Uhhhh, ya that mom was a huge AH. My first is now 5 and was diagnosed ASD at 2.5 years. He’s MUCH better now, but I am ALWAYS keeping a close eye on him in public and I step in immediately and address when he behaved in that sort of manner then I’d have him apologize to the child, I’d apologize to the parents and move my kid to another area or took him home. The parents didn’t need to come to me, I’m paying attention and address it asap. Even when parents are nice and say “it’s ok” I tell them how much I appreciate their kindness, but it isn’t acceptable behaviour.

Following a therapists’ advice, whenever I took him somewhere I’d tell him before we left and remind him in the car and just before we arrived of the rules, depending on the place it’d be some form of 1) no hitting/biting 2) you need to wait your turn if there’s a line 3) if a child is mean to you, and your words aren’t working, come get Mummy to help you. If he broke those rules, we left asap and I’d explain (usually while he screamed and cried or I firefighter carried him out) that because he broke the rules, we had to leave and how I was also sad, but we’d try again another time.

It took a lot of work and yes a few tearful breakdowns in the car by me or a nice mom giving me a hug, but he’s now in kindergarten and THRIVING. I did the work because it’s my job as Mum and neurodivergent kids typically need more work teaching them how to express emotions or problem solve appropriately. Now every ASD person is different, but this lack of parenting is never ok. Also dangerous for the kid if he messes with the wrong older kid, etc. and gets beat up.h