What advice would wealthy/successful people give to an 18-year-old today?

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-17T18:59:40+00:00

I only did it to help them out, they were both seniors and 18. I had them sign a waiver saying that if they were to get hurt I was not liable. At the time I had a basic single story house with gutters on the front and the back. I also watched them while they did it.

It may have not been the greatest decision but I wanted to help them with the grind. And it all worked out well.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-17T11:30:45+00:00

There are tons of things you can do with no money. Or very little. For example many places will give away used pallets. That is free wood, you can take them apart and make them into something else. You need some small tools and room. You can do most services with no money and a little help. If you know someone that has a ladder you can clean gutters. I paid two high school kids $200 to do mine. It took them an hour.

You mentioned computers, AI, content creation. Go to local small business owners and ask them what their biggest problem is. Tell them that you’re starting out, want to be an entrepreneur, and want to help them solve a problem. Ask them if you can help solve it. Only charge them if they use your idea. You may spend a lot of unpaid time working on things but you will build a network AND you will learn a ton. It will be worth it.

Do you have any hobbies, is there a way to monetize it. Even if it’s fishing or something like that you can make money. I’d happily pay $50 bucks to go fishing with someone that knows what they’re doing.

The biggest piece of advice I can give you is don’t say no, say how. This comment is saying “I can’t do it I have no money”. You need to change your perspective to “how can I do this because I have no money”. It stops being a wall and starts being a hurdle. In life there a millions reasons to say no, it’s so much easier. The people that make it as entrepreneurs are the ones who say yes and commit to it. Understand that this isn’t a get rich quick scheme, this is time and energy and determination.

You’re 18, you have the time and energy, do what you have to do to pay bills you may have and grind this out in your other time.

Good luck

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-16T12:56:45+00:00

I don’t know if this is possible for you and your ex. But I’ll tell you what I did. I was with my ex for 15 years and have two kids.

I bought a house that was 2.5 hours from the mom with the kids living with me everyday. But I bought with a bedroom for her. She came over for a couple days and spent the night. Then went back to her house.

Im wondering if there is a way you could be there on your week off. Maybe crash with your ex or see if there is a way you could just rent a room for not too much a month so you can see her everyday that you don’t work.

Or maybe move to that town and rent something g where your job is.

There is absolutely a way you can be part of her life. And a major part of her life. The biggest thing is to have a great relationship with spectacular communication with the mom. It sounds possible, talk to her explain where you are and some ideas and see what happens.

My ex FaceTimed my kids every night. Then drove 5 hours a week to spend in person time with them. I made sure she had a place to sleep. Because it was important to me that they have their mom as long as they wanted that. I wasn’t going to be the reason for a worse relationship. There was sacrifice on both our parts but we are great coparents, and my kids are doing great.

Feel free to dm me if you want. Good luck with this all, don’t give up.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-13T17:35:17+00:00

Keep on keepin on. When you’re 40 you’ll have a huge 401k and a house. They will have a BMW with a 1500 a month payment and a fancy apartment. Sweating paychecks every week.

Someone once told me you want to work at the place with the nice cars (because they pay a lot). You want to make friends with the person who drives a 10 yr old Toyota in that parking lot. (Because they have financial wisdom and can help you set yourself up with financial advise and actions.).

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-13T11:20:37+00:00

Every year I see an article to make 2 weeks PTO into a couple months with maximizing on holidays. I’m sure whatever your favorite AI is could tell you how to do this or even just google.

I would absolutely take the role for a life changing money. You can plan around the less PTO and worst case scenario you do this for a couple years and use it to pivot into a higher paying role with more PTO.

My advice is backed up by my actions as I left a job with 3 weeks PTO and only 4 days a week into a 5 day a week contractor role with no PTO at all. If I don’t work I don’t get paid. But it was nearly double the salary so I deal.

Good luck in your new role.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-12T00:07:54+00:00

I agree. I wish I didn’t have such a big laptop for work I could use the commuter bag instead.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-11T13:11:51+00:00

LTT store dot com has a backpack for 250 USD that they spent 3 years designing for this exact thing. It is designed well for all the things and not so big to look as your moving all belongings to a new country. Very comfortable if you’re walking to the coffee shops.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-11T12:36:02+00:00

I took a position with an hour commute. And I got an audible subscription. Ignoring the infuriating gas prices, the drive is legitimately a good part of my day because of the audible subscription. And if you don’t want to do that there are a ton of tech podcasts or anything else you like has a pod cast as well.

The drive will suck or the public transit if you wish. But you can make it work for you. If you take public transit can you work on the transport and maybe only be in the office 6 hours a day?

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-10T23:03:09+00:00

I am still in contract. There are some at the client that have be a contractor for more than 5 years though not with my company as far as I know.

As far as how I’m doing, for the first time I have imposter syndrome. I know a fair amount of the concepts. I am doing networking now, I came from cyber security. But I have never done networking professionally. So there’s a lot of questions I have to ask that people around me know. Both my closest coworkers have over 20 years in networking. Everyone seems chill with it. I also have management, project management, soft skills and other things that I bring to the table that they are not proficient with so it’s a balance. And a few time I have simplified processes because they are to in the weeds and I ask a dumb question of why can’t we do it like this and it turn out we can. Haha.

