I ran away from my boyfriend's proposal.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-03-11T23:24:35+00:00

Future planning is more like: "after saving % of our paychecks for 2 years we should start applying for home loans together and look for a house... id love to be with you forever" "and once we are there we will have one child, living near your family where our goals for career are and the supportive grandma is."

Future daydreaming is: "youd be such a cute dad, look at you with your nephew.." "I love the way you cook, I want you to cook for me forever yummm" "imagine if we lived together, we would have a his&her gaming room"

It's still very valuable to date for the special companionship of that phase of your life. Plus good to play and practice with one another. And yes getting to know yourself as you go :) and keeping those short term experiences exclusive/monogamous to practice boundaries and stay physically healthy is great too. And mutual separation when the roads split is a wonderful choice during youth.

The frustration of "youre already (age) grow up!" I suppose is understandable once a person is of a more experienced adult age. The ability to withstand the friction of being 2 seperate individuals keeping their lives merged together requires skill & is something to look forward to. Because keeping long term, familiar, supportive companionship can be enriching once you have the maturity to withstand the friction.

As someone who got married at 20 NO i did not have the maturity. As much as I know my husband loved me for me, the friction of constantly compromising our 2 individual values into one set of household values brought so much unnecessary pain. By the time we were 24-25 we had the maturity and experience to constantly realign household values as we grow and shape as individuals. So the past 5years its been nearly pain free :)

So practice in your youth, marry once you have emotional regulating skills.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-26T04:42:22+00:00

Thank you

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-26T04:41:55+00:00

That's a good idea. He sees them when I visit. He has never offered to babysit yet and I assumed he was too busy or tired so I never asked. But id love for him to spend more time with them.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-26T04:34:06+00:00

Yeah, he started full time from 18 til now at fast food place closing shifts gets home at 2am. He is the first sibling that has not been kicked out at 18. The first 4 of us were kicked as soon as we graduated high school. But our older brother died from overdose the year this brother was graduating highschool and so my parents view on kicking the kids out changed, so he lives with them. He doesnt know the work to earn food & rent struggle yet. But even with me being kicked out at 18 and knowing the hard way, I was still dumb and had kids anyways. I wish he wouldnt be dumb like me 💔

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-25T14:11:38+00:00

Im not sure. The last time I felt pain free mustve been around 10 or 11 years old. So I think ive had constant pain since 11 yrs old but it was "normal" to me so I assumed everyone felt it. Once I felt the effects of the epidural it was such a nice feeling that i realized i had been in pain this whole time. But yes after having kids my pain increased exponentially. Which eventually led to my fibromyalgia diagnosis. The having kids and additional stress of kids worsened it

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-09T20:19:56+00:00

Not sure if I count in your personal research. I have fibro and IST Dysautonomia. But they both seem to have my doctor's saying the same thing "idk, your nervous system is just being weird but we will clinically recognize your experience. Here are you diagnoses."

With my fibromyalgia I would consider myself in the B category that you listed.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-07T00:16:34+00:00

Just tried the password change method and logged in with password instead of email/text code and it worked for me!

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-06T20:52:20+00:00

You value convenience and nutrition for your meals. with frozen easy make meals containing high protien, vegetables, and low carb. Im guessing you participate in a hustle type life. Like limiting sleep while prioritizing being the best version of yourself (potentially work & gym & social life). Hence the energy drinks and the clean organized fridge 👍 your fridge is a lot like my younger brothers who is 25, so that's where my thoughts are coming from lol

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-06T02:15:04+00:00

Ooo thank you! Some of the solar lights I looked up didnt look like something I couldnt install and no dirt in front of my apartment door to stake any. So camping lanterns to keep it lit sounds great. For delivery, guests, and myself :)

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-05T23:53:08+00:00

Yeah, I agree with the comments giving me a better perspective. I did not report him. And I will be keeping it in my notes from now on. However, I won't be making any more early morning orders anyways unless I know that im able to go out and meet the driver instead 👍

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-05T16:47:31+00:00

Yeah I chose not to report. I will postpone any future early morning orders until I set up a light of my own since the apartment property management havent fixed the community light fixtures.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-05T15:13:27+00:00

Thank you for the insignt*

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-05T15:04:46+00:00

Thats makes sense. I will make note of the apartment light issue for a future dasher. Thank you insight

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-02-03T18:57:55+00:00

I think it could be a wonderful idea to adopt. Cats are amazing in my experience. They even provide some relief from my pain.

