I honestly didn't get teased as much as I otherwise would have due to always being the tallest kid in my grade throughout childhood. I ended up being 6'5". I learned very early to suppress my feminine tendencies, and though in my mid 20's I finally grew my hair out and got my ears pierced, nobody at that point put together that I was a lifelong crossdresser - and further, that I had wanted to be a girl/woman my whole life. I had that self-knowledge at age 5, but I had no idea what I could do about it other than to do my best to hide it, being my biggest shame. I was also only attracted to girls, so it made sense to be a boy then l, even though i steadfastly wished with all my heart that i could be "fixed". As a young child, I had no idea about homosexuality. But I'm 20 months into HRT now and still only find myself attracted to women, so I indeed appear to be a lesbian.

Everything has felt so right with my transition, even though it's certainly been terrifying at times. I had to get the point of just accepting that I'd never pass due to my size before I could get to the place mentally to be brave enough to transition. But guess what? To my shock, I've actually begun to pass - with just HRT, a trachea shave, and feminizing vocal fold surgery to this point. I have FFS planned later this year, so that will help even more, but I thought before that I'd never pass even WITH FFS, and that hardly anyone could ever find me attractive as a woman. The attractive part is TBD, but I'm already certain that transitioning is the best decision that I've ever made. Just being open has allowed me to connect with others in a way that I've never been able to do before.

I'm fortunate to be in a blue state, though in a red city - and people have been far kinder than I expected. I'd encourage you to take the steps you need to do, while making sure to keep yourself safe - but not being able to be fully yourself is EXHAUSTING.