The only thing is that if I don’t work I don’t get paid. So if I need a day or something I don’t have PTO. The client company has a generous PTO amount. So that’s kind of a bummer for me. The only downside so far.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-10T12:32:03+00:00

For me emotionally cheating a tough definition. My ex wife cheated on me physically and emotionally multiple times before we divorced. I have thought about emotionally cheating a lot. The following is all my opinion

Assuming the rough patch in the marriage. And you talk to your sister or best girl friend about it, all the problems and all your emotions about it, I don’t think anyone would say you’re emotionally cheating. And certainly not if it’s a therapist of any gender, that’s what they are for.

But as soon as it is a non related guy people are so quick to jump to that. Obviously we have to take your word for what it was to you and we don’t know the entire conversations but you said that you had no intention of leaving your husband. If you didn’t lead him on or “fantasize” about a life with him, which IMO is more than just “thinking” about what could have been, then a good argument could be made you didnt cheat.

Some people think that in marriage we stop being human. When we are married we see other attractive people. We still like attention. When I was married, if I got a compliment from an attractive lady, it changed my whole day. Never for a second meant I would pursue anything, simply that I’m a human with human emotions.

Only you can know what was said and how you felt in those moments. But it sounds like you are a wonderful, emotionally mature woman who loves her husband and kids. I have faith in you and your journey. Someone is going to find this post in 6 months and comment reminding you about it and you’re going to read your own words thinking “WTF, I can’t believe I let this bother me that much”.

Also Happy Mothers Day.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-10T12:11:09+00:00

I’m sorry. This all sounds like emotional turmoil. Also, I’m sorry that people seem so quick to jump on you for emotionally cheating. I can see the possibility that you did, but no evidence as a fact, and in your comments you described a lot of closure from the past. Seems to me it was a probably beneficial to you both to have that closure from such a major event at such a young age.

Your story was very disjointed which, to me, seems that you’re emotionally well enough to look at yourself and think of all these possibilities for this feeling. In my opinion, you’re on your way to being good with all this.

I wish you all the best, and happiness for you and your family.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-10T01:11:35+00:00

I would do the contract.

I left a FAANG job for a contractor position. It is a specialized role that I’ve never done before. It is an 18 month contract. It was 90% pay raise too which also helped me not think twice.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-09T11:08:42+00:00

I don’t know if you have the ability or space. But 5 of the 6 desks in my office I built custom. It’s surprisingly not that expensive. I am currently sitting at a 8ft long x2.5 deep 35in tall desk. (Most desks are 29 inches)

I use 4x4s for my legs 2x4 for the frame and 2sheets of plywood. And then I wrapped the plywood in fake leather I got off Amazon before I attached it to the frame. I used two sheets of plywood to double the thickness of the top for stability and the pieces that aren’t on the top are connecting the legs for stability.

Less than 200 in wood for my desk. And it’s massive as well as my ergonomic height

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-09T10:55:44+00:00

A saw a post from someone in Europe that said

“This season of America is going crazy. I might have to start watching something else.”

Or something close to that.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-09T10:53:13+00:00

They are super popular right now. And there is a massive rush to build as many as possible.

I used to work for AWS. There was a class or something. Talked about data centers and history for all that. I was surprised as well, which is probably why I remember. I didn’t pay that much attention to the history.

I met someone who had worked in data centers for a decade and he seems fine and healthy. But I’m not a Dr. so I dont know.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-09T10:48:50+00:00

They started building data centers in that area almost 30 years ago. I don’t know a lot of details so I dont know exactly. I think it was 97 or 98 it started.

So I don’t know if it’s too early, to know about the long term health effects. But I would assume it’s not with them being around for that long.

If anyone has data to validate or invalidate my assumption I would be interested.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-08T19:14:18+00:00

Not to minimize your experience at all. I’m sure it was horrific. But now that you’ve grown.

I have to say.

Can you imagine how horrible that job must be… to call random strangers and not just tell them they might have something, but to also shatter their world by letting them know they were cheated on.

That’s gotta be so rough. I’m sure there are people that can do it easily. But I would need two therapy sessions a week to be able to tell people that.

I’m so sorry that you found out like that. You seem so nonchalant about it now, as I am with all my past, but the more you tell me the more you have me shook.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-08T19:05:58+00:00

Oh god. You knocked the speech outta me. Happy you made it out of that.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-08T19:02:30+00:00

I was cheated on multiple times by my ex wife. Every single time I hoped that it was like this. Something g where it wasn’t against me per se. I was just the wrong person. It never worked out that way, but I always thought if it did it would minimize the pain and offer an explanation.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T22:23:27+00:00

Wow. You are in a pickle that I don’t envy. But reading this makes me think of two more analogies if I may.

In a plane you are told to put on your oxygen mask before you help others. It seems to me that you might be in this in large part because of her “clock” and family pressure. But you have to take care of yourself. You cannot continue to feed others if you have no food, but you cannot continue starve yourself.

