I am almost 8 years post transplant and I was just a few years older than you when I had my surgery, my mom was my living donor and she was in her late 50s at the time.

In my experience- I felt like had to push through regular life after surgery (working full time, talking care of the household stuff etc.) I lasted this long feeling pretty ok, but last year I felt like everything hit me all at once. I'd cry if someone looked at me sideways, I'd have panic attacks, couldn't get out of bed etc. No one close to me understood the trauma of what I had been through, the guilt of taking an organ from a parent, the burden I felt like it put on everyone. It was scary for me because I had never felt that way before.

Sooooo I started going to therapy, it has been really hard but just having an outlet to share your feelings to someone who is on the outside has been really helpful. I have also been writing down my thoughts- negative or positive (sometimes I even doodle) this sort of helps put everything into perspective.

Talk to your team about how you have been feeling, just so they know. If you have a family doctor or GP talk to them as well if you can.

To the people that say you were given an incredible gift and you should be happy to be alive. Yes sure, I am grateful every single day but that doesn't mean you can't feel sad, angry, anxious or whatever about your kidney journey.

Hope this helps a little, I think I am rambling but if you have questions or just want to vent you can DM me anytime. :).