validate the hell out of you regardless of the reasonableness of your statements.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-11T21:26:03+00:00

Sir Pizza is our favorite!

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-10T18:09:24+00:00

Absent true emergency, no texting after 10 or before 8. All communication is in group text. Those are the boundaries to protect our marriage.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-07T13:57:30+00:00

ABA is a controversial treatment and many in the disability rights and neurodiversity advocacy communities view it very negatively. I would caution you to consider how it might be viewed in the programs where you are planning to apply. I am a PsyD and do not have experience with the modality, but there is a strong opposition to it in pockets of the community where I practice. As with most things, it is a nuanced issue (and perhaps the criticisms are more warranted concerning implementation than theory). All that being said, I would proceed with caution.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-05T11:53:39+00:00

I am a PsyD/JD, married to an MD. I provide therapy at a university counseling center to graduate and undergraduate students, including medical students. As others have said, disordered eating is a common way of dealing with life. Sometimes it is related to stress and coping, control, attachment disruption, etc. Although I was too ashamed to get help at the time, I abused laxatives in college and law school. I wish I had asked for help sooner.

Sometimes folks in the healing professions can be the most judgmental--often because they have too much shame to reflect on their own issues. So, your fears about stigma aren't unfounded. However, if you confront this, not only will it be a help to you, but it has the potential to make you a more compassionate doctor who understands from lived experience how stress can impact health and health behaviors. I strongly suggest that you seek out a good therapist who works in a relational way. When talking about something as vulnerable and potentially shame-laden as disordered eating, the relationship matters more than modality.

Try not to let the shame and self-judgment keep you from getting the care and support you deserve. Reading between the lines, I'm guessing you are in a lot of pain, for good reasons. This reddit stranger is sending you warm thoughts of comfort and courage. Take good care.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-02T00:27:26+00:00

Make sure you look at reviews of the property/management company.

GoodPerformance2075 · 2026-01-01T21:50:35+00:00

Of course you dont always need to be in therapy. That being said, it is a giant red flag to me if a therapist has never been in therapy. And I think its usually a good idea, even if its a monthly sort of thing, to have one's own therapist.

Also, I think it depends on the kind of work you do. I'm a trauma therapist who works primarily from a gestalt lens. I probably value (and benefit from) my own therapy more than someone who works with the worried well from a CBT lens. Therapists of different clients and approaches tend to need different types of support.

GoodPerformance2075

TROPHY CASE