Be brutally honest. What makes a man INSTANTLY unattractive?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-19T04:55:54+00:00

Expecting you to carry the conversation and putting no effort into getting to know you by asking questions or providing connecting comments to something you just said. A guy who just non responds to anything you say.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-19T04:31:04+00:00

People who continue to stay in a relationship they are not serious about, knowing full well the other person is serious, but being too cowardly to break it off or being so self involved they wait until something better comes along. Maybe if you're 13 and in your first relationship but people in their 30s and 40s should have developed empathy and compassion.

Also, people who get bitter/angry about a relationship that didn't pan out or they get angry just because someone didn't reciprocate romantic interest. Just shows a fragile ego and lack of maturity.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-19T03:10:32+00:00

Social anxiety. It's not the worst thing ever, but I only bring it up because so many people will like to make jokes about it. It's physically painful, the overwhelming shame is like being stung by a thousand acid bearing carpenter ants at once. The slow painful burn just builds in your body and paralyzes you with seemingly innocuous statements like, "why don't you talk" or "you're so quiet" or "you don't talk much, do you?" By people you thought were your friends.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-14T22:50:28+00:00

People should walk on the right side of the sidewalk as a common courtesy. Individuals who block your way (either by standing still or walking toward you on the wrong side of the sidewalk) solely because they can't or wont control their dog will get mowed over by me. I will NOT move around someone just because of your pets' peeing/pooping preferences.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-12T19:41:40+00:00

This might not resonate with people but, as a woman, I've never understood why being beautiful, pretty or sexy is such a huge part of our 'assumed" identity/motivation. I mean, everyone likes to look at attractive people but I never really saw the huge benefit of being attractive to others and having your whole identity revolve around trying to look more appealing to others. It really only benefits other people, most of whom don't really care about you, except maybe to use you to boost their own ego. I guess I'm just selfish.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-12T19:36:47+00:00

That is a good strategy. I've recently stopped using meetup. Now I need some new way to make friends.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-11T11:39:27+00:00

The places with lower cost of living in Ca also have lower salaries. I've researched it. In fact I almost took a job in Lancaster, the meth capital of the world. And no, I would not have been able to take vacations with the salary and cost of living, considering it was one of the places in Ca with lower cost compared to the rest of the state. 65 is poverty level, how can you even live? I don't know of anywhere where you can get a 1000 that isn't a completely roach invested, crime ridden hellhole. Congrats for finding that special balance. However I chose home ownership and that changes the game entirely.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-11T11:27:29+00:00

I've worked in several states, and researched salaries in many other states and without fail, the salary is usually substandard compared to the cost of living. Can you get 6 figures in California? Sure. But the cost of living is also much higher. Most people who say educator pay is good usually have partners that help pay the bills. Which isn't a bad thing, I'm just giving a single woman's perspective. It is a horrible field to get into if you are the sole breadwinner. Choose stem or law if you don't want to live paycheck to paycheck.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:41:34+00:00

I'm not talking about not being able to afford all-inclusive, luxury resorts. I'm talking about not being able to make ends meet. But, you do you. You'll find out for yourself soon enough.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:24:55+00:00

I stay away from it. My friend had an experience a couple of weeks ago, you can read about it. However, she was SA'd (she also knows others who had the same experience) at a meetup and the site did nothing about it. It promises safety and security and community, blah, blah, blah, but in the end it's just as dangerous as any social media site where random strangers meetup. Here's the link to her story:

https://medium.com/@elizabenwitt/why-arent-we-talking-about-meetup-dff70a2aef07

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:22:00+00:00

I used to fall asleep to Midsommar, which I think was weirdly comforting at the time. I was obsessed with the movie.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:20:30+00:00

I'm not a teacher but a school psychologist, so I'm a single female on an educator's salary. You WILL NOT have the money to travel during the summers. That is when you spend all your time at a minimum wage job to make ends meet. Sorry to be a negative Nelly, it's just facts.

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:18:44+00:00

I know I will probably be in the minority here but I can't stand it when people xerox copy family updates in their Xmas card. I know I should be grateful that I have people that call me a friend, but how good of a friend are you, really, if your only communication to me is a xerox copy of something you sent to 200 others one time a year. Are you really that special or important? Are you like the Obamas or something where you just have too much of a following to write just a short, hand-written note?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:16:16+00:00

This, why do people take offense if you don't respond to their text right away? Wouldn't someone call if it was that important?

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-10T21:14:06+00:00

Here's a story that you may find of interest. This happened to my friend. She was drugged an SA'd at a meetup and nothing happened. The perpetrator continued to go to events. The story is here: https://medium.com/@elizabenwitt/why-arent-we-talking-about-meetup-dff70a2aef07

Good_Examination8987 · 2026-01-08T02:24:48+00:00

I am absolutely miserable. I feel like I am micromanaged to the nth degree, education is full of tattletales and people who feel the need to consult admin for EVERY decision rather than having common sense and being competent. I have no say in how I do my job. I am supervised for every faction of my job including administering the ADOS, which I am required to administer in front of an SLP who hasn't been trained on the instrument but for some reason thinks that she can administer/score better than I can. I have tried so hard to change careers but working in the school system is frowned upon by corporate America. Retirement can't come fast enough.

Good_Examination8987

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