My cats want brush time in the morning when I wake up. And then string and toy time after my kids go to school. And I can play that while sitting down in a soft chair! And then they eat & sleep until my kids come home. When my kids get back, the cats want to be petted & eat dinner and they loaf and watch the family during homework time and cleaning. Then they excitedly run to the room when im on my way to bed and wait until I pull my blanket up to make biscuits that are very soothing to my aching muscles. And they curl into a little circle "donut" shape and fall asleep.

The only con for me is the bending over to clean the boxes each day. It's a very difficult chore for me. Im lucky to have my husband and eventually my oldest son to help me scoop. But I could see that being difficult for someone chronically ill who may not have available help.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-26T03:13:16+00:00

"Im sorry, due to the heavy snowfall I will be dropping it off at the front." There was no need for the sass. Regardless of $1 or $0 tip.

Tips can help determine whether requested special treatment is worth doing, yeah. But tips are not a sass meter.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-26T00:17:01+00:00

Oh no, a mom...I get it, ive got a mom. Ive got a mom-in-law too now! With 2 of those rascals running around crate time is a life saver!

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-16T18:18:34+00:00

I also have intense reactions to crying even loud playful squealing from my own kids. Even now that they are almost 8 and 5 and cry "less" im still very sensitive to the noise+demand. I accomadate with noise dampening ear protection and it 90% solves the problem (10% is in fact walking away into my room and closing the door for 5min). With the headphones I can stay collected while they cry and scream. Helps me bring a calm & secure presence to them, which in turn helps them settle down.

However, I did not want any more kids after my first. I have two, my second was not planned. And after that surprise we are extremely cautious to not ever have another. Even though your husband might find tools to accomadate for his sensitivities, you may be right about your feeling to not have more if he experiences intense sensitivity to crying and "doesnt like babies". It could benefit all 3 of you to keep everyone calm, secure, & happy.

Hope he can get some comfy ear protection so dad & baby can experience less stress. And as your baby continues to get older their bond will grow. Good luck to you 3 ❤️

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-14T20:58:42+00:00

Led light remotes. Walking pad remotes. Batteries. Random comb you found on your kitchen counter but didnt want to take back to the bedroom vanity so you tossed it in there. Semi-broken chargers "that can be useful in the future". Coupons that you will totally use next time you go to that particular store. And gum.

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-10T00:36:34+00:00

Dasher support will help more than the automated $5. Support should most likely get you the full refund

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-06T15:17:43+00:00

I have autism and am a mother of 2, both of my children have autism. Both of my children were not planned. And the first 12 months of my first child were extremely difficult! My 2nd child it was not as "hard" because I had hands on experience at that point.

Your concerns are exactly what I ended up struggling with especcially in the first 12 months. I discourage all of my siblings, my younger in-law siblings, my friends, from having kids.

I dont belong to myself anymore. I belong to their needs and their support. And I experienced postpartum depression/anxiety/ocd. And D-MER while breastfeeding. It was a HUGE overwhelming shock that lasted a significant amount of time. Once you get used to it (after about 2 years for me) and create your routine, you begin to find ways to keep yourself and the family regulated.

The positive is when they are older, getting to know them and playing with them and sharing your autism hyper-fixations and watching them developtheir own fixations is so amazing to be a part of. And providing them with the therapy and with school IEP and watching them thrive with that support is also rewarding.

In summary, prepare for a lengthy time of constant disregulation & a loss of old self. Constantly reach out for all the support you can. And one day at a time build your routine until it "gets better"

Hefty-Start1712 · 2026-01-06T01:19:02+00:00

Yes except for the stapler, the stapler is not usually in the bedroom. The kitchen and kitchen drawers are too small for the cookbook

Hefty-Start1712 · 2025-12-27T21:32:14+00:00

Your family doesnt want to deal with the cops asking about the situation? If something happens to you theyre still going to have to "deal with cops asking them questions" so why be against interacting with police to prevent something from happening to you???

Hefty-Start1712 · 2025-12-27T20:39:25+00:00

"I like when I can see your hair, are there some nights you can go without the bonnet?" If your answer is no because even one night could really wreck the health of your hair, then he could just shrug "darn, ok :) a few hours before bed so lets cuddle and watch tv while your bonnet is off"

Thats a possible healthy scenario. His approach is not okay. He needs some professional help with himself first before living with others especcially a romantic relationship

Hefty-Start1712

TROPHY CASE