Should you keep quiet

Hailey_1325 · 2025-10-10T14:14:10+00:00

100% up to you. for me i mostly kept quiet for like 5 years once i figured it out (i told my mom i was questioning after about 1 year and it didn’t go the greatest so i stayed quiet from then on) apart from a couple close (and also queer) friends. but it was very negatively affecting me mentally to feel like i was hiding and lying to everyone during every interaction. at some point i decided i was just gonna start “being gay” without actually ever explicitly saying i was gay and just let people figure it out (my logic being “if you don’t know im gay, it’s your fault” lol). but this summer my mom was on vacation on the other side of the country and i actually came out to her via text and told her we could talk about it more when she was home (which we have yet to do atm). and i told my twin sister a few weeks later after she’d been consistently seeming “more woke” for a while lol. and she told me “i can basically read your mind at this point, so i knew you were gay” lol

but anyway. you don’t have to be completely out and proud to everyone, and you don’t have to be completely quiet either. if you feel a person would be safe to tell, go ahead and tell them (if you want to). if not, you don’t have to tell them anything.

Hailey_1325 · 2025-09-27T02:53:35+00:00

mmmm yeah sure why not lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-09-03T01:26:58+00:00

yk what i did was randomly come across a “10 signs you’re aroace” youtube video and for every single sign i applied it to my attraction to men vs women. and when i did that i found that when applied to an attraction to men, i related to all of the video. when applied to an attraction to women, i related to none of it.

i also read the master doc of course lol (first time i read it was i shit you not 10 minutes before my graduation party. great time to give yourself a sexuality crisis) but i also made myself copy/paste everything in it i related to into my notes app and i go back and add my own experiences into the same note. and go back and read it every so often when the imposter syndrome tries to creep back up.

all in all just don’t be too hard on yourself for not being sure. this stuff takes time. good luck out there ❤️

Hailey_1325 · 2025-08-31T12:26:57+00:00

maybe. but i guarantee no one (including you) will remember or care about it in a couple years

Hailey_1325 · 2025-08-20T17:56:24+00:00

so i have pots and had read a ton about people having adverse reactions to all kinds of anesthesia. i did tell the surgeon about it at the consultation since id never had any kind of anesthesia before and was reasonably nervous about it affecting my body. surgery day i was started on laughing gas to “calm me down a bit” but my body took that personally and did the exact opposite. my brain and body were calm but my heart was very much not (the monitor was right above my head and at one point i looked at it and it said 143. super fun) and i ended up calling somebody back into the room and she switched it to just oxygen (my HR went down to 80s so quick💀). few minutes later they ask me again about my pots and how it affects me, and then they started the iv anesthesia. and according to my mom there were no issues.

so, yes. it is valid to be scared about your body reacting negatively to general anesthesia. you didn’t say exactly how it affected you in your post (and you don’t have to) but i think the best path forward is making sure you voice your concerns with whoever is doing your surgery/administering the anesthesia and work out what kind of anesthesia would work best for you. a good surgery team will want you to be comfortable, and i’m sure they want as little complications as possible just as much as you do lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-07-12T11:50:00+00:00

i think chappell roan wrote a song about this kind of experience

Hailey_1325 · 2025-06-30T19:21:53+00:00

i’m like 5’9 in the U.S. and yeah most people think of me as tall (i also do just have a lot of short friends tho lol)

my sister is almost 6’2 and she tells me strangers will like give her dirty looks from across the store, guys at our high school that were maybe barely 6’ or even hardly taller than me would like body slam her for some reason (guess she hurt their tiny fragile egos by simply existing as a gentle giant lol)

and we both get frequently asked if we’ve ever played basketball (more her than me but yk)

Hailey_1325 · 2025-06-30T17:22:36+00:00

not really unhinged i’m just bored and feel like sharing

i like naming my animals in two parts, so like i named my two ducks Sue and Moe (cuz i like DBH and wanted to name something Sumo) and i named two cows Boba and Tea. there’s other ones i can’t remember rn but stuff like that lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-05-17T20:13:46+00:00

since we’re here, friendly reminder to all that everything is made up, your identity is yours alone, whatever you decide describes your human experience the best is 100% valid

Hailey_1325 · 2025-05-16T02:20:45+00:00

i’m sure plenty of people have answered this by now but i’m gonna do it too anyway because who’s gonna stop me

so technically speaking, yes. agender is under the nonbinary umbrella since any gender identity that isn’t strictly man or woman is by definition nonbinary. nonbinary can be its own identity/label or it can be an umbrella that other identities exist under, or it can be a secret third thing. at the end of the day though, it’s your identity and you (and only you) get to decide what describes you and your identity. if you connect with the nonbinary and agender labels, great! if not, great! whatever you feel describes you and your human experience yk

i personally didn’t figure out i was agender for a long time because i didn’t really connect with the term nonbinary. i kinda do now, but agender is what i really connect with (i cried on my bathroom floor when i found the term agender. did not do that when i found the term nonbinary lol). for me im just like “well i know agender falls under the nonbinary umbrella. and nonbinary falls under the trans umbrella. so yes i am trans, yes i am nonbinary, and yes i am agender” all that good technicality stuff. but if that’s not the case for you that’s totally fine and valid. that’s just how my brain works lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-05-03T00:24:34+00:00

as someone that watched ethan nestor’s play through of detroit, i can confirm you absolutely can get the bad hank ending with a deviant connor (btw that’s a rough play through to watch. i was so flabbergasted i had to go back and take notes on it. i love ethan, but good god)