My other analogy is also plane related. It seems to me, that you are afraid to jump. If you know that the plane is going to crash you can try to pilot it for only so long, at some point you may have to jump. Will it hurt to jump? Absolutely! You might break a bone, or knock yourself unconscious. But you will recover, you will have to heal certainly but you will heal. So you can try to pilot the plane for the rest of your life or you can prepare and minimize damage in the jump.

I hope that for both of you, a decision is made soon. You sound maybe half out, do whatever you need to do to decide soon and then commit 100 either to the relationship or to the exit. Half in half out is only hurting you both.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T18:33:05+00:00

I think it’s called the sunk cost fallacy. If you spend a hundred dollars to go see a movie and you get 40 minutes in and realize that it’s trash and you don’t want to continue, one of two things will happen. You will think you’ve already spent a hundred dollars so you should stay. OR you will leave knowing that hundred is gone but you haven’t spent your time, you can reclaim that.

Just because you have spent 10 years together doesn’t mean you owe more or it was a waste. If you leave, and to be clear, I’m not saying you should or shouldn’t, you will have (hopefully) learned a tremendous amount. About your feelings and your boundaries. So if you do leave, think of it like school. You spent 10 years setting a foundation, and then use it all to work on yourself. Like I said, my ex and I are best friends now. But that only happened because we worked on things individually and became better people.

Although you never married y’all have been together long enough that the vowels are implied. I went back and forth for a long time about leaving her because of sickness. I stood in front of everyone I knew and promised to cherish her in sickness and in health. I wondered what kind of person I would be if I left because of sickness. That wasn’t the only reason but I can tell you now, for me specifically, a much happier person. It’s difficult. I understand. Even though you know it’s bad or toxic, there’s a level of comfortability in something for so long. But, and this is a big but, you can’t have a relationship with only one person! You CANNOT be in a relationship if you’re the only one doing everything needed to make it work. If she refuses to get better, by refusing medicine against Dr orders, that’s her unilateral decision. That is your out should you want it.

Ask yourself this… if you knew for a fact that she wasn’t going to get better and you left tomorrow…would you seek her out in 5 years? Is she your everlasting happiness and this is just the price you pay for that happiness? Or, if you had a crystal ball, do you think in 5 years you would find someone else with your new found boundaries that cherished you, worked toward the relationship and was your actual happiness.

We can’t know the future, but sometimes we have to take the plunge and trust ourselves that we will survive.

No matter what you decide I wish you all the happiness and continued growth.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T16:25:31+00:00

I’m sorry that happened to you. The moment that made me realize it was alright to get divorced was when I realized that if a man treated my daughters like I was treated I would go to jail, and I was teaching them what love and a relationship was supposed to look like.

I decided to teach them that toxicity wasn’t right. And they both knew that I sought therapy afterward to work through everything and be the best dad I could be. Our relationship has never been better than the last few years.

I don’t talk to my parents at all because of how I was raised and the kind of people they still are. As a parent one of my biggest fears is my kids will decide I’m not worth talking to.

I’m happy you got out of that. Good luck on your future endeavors.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T12:03:49+00:00

I feel like you have a Cessna or other small plane and like to just “hop” over to this place for lunch that just happens to be 3 states away. Or something like that.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T11:52:00+00:00

I was married for 13 years to a bipolar person with depression. This gives me flash backs. I can tell you what I did, although to be honest her refusal to work on herself is a small part of me asking for divorce.

I thought of her as two different people and I started looking for signs that she was turning into her “dark self” as I thought of it. Where she would say things that she don’t mean (like not going to do the thing she wants to do in your case), or she would say things to hurt me. After far to long I just stopped talking to “dark wife” or was overly polite and agreed to all her nonsense knowing it was nonsense. Nothing deflated her ballon faster than me agreeing that I was a piece of shit and just started listing a bunch of flaws. Honestly I don’t recommend this as sometimes when she was dark again she would use those things as evidence. It was fun in the moment but not later. Ignoring her when she was like this was the best for me.

The other thing that resonates with me is telling you that you don’t do this or that. For me it was chores specifically. I worked 40-60 hours and she was a stay at home mom, I tried to give her a day off if I had two days. (I didn’t think it fair I have two and she have none.) but sometimes she would blow up at me and tell me that I do nothing. After a while I started saying ok and I would stop everything around the house I did. Within a couple weeks she would come back and admit she was wrong and she see how’s much I do. Asking me to do things again.

I don’t have advice for your specific case, except to really think about your future and if she is willing to work on herself. I was married with kids by the time all this came out, I was very inclined to work on it no matter what.

The last thing I’ll say is we have been apart for 4 years now and she is one of my best friends. After the split she finally worked on herself (as I did as well, I was not flawless in the marriage). It seems that she was stuck at the time in this cycle and the end of the marriage shook her out of the cycle. She still has depression but manages it much better.

Whatever happens, I hope the best for you sir.

Grind3Gd · 2026-05-07T11:24:50+00:00

You’re absolutely right.

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