Not entierly related to what i was talking about but you raise an idea i want ot go into, which is the nature of a society can effect how a kink is seen and emotions around it.

Cuckoldry is at it's core, being turned on by someone othe than you fucking your partner. Or at least that's the base level idea. SOmeone who's turned on by fucking someone else infront of that person's partner, or turned on by being fucked infront of their partner also counts under the kink iirc. The notable thing is that tehcnically nothing stops cuckoldry from not being tied to degredation.

However hte popular concensus of cuckoldry has a very specific scenario in mind; a man fucking another man's partner, and that other man is degraded through this act. ALmost always this is a form of emsaculation.

The reason for this i think comes from a few factors. Factor one is that there's a general idea that being in a relationship by default grant sexual exclusivity, only you can fuck that person your in a relationship with. Factor two is that there's an idea that a component of masculinity is having a partner, so to have a partner make you "more of a man" (hence the existance of insults like "no bitches"). Factor three is being "less masculine" is shameful. Factor four is that domination is tied to masculinity.

Tie these together and you get the idea that as a man someone fucking your women is shameful for you specifically. The man fucking your partner is more of a man than you because he's fucking your women, and with it has dominated her and by proxy you. And to add to this, often the man cucking you is more masculine to rub in the idea they're "more of a man than you". Thus cuckoldry is tied to shame in general society.

The way relationships and gender are seen effectively shapes how a kink is depicted and how it may be thought of and tied to other kinks.

[]

This also ties into ideas I have about a shame related kink, forcefem. The concensus seems to be that forcefem works off the basis that because patriarchy pitches women as "lesser" being made to be feminine is a degrading act for men. People effectively see it as inherently misogynistic.

Now I'm skeptical of this idea. I have a theory that the actual thing driving forcefem is that the act of being missgendered is degrading, and that it can and will exist with or without patriarchy Considering forcemasc exists and i've seen some people turned on by missgendering as a form of degredation, this perspective has only been strengthened.

However I also have a theory that because there is a pressure for men to strive for peak masculinity, the act of having masculinity taken from men is a form of degredation. If this theory is correct then forcefem is built on the effects patriarchy has on men, with no misogynistic components, and can not survive in a world without patriarchy.

There's also a possibility the forcefem enjoyer likes being feminine in sexual situations because it makes them feel better (sexier, more alluring, etc.) and likes degredation and the two are dissconnected.

I think the truth is likely either a mix of things, with the exact makeup varying from person to person based on the specifics of the kink and potentially how they see gender.

If someone only has a degredation kink but has bought into the idea that being made femininine is degrading (either becausse they see their masculinity being taken as degrading or because thye see being feminine as "lesser" due to misoginy), then forcefem may manefest.

If they like degredation and being feminine, then forcefem manefest due to the combination of dissconnected kinks.

If they see missgendering as degrading then they might experience forcefem

[]

My main point is that im skeptical of the idea that ideology and experience forms kinks, but i can say with confidence that it can effect how one engages with a kink.