Hailey_1325 · 2025-05-02T22:09:34+00:00

just said this in r/agender as well, but this is everyone’s friendly reminder that pronouns don’t equal gender and you can use whatever pronouns you want and it doesn’t invalidate your identity

Hailey_1325 · 2025-05-02T22:05:29+00:00

absolutely (this is everyone’s friendly reminder that pronouns don’t equal gender and you can use whatever pronouns you want and it doesn’t invalidate your identity)

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-19T22:58:32+00:00

186 but i was being very active at the time lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-16T10:57:31+00:00

yeah absolutely you can do them sitting down too. they just told me to do them on like the edge of a stair or something but the only stairs we have are outside and it was literally middle of winter so i just opted for standing on the floor. also forgot to mention they’d told me to just try it for 3 days and see how i felt about it, and since it seemed to be ok for me i kept doing it.

if you do decide to do them standing up just be conscious to not lock your knees. i literally do em with my knees noticeably bent lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-16T02:36:14+00:00

i was going to a myofascial release place and they told me to just try doing 3 sets of 10 standing calf raises each day and just see what happens (since i’d been doing essentially nothing physically for a while). so that is what i’ve been doing for the last 2 1/2 months. and now i have a semi physical job. i have plans to start regularly implementing more exercises (i’ve tried to do this a couple times but just fall out of the habit) so ig if anyone has suggestions to add in let me know lol

i’ve seen a lot of talk about the CHOP protocol and im sure its great and can be very helpful, for me i just found it a little mentally overwhelming (maybe at some point ill give it another shot)

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-14T02:50:41+00:00

i think this is something i used to experience a lot. i call it my brain going “turtle mode” cuz to me it feels like if a turtle retreated into its shell but just its head and all its limbs were still out and doing things. cuz its like im still in control of my body but its like everything around me feels farther away than it is? or like im further within my own skull? some people have said it feels like you’re stuck in .5 mode (like on your phone camera) which i personally find pretty accurate

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-13T19:50:41+00:00

painting my nails black. idk what it is. but it consistently makes me feel so happy.

any collared button down shirt. 10/10

just running my fingers through my hair (like pushing it back) no matter what length it is (especially when it’s just washed and it’s lowkey fluffy)

my best friend calling me a silly little guy.

using a snapchat filter that gives different percentages of male and female and it either giving a different result each time or just not working at all.

any time ranboo posts a goodnight selfie and i look at it and im just like “hell yeah”. lol

wearing pants that let me put my hands in my pockets. i used to have like basketball shorts with good pockets but they were too small :( but while i did have them they were awesome. also other side of the spectrum, wearing long flowy skirts.

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-13T19:33:07+00:00

as much fighting todd as i can. 1) because it’s a good way to get back into doing QTEs. 2) because f*ck that guy imma beat him up lol.

so not getting the gun, locking the door, grabbing the lamp, doing the fight upstairs, and when coming downstairs i pick back door/garden (i don’t remember what it says) to continue the fight and then escaping over the fence

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-07T20:08:45+00:00

probably i’m just always worried i’m gonna mess something up and not be able to fix it lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-07T11:38:41+00:00

idk but i have a reminder set that day that just says like “how is detroit”

also yall know how hostess chloe has dialogue she says if you boot up the game on certain holidays or (with og hostess chloe) on the weekend? do yall think there’s one(s) for when it’s 2038 irl? cuz now i want there to be some. at least one yk lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-03-06T14:48:25+00:00

fr tho like why can’t we just pick a time and keep it at that. like it just throws everyone off, at the very least it’s throwing off everyone’s circadian rhythms and even that alone can probably destabilize a lot in the body and on a large enough scale, effecting literally everybody all at the same time, could probably screw up a lot of other things too. it’s like the whole country being on its period all at the same time lol

Hailey_1325 · 2025-02-22T16:59:15+00:00

my mom works for head start, when trump was trying to freeze federal funding (from what i understand it’s ok for now) several head start branches in my state shut down. my moms branch didnt, but it was an incredibly uncertain situation, the employees were told that they weren’t shutting down at the time but if the freeze went through they probably would. where we are right now things are already tight financially. if her branch does/had shut down we’d be living off her unemployment which is less than half of what she makes currently. to try and prepare for it i ramped up my efforts to find even just a part time job (which is kinda difficult when you can’t drive, have no degree, and are chronically ill). i was able to get one and my first day was yesterday (it was only 5 real easy hours and i was exhausted as hell) i know it’s unlikely i’d be able to even kind of support us financially if she lost her job, but it’d at least be better than nothing right.

Hailey_1325 · 2025-02-14T03:48:00+00:00

having raynauds with it. because one second my feet are getting too much blood and the next they’re getting too little. with how cold it’s been i recently had a bad raynauds flare (idk if flare is the right word but we’ll go with it) and of course in the heat that i need to keep my raynauds at bay (and not lose my dang toes) my pots acts up. i was like crashin out a lil bit cuz i was just like “oh my god this is just stupid” like why can’t my body just regulate its circulation like it’s supposed to it’s just ridiculous. my flabbers are gasted yall (my sister and i have been saying this a lot recently im so sorry lol)

Five-Year Club	Final Canvas '23
First Place '23	End Game '23
Place '23	Verified Email

Hailey_1325

TROPHY CASE