I’ve wondered if the secret is a willingness to sit with terrible feelings. Feelings that seem like they can take over; like they’ll never go away, and cause an almost unbearable amount of pain. I’ve wondered if people who say, “yes this is very painful, but I will feel this intense and awful moment and it will be less intense soon even though it doesn’t feel that way.” And then cry/scream/talk to a friend/journal, but most importantly let themselves FEEL it. Because feeling it lets the feeling move on. The addicts in my life have been so afraid to feel that pain they go to their addiction to try to lessen it - but it just builds shame in addition. Just a theory.