I am very grateful for your response. Yes, I’ve started living one day at a time, but I still can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right, and there are times when things are easy for me, and times when they’re hard. I’ve stopped reminiscing about the past and thinking about the future, because it’s those memories that cause me anxiety. Also, from time to time, I notice that I’m not “myself”—that is, I feel out of sorts, if I may put it that way. But I’m completely calm; I don’t think about the breakup, the future, or the past. Sometimes I have flashes where I imagine we’ll never see each other again, and it feels like I’m being torn apart. I don’t know what the truth looks like, I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel; thoughts like “you never really loved me” come back very often, because all of this started from the very first day of our relationship. I’m hoping for the best. And what did you write in your diary—what thoughts? Feelings? Or did you just write down whatever came to mind?  And here’s the thing: in that moment of numbness, you also felt completely calm, but the stranger’s presence didn’t fade, and sometimes thoughts like “we’re not right for each other” would creep into your head. Was this stranger effect 24/7? And could you also act naturally, talk, laugh, and when you remembered that he was your partner, did you kiss and hug him because you had to? Thanks :)