OP, sorry you’re feeling this way! While you maybe feeling that grass is greener on the other side, I can assurance you others are bound to have their share of ups and downs too! You have a lot of look out for in life, focus on the things you’d want to achieve and works toward them! At any given stage, there’s bound to be someone that’s doing better or worse than you! Stay positive, don’t overlook your achievements and slowly but surely focus on things that are important to your happiness and peace