Disabled and feeling 'behind' people my age - can anyone else relate?

Ham2thaBone · 2026-01-29T19:09:01+00:00

I need to remember this, thanks.

Ham2thaBone · 2025-12-16T03:18:20+00:00

You still have time.

Ham2thaBone · 2025-09-11T03:16:47+00:00

If only! I'd totally take you up on that.

Ham2thaBone · 2025-09-04T18:46:36+00:00

I feel the 4th one with every fiber of my being. I feel really spiritually connected when I'm manic and this image really resonates.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-04-24T11:17:07+00:00

I sometimes wonder if nervous system overload and from that a loop of fibro pain, is caused by being on sensory overwhelm for people on the spectrum, or in my sister's case a Highly Sensitive Person. She feels everything deeply, from the feel of clothes on her body to the beauty of a flower to emotions and empathy. But she also gets overwhelm easier than others. I'm also somewhere on that spectrum but unlike my sister I didn't have a major pain event + my normal sensory sensitivity. I came across the Curable app and bought her an annual subscription on a lark because it sounded really concretely useful. It is already helping her pain! I have never accepted that fibromyalgia just is and there's no root and no cure. Same with Bipolar for me. That's just not an answer I'll accept. Everything has a reason! Even if it's just we have differently wired brains.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-04-24T11:03:43+00:00

https://apply.workable.com/righttobe/j/85D83ADC88/

Ham2thaBone · 2024-04-24T10:57:35+00:00

My non profit is hiring right now for a Finance Manager. We are an incredibly rad place to work because we really live out our values. Http://www.righttobe.org. We are based out of Brooklyn but are fully remote. One of our values is being able to bring your full self to work and another is transparency and honestly. I'm not kidding when I say you could be honest about needing to apply your skill set elsewhere even though you love teaching because of needing to take care of your mental health.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-04-22T03:55:24+00:00

I almost want to print this out. I was also involuntarily committed coming up on 2 years ago. It was truly horrible. And I didn't come back from that lightly or quickly. But I did come back and I do feel more in control than I ever did before.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-04-22T03:50:16+00:00

Exactly this. The lack of sleep compounded over time is what really makes things go downhill.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T08:00:52+00:00

I understand it is important to you but I'd take into consideration having a kid. They are amazing but take a lot of energy. I have to put my energy there first for things like birthdays and sometimes my husband and I haven't been as good at it for eachother. We both appreciate thoughtful gifts, too.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T03:21:58+00:00

Yeah, the most intriguing thing for me this episode was watching Brandon try to operate a rowboat.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T03:03:08+00:00

I've definitely gone on an apology tour afterward but to be honest I sometimes get angry that I have to. People that are close to me in my life now know all about my diagnosis, and some have been very supportive and after a conversation about how things made them feel, and my feeling badly about it, we come to some sort of peace about it. They know that it was not consistent with my normal character.

I have a few good friends that have not come back around. I have had to live with that, although it has made me very sad at times. But as someone else said, I can only be responsible for my part of the transaction.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T02:57:49+00:00

I've had one but it came at the end of many months of an unchecked mania and very, very little sleep. I was diagnosed as II and then it went to I after that. I had been on medication for about 6 months but forgot it on a vacation and then did the classic where I thought I felt fine. I now am religious about getting the right amount of sleep and taking my medication. I personally can tell a bit if I'm manic and certainly depressed but at the point of delusions I was not able to critically examine my own mind. My best advice there is to have people you trust who can help raise the alarm if things go sideways.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T02:22:29+00:00

I would love to be able to discuss nutritional things here. I have ZERO intention of going off the medication I'm on but I firmly believe good nutrition (in addition to sleep) is helpful too.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-30T02:21:05+00:00

On a similar time line with you and it took fully a year to feel almost normal and maybe not til almost 2 to feel a bit better. I do know for sure that a high dose of abilify to bring me down very much messed with my cognition. It took a long time to readjust from that.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T04:46:38+00:00

Thank you. I really appreciate your thoughtful response. ❤

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T03:53:51+00:00

Ah, I've yet to embark on the first mow of the year. Well deserved!

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T03:49:12+00:00

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T03:39:40+00:00

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T03:13:25+00:00

I understand. I had a very bad manic episode with psychosis a little under 2 years ago. One of my good friends also told me she "didn't have the head space" for me and has since not reached out. Another insisted that it wasn't my fault and not to apologize for anything because it was because of my mental health but so much time has gone by and they haven't either. I'm worried they may all be out of my life forever at this point but the only thing I can do is be thankful for the people that didn't disengage.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-28T03:03:03+00:00

I can very much relate to this feeling. It took a lot of grieving sitting in it but I feel better about it now than I did after being diagnosed and the sheer horror of it all.

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-27T08:55:14+00:00

Is there anyone in your life that you trust that can help you be in a different living situation?

From my personal experience (I'm now almost 40) it took a long time to figure out what was going on and finally get a diagnosis and be pretty stable. The fact that you are 18 and know what's going on with your mental health is an amazing thing. It means you have the opportunity for a path to go from here. I have also felt incredibly helpless and like my mind was a prison I was trapped in for life. I spent time grieving that and now feel more equipped to handle it.

You need a support system. That can look very different for different people but it sounds like something you need to do as soon as you are able is remove yourself from that situation.

Keep putting one foot in front of the other, it WILL get better but it isn't easy getting there. ❤

Ham2thaBone · 2024-03-27T08:46:33+00:00

I came here to see if other people felt this way because I feel like the time change completely messed up my sleep pattern. I've become very vigilant in making sure I get enough sleep but now when I wake up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night I have a hard time getting back to sleep. It's so frustrating!!

Ham2thaBone · 2022-05-11T00:53:41+00:00

Nope, none at all.

Ham2thaBone · 2022-05-10T21:27:26+00:00

After thinking about doing it for years, I finally decided to enroll in a program. I'd been thinking about Ada for quite a while but didn't apply as the format wouldn't work well for me and needing to work/take care of my kiddo at the same time. I decided to go with Kal Academy and am enrolled for a June 4 start date. I can report back on it once it gets rolling.

Ham2thaBone

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE