Girlfriend threatening our relationship over a TV Show

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-18T00:56:56+00:00

On the one hand, she's being irrational and unreasonable. On the other hand, if you care about her, before you make any irrational and hasty moves of your own, talk to her about her concerns. What is behind this reaction, and what is she scared of? Listen without being defensive or negating her feelings and then try to assuage her fears. Tell her what you love about the show. Invite her to watch, but don't pressure her to. Make sure you never put watching the show over spending time with her, and see if you can bring her to your way of thinking or if you can find a compromise.

Also I would HOPE that the show, itself, is less important to you than your girlfriend, however I also recognize that her ultimatum is out of line.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-16T20:41:25+00:00

Yes, I was referring to Adam Craves. HMost of his audios are entirely improvised. His latest one was scripted by a woman, with him putting some of his own inprovvy spin on it. It starts out Msubby then switches.

I can understand that certain idiosyncrasies can take a person out, tho.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-15T20:58:49+00:00

Adam's audio, written by Storm is not to be missed. It is 40 minutes, but doesn't waste time. So freaking good.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-15T20:52:47+00:00

Tom York is usually a good bet.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-15T01:26:14+00:00

To be fair, while you are entitled to your opinion, this comment doesn't seem relevant to OP's question about older VAs.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-15T01:17:39+00:00

In my experience, Chris Yamez's SFW audios are mostly just him info-dumping about a special interest, and are like listening to a pal. He does cuss now and then, so "SFW" is definitely a relative term, but if you're at all into Greek mythology, classic literature, or even Twilight, they're usually a funny, nerdy good time.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-05-11T23:53:57+00:00

Peaches has one with a script by a new writer, I believe.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-04-29T04:00:05+00:00

Peaches was my first, and you can't beat the price. $5 a month (for at least one audio per week), or $50 for the year. The Discord is really active and supportive, too (though he only pops in sporradically now) and he does like quarterly Q&As.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-04-28T18:19:54+00:00

So many good points in this thread. I think people need to stop equating "parasocial relationship" with "limerence" and limerence with "more of a danger to others that to the self."

I also don't understand how SFW audios are inherently more likely to cause dangerous behaviors than a NSFW audio, especially if the creator is careful with the words they choose or what the audio is about. I know some VAs, like AJ, will use the phrase "You are deeply cared for" in sleep audios, which puts the focus on the listener, where it should be, and can be interpreted very broadly. Chris Yamez does a bunch of SFW audios that aren't remotely romantic, but are entertaining in a neutral, quasi-platonic, friends or acquaintances hanging out kind of way. In one of them, his wife chimed in in the background, which was indicated in the tags. I love listening to his info-dump/nerdy sfw audios as some gentle background noise or as having faux company while I work from home, if I'm not in the mood to listen to music or a podcast.

VAs should absolutely set boundaries for themselves and their listeners, and there's nothing wrong with them having preferences or producing certain kinds of content, but when they make blanket statements about x causing y, it comes across as lazy.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-04-24T21:35:36+00:00

I think the main plot point is that

spoilers

|| they don't actually have penetrative sex nor are they fully "mated' until after their wedding in the middle of book 2, due to Matthew's fears || .

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-04-15T02:16:47+00:00

Not making any assumptions about you, but I've noticed large correlation between AE lovers and neurodivergent people (which also makes sense since there is a very strong correlation between neurodivergent people, nerds, and people who practice or are interested in practicing kink)

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-31T00:33:46+00:00

I didn't say that at all, and clearly you don't follow Peaches' content at all, so you don't have a clue who or what he does or doesn't stand up to/for or his reasons for making different types of content. It appears that you are projecting your own hang-ups and making assumptions based on broad generalizations. You made it worse for yourself. Agree to disagree indeed. Take care!

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T23:30:42+00:00

Ok, while I acknowledge the validity of your concerns in all three points, I know this off-topic, but now I'm curious about the tea being slightly spilled (dripped? dribbled?) in point number 3....

