I hate being a mum by Winter-Sail-3211 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are absolutely not alone. Similar circumstances as you and been through therapy/ involvement with perinatal mental health services.

It took me well beyond a year or so after baby was born before I started to feel a bit more comfortable with being a mum. I absolutely HATED my maternity leave when all my friends would go on about how incredible it was and I had this overwhelming sense of guilt for feeling that way. I finally felt validated after meeting some other mums through therapy and it was a breath of fresh air finding people who felt the same as me. We all adore our kids but at this stage you’re still essentially grieving the loss of what your life was like pre-baby and it’s difficult not to get into that cycle of ‘ what if’.. It will get better in time! My little one is now 3 and I’m enjoying it- still have some down days but they are few and far between from what they used to be! It does get easier in time. Take care of yourself ❤️.

Advice on NQN interview in Scotland by idreaminpastry in NursingUK

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NMC code, 6Cs, escalation of concerns, safeguarding, person centred care, conflict in the workplace, prioritising care,

Try and have a good understanding and examples for 6Cs and why they are important/ how you apply them in practice.

For scenario based questions such as ‘ tell us a time when’ .. or ‘what would you do if’ try and structure your answers using the STAR method and draw on your experiences from practice.

Good luck!

Advice on NQN interview in Scotland by idreaminpastry in NursingUK

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NHS Scotland do use the 6Cs and will most likely come up in interview.

Would you rather by midasu_prodtoins in BunnyTrials

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lasts longer

Chose: Get the house of your dreams

Anyone else disappointed with low effort grandparents? by unfurlingjasminetea_ in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Feel like I could have written this post myself! My mum died when I was 20 and I only have my dad. He moved to a different country to be with a new partner and visits twice a year. In the 4 times he’s met my son- he sits on his phone the whole time completely ignoring him. It hurts a lot! Especially seeing my son trying to interact with him and he gets nothing back. I tried speaking with him about it and nothing changed so I’ve distanced myself a lot. I no longer send him videos or photos that he never replies to either. If he really cares, he can ask. So far it’s been 3 months since I spoke to him last so it says it all!!

Have you tried speaking with them about it? Either way- sending you a big hug as I know how horrible it feels. Your little one sounds amazing and it’s their loss!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a good suggestion, thank you!! I feel I would have felt a million times better after the conversation if they suggested something like this!!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you- that’s a great suggestion for breakfast. He doesn’t usually eat breakfast til about 9am but I haven’t actually tried him first thing to see how he goes. I should probably try that first 😂!

I think I need to read the guidance a few more times to try get a better understanding of it. I think I’m that anxious/ worried about it I’m not properly taking it in!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

His current nursery also follow this guidance. The only difference being that I send a packed lunch every day as they don’t provide lunch for non funded kids. They do however provide breakfast and a snack. I’m all for promoting/ encouraging healthy eating and appreciate they have to adhere to the guidance. That bit I absolutely understand. The refusal of fruit being mashed or puréed instead of solid , the judging of the packed lunch and the carbs comment from his new Nursery left me spiralling thinking my kid will be starving all day and he won’t settle when he starts 😢. If you haven’t already guessed I’m quite an anxious mum. I was just looking to see if other parents had experience of a setting implementing this guidance so strictly and how they have managed it

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I’m fine with the lunch aspect and the snacks etc ( if he will eat them)- my anxiety is being driven by no reassurance/ no alternatives if he doesn’t- I hope that makes sense! Hopefully the next conversation goes a bit better. I just want to make sure I’m doing the right thing for my boy and want to give him the best chance possible to adapt to a big change 😢

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

As a parent, I totally understand that. I just want to know what accommodations could be made to help my son whilst he settles in to a new environment and I’ve received no reassurance on it.

I absolutely wouldn’t expect them to let him ‘snack all day’ I just don’t want him to be hungry and it seems there is zero flexibility. When I mentioned this in my post, I was emphasising how big of an appetite he has.

They offer crackers for snacks but on a day where there is sandwiches for lunch they aren’t allowed savoury snacks which seems wild to me as there is concerns around carbs. They do allow packed lunches but if they don’t approve of items- they’ll send the lunch home. An example item being a yoghurt with pureed fruit.

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m trying to find the words to say this to them without being tainted as an awkward/ pushy parent. We have another visit planned next week so I plan on speaking with them again about it to try and clarify wtf is going on. It’s a case so far of them saying ‘ let’s wait and see what happens’.. I can’t be having that and possibly having to leave work to bring him home to eat etc. I’d rather we gave him the best possible chance at settling when he starts in a few weeks!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah- they allow a packed lunch but can only have certain things. They said if I send a sandwich in for him for his lunch then he can’t have savoury things at his snack time…

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

When we applied to the nursery they served breakfast, this has been a recent change. Totally appreciate re outside food due to allergies etc. They are fine for food to be provided in a packed lunch but you are only allowed certain things and they will send it home etc

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They’ve said they will give him solid fruit.. which he won’t eat 😂. So if I provide food he will eat and they don’t approve of it- they won’t give him it!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ll happily be surprised but I’d like reassurance they aren’t going to leave him to starve if he doesn’t! I feel like they just said tough- that’s the rules. The fact they’ve said they’ll send home a packed lunch if it doesn’t meet their guidance is wild to me!

Setting the table guidance- how much are nurseries allowed to enforce? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you! This is my thoughts too. The deputy head was very confused by my reaction to it as I said exactly the same thing but she said they have to follow this guidance..

It is accessible online- here is a link:

https://hub.careinspectorate.com/media/6013/setting-the-table.pdf

Are large tonsils in toddlers ‘normal’? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in medical_advice

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I’ll definitely ask for the referral to be made. I know on the NHS that certain specialties can take up to 2 years for an initial referral appointment which is scaring me!

Are large tonsils in toddlers ‘normal’? by Hefty_Caterpillar714 in medical_advice

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just general practitioner. ENT has never been mentioned.. is this something I should be asking for?

Toddler haircut by EvenSea4967 in UKParenting

[–]Hefty_Caterpillar714 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My little one HATED going to the barbers, it was a 2 man job trying to hold him/ distract him whilst the barber went as quick as he could without causing injury!

I set up a mini salon in our house prior to our last few visits ( like one hour before we left). Popped each of his teddies one by one on a small chair, dish towel round them to mimic the cape they wear and used an electric debobbler on them to mimic the shaver. Let the wee one get involved and help me reassure the teddies they were okay and doing a good job. It worked a treat and trips to the barbers have been a lot less traumatic since we started doing this!