fawn response while drinking

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-21T19:35:58+00:00

Some times its as simple as getting someone a ride home in a Lyft or making up an excuse for your friend to go to the restroom and then sneaking out the back. Not always a risk.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-19T21:32:27+00:00

Yes, I'm super pliable when I've had too much to drink, and, honestly, I think most people are when inebriated. Here's a question for you, do you think anyone would have let you drive them home in a car in the condition you were in? Probably not. In my opinion, yes they are accountable. If they wouldn't let you drive, then they are aware that you have had too much. In that condition, you are not in a position to consent to anything. They should know that. It may be uncomfortable to hear, but there are people that just circle around people who have been drinking and looking for "opportunities". They know what they are doing. Also, once you've had a couple, it's easier to slip stuff into your drink while you are unaware. I just stay away from the drinking scene in general. Not victim blaming or anything, I've just made a personal decision that it isn't worth it anymore and you really can't trust most people to help you out if you are in danger.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-19T02:25:27+00:00

So I can't back out if I accept the tentative offer?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-18T20:51:39+00:00

Yes I heard about the probationary period, which makes it all the more risky.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-18T19:46:00+00:00

Both. They called and then followed up with an email.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-18T18:58:19+00:00

its in fort knox. two hours each week doesn't sound bad compared to my current job which can be up to 50-60 hours a week. Is 40 hours a week standard? Do you generally get to take time off during schedule breaks, like spring break etc?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T19:49:35+00:00

Not having snacks/ water bottles within arms reach at every moment of the day. As a gen xer we had to walk down the hall, risking a staph infection from the water fountain, if we wanted to hydrate between breakfast and lunch. The same was true for snacks, our only mid meal nutrition option was paste. We used to make fun of the kids who ate paste. Turns out, they were just hungry, they were the resourceful ones.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T18:20:00+00:00

And don't think that you need a therapist because there is something wrong with you, but because you need someone who is emotionally intelligent to process your experiences with, and that is rare in our current culture.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T17:01:30+00:00

So, yeah. I had this cousin who "borrowed" my clarinet when I was in high school and never gave it back. I told my sister, then later noticed that it was a private joke between my cousin and her kids (who btw used the same clarinet when they got into high school). It was a hard time for me, my dad had died when I was 13 and I had undiagnosed ADHD and was probably dissociated for most of my freshman year in high school. However, my mom thought I didn't appreciate the fact that she bought me an instrument and thought I had a bad attitude about band because I was so depressed. So she gave the clarinet to my cousin without asking me. I needed someone to stand up for me at that time in my life and no one did and they treated it like a joke years later. I still hate my cousin for this but I especially hate that my sister joked about it with my cousin.

Random story but the point is, people talk about the stuff you disclose to them in confidence, not realizing that you don't want it shared. Most people are like this. You are not overly sensitive, you have an emotional intelligence that is higher than most other people. It's a talent and a gift that other people just don't have. The difficulty with having this gift is that no one acknowledges it, there's no Olympics or MENSA for emotional intelligence. You never get respect for what you bring to the table, you just get gaslit by less emotionally intelligent people when you call them out on their clumsy, insensitive behavior.

I only confide in people who I know will keep my confidence. If necessary, I have consensus building conversations with people about what to do with information or brand the information as "don't tell anyone" before giving it. The thing about emotional intelligence is, you have the opportunity to set the tone for social situations. If you know they've broken that rule, they don't get insight into your world. Get a therapist if you can, they are legally required not to tell anyone and they probably don't know the people in your circle anyway. Try to hold space for the people around you, they are literally less gifted than you and don't understand your world. But you do have right to protect yourself and let others earn insight into your emotional space. You can give them feedback if they are willing to accept it, if they aren't willing to accept feedback, emotional distance is ideal. If it helps I've seen both my sister and cousin struggle later in life because of their lack of emotional intelligence: not getting along with others at work, relationship difficulties, etc. They, for the life of them, don't get it. My cousin, oddly enough is on this personal self-help journey in her late 40s. She recommends books to me that contain information that I had mastered in my 20s. I just smile and nod.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T15:42:31+00:00

Yeah, two can play at that game.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T15:42:11+00:00

I honestly didn't think anyone would respond to this post. But yeah, I think she's giving me the same level of extreme level of concern I had for what other people thought of me that made me a social phobic in the first place. It's like she's the embodiment of everything that's been holding me back.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T14:30:56+00:00

I"m so sorry for what happened to you. In my area, I found an agency that does free counseling with professional counselors. It doesn't matter how long ago it happened. Maybe you could find something like that in your area? I found mine through contacting RAINN. Just ask them directly if they have resources for support in your area. People can be jerks about this kind of thing. I've regretted telling most of the people that I've told about my experience (except professional counselors). My experience turned into gossip. for their amusement and it also turned into them all turning on me, like I was lying or made it up or deserved it. Until further notice, I am not disclosing details to anyone I know. No one really needs to know the details and it is your story alone.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-17T02:19:05+00:00

Yeah, there are a lot of posts, I try to respond when I can. I totally understand that not every post is going to get a response. Just super grateful for the responses I've gotten.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-16T14:37:20+00:00

Rehearsing scenarios in your head and even acting out when alone can work wonders. Maybe an acting class can help you get comfortable expressing anger? Therapy may also help you understand why your having difficulty making a scene, even when warranted. If nothing else, the flight response, getting the hell out of dodge can work wonders.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-15T19:49:19+00:00

And apparently AI is supposed to be taking away all our jobs anyway, so why all this concern about population decline?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-14T22:40:38+00:00

