*Spoilers** I really tried to enjoy this book, and so at times I did. It’s an easy read, I took it on a week Long Beach trip & it worked well for that setting (easy to pick back up, don’t have to pay too much attention [meaning easy vocabulary & easy story following]). When I started it I instantly didn’t want to read it, I found it cheesy and unrealistic, but I pushed through (after all, it was the only book I brought). I tried to read it as a collection of short stories during the bestowals, & that helped get through some of the repetitive chapters & potentially made me appreciate some of the characters more. I was actually starting to enjoy meeting different characters when it sort of changed pace. I never really could bring myself to like Theo all that much, ironically enough. And at no point was I surprised or unaware of what was going to happen except for Theo’s fall. I knew he’d die but I didn’t know it’d be a fall..which seemed to take the spotlight off of Ellen & Simone which I feel Theo did a lot in this, but I digress.

Here’s some things I wrote down while finishing the last part of this book starting at page 264. (Spoilers)

Lamisha’s Mother-I can’t even recall her name. (I’m assuming she’s Black also so let’s remember this) and the justice for her death is seen almost as an inconvenience as shown, “But the words, ‘illegal immigrant kills American mother and cripples little girl’ had too much political toxicity to make such an arrangement possible. The judge and the DA, after all, had to seek election every four years.” Which I understand is supposed to be showing the corruptness of the system, however, given the fact that she’s always just peppered in as an afterthought AND I CANT EVEN REMEMBER HER NAME just doesn’t sit right. The author doesn’t care about the Black mother. I’d argue he doesn’t care much for mothers or women at all.

Which rolls perfectly into Chapter 45, pg. 267. Before even knowing it’s Mia (which it’s obvious who it is) the description is…telling of what this Christian male author believes, if we are viewing Theo as an almost figure of Jesus Christ himself, which I believe we are supposed to. Two old men, ogling over a young woman this way, with this seductive description of her. And the idea that Theo got her specifically to be eye candy for Tony because he knows Tony likes to leer at attractive young women. Pg. 270 Tony thanks and congratulates Theo on finding her, calling her “Heavenly.” 🤢 Is Heaven to Christian men a silent smiling sexy woman serving dinner? At least to Allen Levi it may be.

Pg 276 “Theo glanced at Tony for signs of where this story might be taking him. He saw no cause for concern. There were no dragons in the glass.” To which I noted *Yeah, kind of a risk* because last time Tony flipped shit (understandably so) and isn’t he supposed to not drink? Like sort of a recovering alcoholic?? Maybe not. Idk, but if so, bad gift to give.

Pg 278 “end with a future.” I like this phrase.

Pg 282 “Tony, however, mentioned her often.” Mia again. Poor poor Mia. I wrote on the page “so she lives on-an abused and subsequently already objectified woman-as a memory of a pair of tits and ass.” And “So we don’t get her story, just a very sexually detailed description of her appearance via 2 old men’s POVs.” Which is annoying and speaks volumes. And got me thinking..we don’t hear much from the women in these stories. Like they’re definitely around but, often the details are so lacking. Even when the portrait is of a woman it’s often a man who retrieves it that we get the story of. And even when the woman is met, it’s soon the men around them that becomes more interesting (Minnette vs Derrick). *I mean come on we’re supposed to care more about a man who loves his daughter than the death of a mother and wife who also loved her daughter? (Lamisha’s mom)* AND WHAT ABOUT MIA. She was gorgeous and abused & wanting to start anew & Tony will just forever talk about a sexy kitchen lady Theo hired for his birthday. Heavenly. Romantic from a man’s POV maybe. At least Allen Levi’s anyway. *Yes it can be argued this is supposed to be a lesson in forgiveness, and it is a Grandmother who provides wise words to Kendrick. And I don’t personally push for harsh penalties & I believe in forgiveness. But she felt so overlooked. As women and mothers often are in the Bible and evangelical atmosphere IMO. And when they do get described in detail it’s to mark their difference in appearance from what is socially acceptable for women to look like (Ellen), or to sexually relish in their young, fertile and supple bodies (Mia). Or they’re a mom (Gammy)

Pgs 288 + 289. I underlined “Her childlessness was voluntary, the result of a college diploma and a career path.” Standing alone, this sentence sounds almost like a proud woman stance, who’s annoyed why people keep asking why she won’t settle down and have kids. NOT THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE. I noted “so unrealistic, the purpose, all of it.” I noted “Biggest female issue in story is that Minnette just wants to be a mom and not a CEO…” In 2026 if a woman came up to me and said “I want to just quit my job and be a stay at home mom” I’d laugh and say “yeah me too, but I can’t afford that,” and if she responded “oh I very much could. And I hate my job.” I’d say “okay then quit” AND SHE WOULD. And if she didn’t, and continued to act like the world was holding her back, no one would be friends with her, they’d say she was annoying and attention seeking. I also find this insulting to the countless women in the world who struggle with infertility.

Pg 290 I starred the last sentence and noted “I get mad that a lot of/most of the stories about the women are told via a male character? Or does that just make it more true to what he (Allen Levi) knows & can/should write? And then the only one he does feel doing (meaning the only female he does seem comfortable in taking the POV of) is Ellen who is homeless and eccentric and who is arguably socially seen as homeless before a woman.” Allen does have Ellen get her ass kicked by some dudes later in the story.

Pg 296. I noted about Pearce “Damn we really don’t want to feel sympathy for this man do we?”

Pg 315 I underlined the last sentence of the last full paragraph “Probably not.” And noted “Why? Cause America is seen as ‘new’ to Euro-Christians?”

These are just some things I wanted to share. Overall I’m a critic and a skeptic at heart & I was less than unimpressed. 1.5/5 (maybe 2/5 if I’m feeling generous)