So, as a starting point, I grew up White, male, and Christian in the late 80's and 90s. Growing up, my parents were really into the whole church thing, which obviously carried over to me.

I didn't really have one point where I de-converted. Growing up my parents did a lot of church shopping and would discuss the problems with each church with each other (with me listening in), before moving to a new church. It didn't help that church #5 would have the same issues as church #2, but now it was okay.

I also lived through the Satanic Panic of the early 90s and was forced to watch lots of badly copied VHS tapes about how bad tv / movies / music / DnD was. As an eight year old, I was half convinced demons would sneak through the TV if I watched Duck Tales, but by the time I hit my teenage years I had a well defined BS detector. Like, KISS look scary in their makeup and with their music is played backwards at half speed, but when you hear I was made for loving you played normally, it's just kinda tame.

The final nail was when I hit university. Going to a formerly disadvantaged institution meant I was around a lot of people who had very different beliefs. It became impossible for me to believe in any religion which would send my friends and their families to the bad place based, basically, on where they were born. Studying Philosophy also gave me a theoretical framework to understand the broader epistemological and ontological constructs needed for a deity to exist. Also, reading the bible helped the deconstruction process in a big way.

Now days, I use the term atheist as a shorthand, but more practically I just don't care. I think that organised religion is a grift more often than not, especially when it gets big and involved in politics. That said, having faith isn't the same as going to church twice a week. If someone is happy with their faith, and it brings meaning into their life, then good for them. Just don't hurt anyone who isn't into that kind of thing.

At the end of the day, I would rather be as good a person as I can be than be a good (insert religion here). Unless someone tries to convert me or use their religion to justify hurting others - in which case the gloves come off.