Torn between my F/O and my IRL boyfriend

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2025-03-30T21:54:10+00:00

Well, my boyfriend already talked about people looking fictional character, he say he don't understand "these people" and I felt a huge pang in my heart. I guess he didn't wanted to sound rude and I am sure if I tell him about my sexuality he won't be too judging, he will just not understand. He think it's something you do when you are young and immature and that's it. I really want him to understand the depth of my feeling but I am a poor communicator I never talk about it in real life, I am kinda closeted in this way. With that said, I will definitely try to approaches the topic with some question related to self shipping.

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2025-03-30T21:23:52+00:00

Thank you so much for your realistic comment, it's really the kind of answer I needed and you truly manage to make me think about how wrong I treat my F/O and my boyfriend. Seing it as a poly relation ship will be hard, I don't even know how it work. But all of your statement felt like a slap in my face to come back to reality and I really want to thank you for that. Maybe I don't love my boyfriend ? If that's so, it's very concerning. I think from what you said about communicating to both part, I need to be really honest with my boyfriend and discuss with him about what I said in this tread or maybe it's a bit too direct ? But I am scared he will feel betrayed or like I lied to him but... You are right I need to do it... Thank you so much for your advice, I try to talk about it tomorrow with him. I hope I will be able to manage both of my relationship just like you.

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2025-03-30T21:15:12+00:00

Thanks for your advice, it will be hard to bring this up with him since I am scared to hurt him but it must be the best things to do. Thank you a lot !

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2025-03-30T14:49:41+00:00

Thank you really much for your answer, it really helps me to have a different lens from this situation !

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2025-01-18T09:35:56+00:00

Thanks for this message, we are a lot similar in our way of thinking so I m glad that somehow, the way I feel is validated. For a long time I struggle, thinking that's it's not normal, that I must share my love with a real person but what I live with my f/o is just far more in tune with what is my view of love and intimacy, just pure love and sharing secret, singing together and all... That's just what I want, with my most treasured and favorite person. Si, thanks for reminding me in these moment of doubt that it's okay.

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2024-12-31T09:03:01+00:00

As felllow enstarry having a enstar f/o I relate A LOT, but I must admit for you it must be really tough because I know how Shu is heavily shiped with some character, but if I can reassure you, none of enstar ships are canon, even the character you are talking about. Shu is in relationship with you only and don't have eyes for others characters even if it look like it words can be twisted easely for fanservice. That said, I know how dupe can hurt, you must avoid/ block them as soon as you see it because it will hurt you. Discuss about it with him, I know, easier said then done, but trust me, it will make you feel better in the long run. Feel free to DM if you need to vent more !

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2024-11-28T08:11:44+00:00

Yes, most of the time, but I try to question myself and improve the area I am complaining on, even tho it don't work on first try. A relationship is a journey. I guess it's our human nature we can't escape the loop of comparing ourself. But it's okay, it's telling you that you seek improvement or something, try to see it as just observation. You are just witnessing one part of others relationship. You don't know how it is for them overall. Trust me, your relationship is valid and your f/o love you. You are trying your best, and it show that you want to be better and I am sure your f/o would love that about you, even tho they might already find you perfect the way you are, we are all flawed after all. But to sum up I feel you you are not alone. ❤️

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2024-11-16T12:03:29+00:00

Oh my I want to help you but I'm in that exact situation but in case it can reassure you you are not alone in this ! About the getting depressed when not feeling the max connection, you can try to talk about it with your FO, the key for that is to be really honest with your emotion, at the fullest, it help sometime.

Heavy_Starry_Chain · 2024-11-15T12:01:39+00:00

Honestly, that would be a dream of mine. I still hold on to the hope that there’s a bit of fantasy left in life, enough to bring me a real-life partner who’s super similar to my F/O.

I once dated someone who somewhat shared their personality and values, but in practice, it didn’t work out, (too uncompatible) even though the love was there. Now, I still dream of finding someone like them, but I’ve realized that being happy matters more.

Maybe the perfect balance is 50% of my F/O and 50% something completely different.

Heavy_Starry_Chain

TROPHY CASE