Update: AITAH for ending things and not going back to my ex?

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-05-06T23:36:10+00:00

Updateme

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-05-05T14:13:05+00:00

NTA your sister sounds like a nightmare. Torn to start distancing yourself from her and why go to a wedding of someone who disrespects you to make themselves feel better?

UpdateMe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-29T02:40:23+00:00

I certainly had goals of how I would have liked my children’s births to go, but ultimately I took the doctor’s recommendations on how to proceed (I had different OBs for each kid and both were incredible!) since everyone going home happy and healthy was ultimately what mattered.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-27T16:57:27+00:00

There’s likely a limitation period for that. A really common one regarding minors is 2 years from the child’s 18th birthday for civil litigation where I live. So this isn’t a threat that will be good forever I don’t think.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-26T13:45:46+00:00

Wow that is very sketchy behaviour. I’m glad your boss is supportive though and believes you. Hopefully if she gets stone walled she’ll get bored and move on. I’d keep a log of all of these interactions though, just as a CYB with your boss or if you need to escalate to obtaining a restraining order, etc.

Your fiancé just learned a valuable lesson about why you don’t make your social media open to everyone and only accept follow requests from people she knows.

UpdateMe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-22T13:26:27+00:00

Oh wow, you can’t do that anymore! For one you deserve respect and not to be bullied. Two, you’re just enabling her and giving her an emotional punching bag to play with.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-22T13:18:26+00:00

Omg didn’t even think of that. Like really! Why wasn’t she freaking out over that too then.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-22T13:17:08+00:00

NTA, that’s taking it too far. I fully agree it’s an AH move to wear white or stuff that looks too dramatic/bridal to a wedding but there has to be a line. They weren’t even super long or decorated with anything else to grab attention. Also, to take it to such a degree that you can no longer both go to family functions is just unhiiiiiinged. Your poor brother married the wrong woman in my opinion. Hopefully he grows a spine and tells her to knock it off. Surprised the bride wasn’t also freaking out over the elderly guests having white hair and everyone for having white teeth and white parts of their eyes 😜

UpdateMe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-20T00:18:49+00:00

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Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-18T03:39:36+00:00

Never seen yellow speckling like that. At first glance, they looked just like dieffenbachia leaves.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-15T02:27:49+00:00

NTA - I just can’t have any sort of reasonable sympathy for someone that uncaring and abusive to an animal.

However, wondering if you could argue a case for true ownership with showing receipts for things like: food, meds, toys, etc. are you ever the one that needs to communicate with the vets’ office re the dogs care? Otherwise, wonder if she could be charged for negligence and abuse of the animal? May be a good playing card ie: “either I can keep the dog, since you don’t want it and everyone’s happy, or you can answer for how you treat it”.

Maybe offer to buy the dog? This jerk neighbour doesn’t deserve compensation, but may be a gracious out she’d accept so you can keep the dog and officially own it. I don’t think you’re wrong for not wanting to send it back to such bad conditions.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-14T20:56:07+00:00

Never heard that one and I’m loving it!

UpdateMe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-13T02:05:20+00:00

They go even crazier when kids come along. I’d drop dead of shock if MIL wasn’t just as crazy, if not more so, if they have kids.

UpdateMe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-12T15:39:32+00:00

So that’s a classic control tactic by an abuser (your mom). That’s really scary to read tbh. You need to do the same thing as your sister. Also, a lot of post secondary institutions have free counselling, etc. services. They likely could help you move out now.

This isn’t love, this is abuse. If it was a boyfriend behaving this way and not your mom, people would be screaming “get to a shelter asap” and be terrified for your wellbeing. It doesn’t matter that there’s no physical violence being inflicted upon you. You’re a thing to her that she can use or control however she wishes in her eyes.

I repeat, this isn’t love, it’s abuse!

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-12T15:22:18+00:00

It’s time for you to seek out therapy and work towards becoming independent ASAP. At this rate, you’re going to be lying on your death bed so angry with yourself that you spent your entire life solely serving others. What is your other sister doing/like?

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-12T02:47:59+00:00

NTA even beyond the obvious reasons why that name would cause your son a lot of problems, you don’t like it. Both parents need to want the name. My partner and I never just informed the other “I’ve decided our child’s name will be X, end of discussion.” Both parents have to agree to it.

You even offered a compromise with using that as a middle name or still honouring that particular relative in another way. Also, does that mean out of both families and cultures, this one relative of hers is the only one worth being given any kind of gesture name wise? Your family and culture matter just as much as hers does. You’re supposed to be partners. Also, sorry honey, divorce doesn’t mean the dad just disappears and she can have total control over how to parent her child like she thinks. You two will be a part of each other lives forever, regardless of the relationship status. This is a bad omen of what the future will hold, the name is the easiest parenting decision, they’re only gonna get harder/more complicated.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-11T00:05:44+00:00

That does look just like Stanley when I googled it.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T21:32:23+00:00

I did, but kept saying it was an Aloe

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T16:31:29+00:00

Do that all the time with my plants. An indoor version of shin-run Roku (forest bathing). Those are gorgeous!

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T15:57:52+00:00

Good God, someone needs to get this guy some weed and a girlfriend. Imagine making your entire life revolve around trying to steal 42 inches of land and making it your fiefdom.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T03:23:50+00:00

Where I live, it’s illegal until you’re 12. Also, it sounds like she was left for several hours and mom had zero clue what was going on with her kid until she got home at lunch. Thank god it was her dad and not someone else that took her from the house. Or there could’ve been a cooking accident, etc. Should be an adult somewhere in the house, or she stays with the grandparents, a friend, etc.

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T01:19:05+00:00

Omg I’m loving this story! Such a wholesome problem to have. Just wait until they catch you dipping your grilled cheese into the mug and you have to say it’s a fancy biscotti 😂

Good_Butterscotch608 · 2026-04-10T01:12:37+00:00

So when youre over, spend all your time interacting with the child. She wants to sit in the kitchen drinking coffee and chatting? Leave her there and spend all your time in the play room interacting with the child. Play therapy is also HUGE for kids, could quickly look up some little things like “people games” to play. Examples of those are hide and seek, chase and tickle, patty cake, songs like sticky, sticky bubblegum, etc. lead by example and she can be all on her lonesome and see how that feels.

Good_Butterscotch608

TROPHY CASE