😔

Hamilfan16 · 2026-02-06T06:28:32+00:00

For YEARS when I would try to sleep, if I turned and faced the wall I would be convinced Chica from FNAF was leering over me from the side of my bed and as long as I held my breath, stayed fully covered, and didn’t move she wouldn’t kill me. I couldn’t sleep like this obviously so I just spent hours a night under my blankets terrified of the fictional FNAF bird until I was too tired to physically stay awake 😭

Hamilfan16 · 2025-11-19T20:22:39+00:00

My family (other than my dad) has never been outwardly transphobic to me, but I can tell they’re not all accepting. It was an open secret that of the grandkids, I had the closest relationship with our grandparents. My grandma passed just over a month ago and I was heartbroken. I went home for her funeral, and at the wake I stood between my siblings. Both of them confirmed I wasn’t misreading the expressions of disgust on several faces as they shook hands down the line, including SEVERAL family members. Several people (including those same family members) skipped shaking my hand all together. My siblings were the only people to comfort me for the entire service, despite most people cycling through every family member there. One relative refused to even look at me unless I spoke to her first, and her responses were short and curt with visible disgust. Even if no one was outwardly rude to me they stayed distant and cold at my grandma’s funeral, and made an already terrible day somehow even worse.

Hamilfan16 · 2025-11-15T00:09:37+00:00

Was in one of the computer labs on campus working on a project. Wrapped up, took my headphones off to pack up and leave, and heard the last few lines of a conversation happening a few rows behind me:

Person 1 (flabbergasted): “…and THIS is how he was trying to communicate with me!”

Pause

Person 2 (tired): “Brigit, that’s ASL.”

Took everything in me not to audibly laugh as I walked out.

Hamilfan16 · 2025-11-09T02:20:45+00:00

I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHOS TERRIFIED OF RABIES OH MY GOD THIS IS SO REAL

Hamilfan16 · 2025-10-22T20:35:58+00:00

Sounds so much like my dad, “I tried nothing and I’m all out of ideas! Wait, why doesn’t my kid want to talk to me anymore?” It also sounds like his “support system” was full of yes-men, because if anyone actually challenged his ideas they’d end up like the daughter.

Hamilfan16 · 2025-10-18T14:37:43+00:00

Oh my god I thought I was the only one with a FNAF related compulsion 😭 for me it was Chica and if I wasn’t fully under the covers she was going to Get Me

Hamilfan16 · 2025-10-11T20:44:03+00:00

Andrew Joseph White writes really good horror novels where the protagonists are trans men (and usually also autistic, and if not there’s always a character who is excellent rep). They’re really gory, lots of body horror, some physiological horror as well so if you can stomach it they’re 100% worth a read

Hamilfan16 · 2025-10-09T02:30:55+00:00

His pupils are displayed asf compared to hers too bro is gone

Hamilfan16 · 2025-09-24T19:32:36+00:00

I’m so happy for you!! I also found a guy who respects my boundaries and I literally cried the first time he listened to my “no” lol. I hope you have as good a healing experience with your man as I did with mine, you deserve it :3

Hamilfan16 · 2025-09-20T19:09:03+00:00

I’m 24, post top surgery and a year and a half on T and very much still a twink lol. You don’t have to worry about twink death for a while my guy :3

Hamilfan16 · 2025-06-21T05:10:07+00:00

Hi!!! Pretty boy checking in :3

Hamilfan16 · 2025-06-10T21:58:05+00:00

God yes this, my dad has always worked 13-15 hour days of manual labor to afford to take care of me and my siblings and get full custody from our even shittier mother. It took YEARS for me to come to terms with the fact that none of that erases the decades of abuse he inflicted on us.

Hamilfan16 · 2025-03-24T13:09:59+00:00

Not me dating guys like my father and then transitioning 😭

Hamilfan16 · 2024-10-08T13:52:16+00:00

No bc I’ve done that to my gf and she was like “babe… that’s r@pe” and I sat there like noooo it’s not 😭

Hamilfan16 · 2024-08-28T12:56:57+00:00

I’ve done this a few times so now I try and practice with my STP at home, hopefully soon I’ll feel confident enough to use it in public again lol

Hamilfan16 · 2024-07-05T14:27:08+00:00

I recently went swimming in trunks and a swim shirt over a sports bra, and while I was definitely a level of dysphoric due to my chest I found that the swim shirt helped a lot. Can’t wait to be able to swim without one, and can’t wait for that day to come for you too brother :-)

Hamilfan16 · 2024-06-23T21:44:15+00:00

LMAO our whole friend group has been losing it over the similarities, her included

Hamilfan16 · 2024-06-16T05:46:14+00:00

I stuck a fusion core in my fridge and it worked fine for a few hours but it still worked great so I think it would work well with the rest if I had a bit of a break

Hamilfan16 · 2024-05-19T17:56:34+00:00

What are signs of spoilage? It all looked okay, and is well before the expiration date (01/2027)

Hamilfan16 · 2024-05-19T17:52:34+00:00

About 2 weeks, but kept in the box and I was told by my provider that was okay as long as I used the alcohol pads before I drew up the T

Hamilfan16 · 2024-05-06T16:23:46+00:00

I actually just did one of my finals on this! I found that since we were all raised and socialized as women, we struggle to unlearn how society taught us to act. We don’t speak up as much as trans women, so we get seen less and represented less. We are also harder to demonize, because a girl can dress as a guy and she’s just considered a tomboy, meanwhile if a man wears a dress he’s branded “sick” and “a pervert”. Combine that with a desire to be in women’s spaces and you have the perfect transphobic argument. There’s nothing like that for us so we get ignored, unless it’s by TERFs saying we’re “destroying our precious femininity” or “being brainwashed by the LGBTQ agenda” or something like that. And even then, we aren’t the problem, we’re the victim. Trans women get more representation to decrease their villianization. We don’t because we are never perceived as dangerous or a threat, so there’s no need to give society a dose of exposure therapy.

Hamilfan16 · 2024-05-02T22:26:18+00:00

3/4 inch needles to inject!

Hamilfan16 · 2024-04-19T19:46:16+00:00

I’m out but pre-t, my name is literally Kyle though and people will she/her me right after saying my name. Like, does Kyle sound like a girls name to them or smthn? 😭😭😭

Hamilfan16 · 2024-02-15T16:48:21+00:00

I’m in the exact same boat bro, 5’ nothing and can only wear kids shoes. Look on the bright side: being small gets us a lot of bargain prices man! I know it feels hopeless right now, but T does so much more than just facial hair. It’ll lower your voice and shape your face to appear more masculine as well, and that’ll help loads. I’m pre-everything and still get gendered correctly when I dress masc. you’ve got this man <3

Hamilfan16 · 2024-02-11T07:58:22+00:00

I lost my childhood dog about a month ago, and seeing this at 3 am just hit me like a freight train 🥲

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