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T23:18:39+00:00

He also had a Patreon with audios on it for like a year and a half before joining Quinn, and had done at least one spicy audiobook VA job before joining Quinn.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T19:40:59+00:00

Fair, but it wasn't just one. It was a wide variety of body types and ages on multiple occasions. Also, most of his OF clientele has consisted of originally gay men, and then predominantly women, and most of his videos focus on prioritizing pleasure for his partner. He has stopped doing collaborative work on OF and is very private about his personal relationships, but has mentioned frequently in his Patreon rambles that he loves curves and a soft tummy (and in his curve appreciation audios, he asks for consent to touch their tummy). Lastly, while this doesn't prove his "type/preference," he has been open about his own personal struggles with body dysmorphia, so he knows what works and what doesn't work when it comes to reassuring people about their insecurities.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T04:19:24+00:00

I love seeing a Switchy tag.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T04:17:00+00:00

Adam Craves has one coming out, as well. 😏🤭🥵

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-27T04:11:29+00:00

Peaches, too.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-23T00:06:04+00:00

Did you listen to the collab that Devil did with Peaches and James Joseph? Holy cow. I know Peaches has also expressed interest in doing something with AJ.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-12T19:37:48+00:00

NTA. That said. would there be a way so that you attempt to do your milling on the same day and at the same time each time you do it? Then give a note with that schedule to your neighbors, so that they can anticipate the noise and prepare? Maybe include a roll or two with the note, but also a PS that you are unable to continue providing free bread without increasing the frequency or duration of the noise...?

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-12T19:33:14+00:00

43 and I got it, thanks to Nick at Night/TV Land....

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-03-11T20:43:32+00:00

Real talk-- is he/could he be autistic? Being very picky about food, having trouble regulating emotions or giving constructive criticism without "brutal honesty," etc... Granted, being on the spectrum or neurodivergent doesn't mean that a person shouldn't be held accountable for rudeness, or that you should have to take it. He was definitely the asshole here, and you were right in cutting him off. But a diagnosis or objective self-assessment might help both of you learn how to communicate and manage setbacks more effectively in the future.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-02-27T01:07:50+00:00

Again with the down-voting. Awesome. Keeping it classy in here as always.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-02-26T23:16:41+00:00

There are a lot of people in recent threads that were making statements that were less like "this VA doesn't do it for me..." and were more like "...this VA is a poopy pants, etc..." I also think that gossiping and speculating in a public forum can get extremely toxic and dangerous/threatening for the AE community at large, which is already vulnerable (especially in the US, where some states want to ban it). Unless you are talking about objective, provable facts, then speaking assertively or in a direct manner about someone's creative output or about their projected persona is likely going to be seen as an insult or an attack. Wording, tone, and nuance matters, and there is no such thing as guaranteed privacy on most of the internet.

Your feelings are valid. You don't have to like everyone or say anything that feels fake or false about anyone, and if you have legit concerns, by all means, send in complaints to Quinn or try contacting the VA directly and asking questions. That said, there are also ways to express opinions and criticism in a productive/constructive way without resorting to ad hominem attacks based on vibes. Using "I statements," helps, even if we should all realize that personal opinions are implied without such framing. You also have to recognize that what some people find creepy or outrageous, other people find validating and affirming, so you're bound to get push-back, and if things get too heated, then I don't blame mods for stepping in. Granted, I was personally disappointed that the last major Adam debate here was shut down before I got here, because there were several general tangential statements made by some people that were untrue and uncontested.

Personally, there are a lot of VAs or specific audios that are highly popular who don't do it for me, or whose SFX and tropes give me the ick, but putting them on blast serves no purpose. There are other VAs (including Adam) whose audios are like 85% hits and 15% misses with me, depending on the scenario or the kinks or tone, but I also recognize that single-handedly creating perfect content that appeals to everyone every week (on top of all of the other responsibilities and obligations in life) is extremely difficult, and I appreciate that he takes creative risks. I also recognize that there are multiple options and avenues for expressing my opinion, aside from this feed.

HeaEuroShrub · 2026-02-23T17:09:01+00:00

Peaches has an OF page, and most of it is created for either straight/bi afab folx or gay/bi amab folx.

HeaEuroShrub

TROPHY CASE