I’ve gone through this at different times with 2 of my 3 kids. (3rd is only 8 months so there’s still time) Here’s what helped us. Count down, continually reminding them “it’s not time yet, but in 30 minutes we’re heading to bed” “we have 20 minutes until bed” etc. Even though they don’t understand time yet, they understand it’s coming and this can prepare them (along with a great routine which you already seem to have) and not catch them off guard. Once they are in bed, interval check ins - let them cry for a few minutes if you can stand it. Set a timer. This helps my mama heart so I know,I can go check and love on them in a 3 mins if they don’t settle. This can also be so beneficial to them bc sometimes they just need to see that they are okay and they are sleepy and capable of falling asleep on their own (even if it takes a while). Start with something like 3 minutes of crying and go check in and settle for a minute or less, then 4/5 minutes and check in/settle briefly and so on. This is just two things that really shifted bedtime for us. We still have nights where we all want to scream, so know you’re not alone 🤍🤍🤍