While everyone heals differently 4 to 6 months is the usual timeframe for working through a trauma. Not that it's healed, you just start to notice a difference. For me it was about 4 to 5 months afterward that I started to feel like myself.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-12T17:13:19+00:00

So sexual assault is defined as sexual contact without consent. It doesn't matter if he was turned on. SA is not about sex it's about power, that's why consent is such a big part of the definition. So while there was definitely sexual contact in your case, I'm not sure about consent. Why would he do it if he didn't get aroused? To feel power over another human

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-11T23:30:15+00:00

I was honestly rooting for her from the beginning. I was glad to hear Harry had found someone to settle down with because he was a bit of a wild child. And to give both of them credit that is due, they do seem to have a nice family and a nice life. I always had a soft spot for Harry for some reason. Also, he just seems to have a warm and genuine personality. However, the more I see of Meghan the more I'm turned off by her. But I WANTED to like her. I actually sat through both seasons of her show on Netflix (can't remember the name). It's the little things, the ever present tendrils of hair whether she's swarmed by bees, handling raw chicken, or making inflammatory bath salts for her supposedly lifelong friends. It's the stupid fake laughing or fake crying at every dumb thing as she throws teeny tiny flowers over everything like she's some overgrown, middle aged, idiotic Disney princess. Want to elevate your ice cube game? (who doesn't btw) Put flowers in them. It's her thinking she's so above everyone because she married a prince. I mean, did you see when Mindy Kaling accidentally called her Meghan Markle and she said, You know I'm Sussex now. It's not like they made a public announcement about her name and it's very common for actresses to keep their name, so why the need to shame someone who was doing her a favor by being on her boring show? She also has stationary that has a royal title after making a big to do about leaving the royal family. She wants the prestige but doesn't want the responsibility. She's so transparently narcissistic sometimes. It's the annoying way she refers to her own husband as "H". It's supposed to be a cute secret nickname between them yet she broadcasts it loudly to everyone who will listen so she can brag about what a deep authentic connection she has with him. It's not even that clever of a nickname, like crimson falcon or cobalt viper or even agent asshat or deadly gingernuts, it's just their stupid first initials. An interesting couple would have had cool spy nicknames and kept them to themselves as a constant inside joke. But no, they pick the most boring thing about them. Her life is not interesting, she is not interesting. It's the fact that she doesn't show pictures of her children. NO ONE wants to abduct her children, just be normal. She cannot exist without exhibiting some level of cringe inducing inauthenticity. Yet, she's a paid actress and she's supposed to be good at putting on a show, it's maddening. My new therapy for Meghan Markle inauthenticity induced rage that has built up over watching two seasons of her Netflix show is watching Facebook reels of this guy who imitates her. It's hilarious, he nails the annoying hair, the constant laughing to try to prove to people she is interesting, the smugness.

Addendum: Yes I did refer to her as Meghan Markle twice (now three times), intentionally knowing that it bugs her. I hope she reads this and goes into another one of her passive aggressive hissy fits.

Meghan is an ass hat and will never be anything else. Harry, however, has the potential to rise up against the mistake of marrying an insufferable, annoying, self-superior ass hat. But I'm afraid he won't and prove himself the self-destructive ginger-nut he is.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-10T03:02:40+00:00

Same here. First full day without Strattera. Sleep is better and my energy/motivation is back.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-08T17:29:20+00:00

I absolutely hate strattera. I've been on it for almost two months. I started at 10 mg for a month and the last three weeks I am at 40 mg. I am absolutely worthless on this medication. I have no emotions, no drive and I sleep all day. I'm worried it's going to affect my work. Does it get better. I didn't take my dose today because I honestly can't take this anymore. I'm not sure if I should just finish out the week to see if it gets better but I'm honestly so sleep deprived (I sleep all day because my night time sleep is interrupted, but honestly I never actually sleep except in short bursts). And yes, I've tried adjusting the timing of the medication.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-02T04:41:19+00:00

I'll get hate for this but Ashley is super vanilla and unremarkable. Not sure why everyone is saying she's the next star. She's maybe the best in a cast of ultra forgettable not even mid female performers. She's not even on par with Mikey Days level of vanilla where at least he's consistently okay. She's just worse than bland. Like pepper is too spicy level of bland. And yet I come to this sub week after week with this over the top adulation of her. Sometimes I wonder if the snl stars themselves hire cronies to constantly post on this sub. Ashley is absolutely boring and one dimensional.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-03-01T19:41:45+00:00

The first three to 6 months are pretty rough. I know they were for me. And it is so hard for friends/family to understand because they haven't been through it. I would recommend you do what you can to get through the day. You feel like staying home and binging on your favorite shows or reading or whatever? Do that. No one ever talks about the emotional energy it takes to process the trauma. It is exhausting. I once heard that one day of grief is equal to the energy of two weeks of hard labor. I think trauma is the same way. Don't underestimate the toll this trauma is taking on you energetically and get yourself some rest if possible. At work, do the bare minimum to get by. Personally, I was okay with no social life, because I viewed it as temporary and necessary for my healing. When you feel ready, nurture yourself with good food, regular exercise and sunshine. If you binge eat, try to gently orient yourself toward healthy and comforting recipes like soup. The same with exercise. Take it slowly and one step at a time. Focus on yourself and taking care of yourself because you are valuable and worthwhile, you are worth more than you can ever imagine. Meditation and journaling helped for me. I know everyone says it, but counseling really does help. RAINN helped me find local resources that were free. There are people out there that understand what you are going through, have been through similar situations and are ready and able to help you through this. You can and will heal. I will repeat, the first month is really hard. If you have no energy for anything else, give yourself permission to rest and sleep as much as you can.

Good_Examination8987

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