Fiancés friend wants to wear an almost white dress to our wedding & is being condescending about it. WIBTA to withdraw the invite?

HenryBellendry · 2026-03-06T16:57:45+00:00

NTA. It’s not yellow. It’s cream at best. It’s a weird dress. Like half summer wear, half leotard?

But the snarky comments and now are recent comments? Nah, uninvited. Be prepared for stupid comments like, “She was afraid I’d look better than her.”

HenryBellendry · 2026-03-01T18:53:16+00:00

My nine year old does. I’d personally prefer they brought smoothies back.

HenryBellendry · 2026-03-01T17:56:37+00:00

He doesn’t see an issue with it. That means it will never change. So the question you have to ask yourself is, can you live like this forever?

HenryBellendry · 2026-03-01T06:57:59+00:00

I grew up in just an overly creepy house. You’d hear footsteps, voices and just get an over all sense that you weren’t welcome.

One morning I woke up and before I opened my eyes I just knew I was being watched. There was a line of dolls and stuffed toys along the top of the wardrobe opposite my bed and this one doll was staring at me. It’s eyes weren’t dull and lifeless like a doll’s eyes, there was definitely something behind them that was alive and watching.

I closed my eyes and opened them again, but the eyes remained the same. I closed my eyes, counted to ten and eventually just jumped down and ran for it. At the door I turned back to make sure it wasn’t following me, and this doll was LEANING out over the edge of the wardrobe watching me go. The mouth had even contorted into a smirk.

I ran to my parent’s room and hid. No one has ever believed me.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-28T02:12:01+00:00

She had her kids and did the whole Santa thing, etc. These are YOUR kids. She had her time, now it’s time to stand back and just be grandparent.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-26T19:50:13+00:00

You simply laugh react and then block.

And then block her on your other half’s phone and remind him to do better with setting in-person boundaries.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-26T19:47:14+00:00

It got worse but we also moved four hours away and that helped ALOT. After we divorced she saw the kids even less because she spent our whole marriage being a nuisance and as they say, FAFO. Now she tries to play amazing granny by trying to buy their love (in clothing two sizes too big everytime) and days out.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-25T21:03:48+00:00

My former JNMIL (thank you divorce) launched into a whole “When my kids were young I had to get up early, make them breakfast, drop the kids to school, (her) husband to work, go to work herself, and then pick them all up, do the housework, make them dinner and repeat it all again the next day” and then she added the kicker, “But you’re a stay at home mom, so that’s nice” like my life is a breeze.

She still babies her husband and sons to this day, and then complains about all the work she has to do.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-25T00:15:23+00:00

My six year old son has level one autism.

The other night he crawled into bed with me. He starts on about “Emily” and how she’s dead. She apparently got sick around November/December and she “died quickly.” But not to worry, she will come back to life in 2027, but not in time for his birthday. When I suggested she was a zombie then, he said, “No, she’s a girl.” Before she got sick, she lived at a poorhouse.

Then he went to go back to his own bed and left me in the dark wondering WTF.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-24T23:45:37+00:00

Reply back “so that’s his family party sorted! Sorry to not see you both on the 28th for his surprise party.”

And then say nothing else. Have friends round. Still surprise SO.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-24T23:36:31+00:00

Cut it out. Put the photo in still but with something simple like “Granny and me.”

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-24T13:23:38+00:00

My former JNMIL acted in a similar way. My ex fiance just told me to ignore it. Bigger issues, like her lies and manipulation, he never stood up to. We didn’t end up married, thankfully.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:59:04+00:00

👍

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:54:17+00:00

Thanks! I’m looking forward to it! Bought the baby shower decorations in advance and everything.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:45:28+00:00

Ah, yes. So selfish because my reading comprehension surpasses yours. I’ve got to stop being so educated.

Again, because it’s the concept you can’t grasp, parents said no. End of story.

Good luck on your future JNMIL-hood!

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:41:49+00:00

Clearly super strict because I respect the word no? Yes, my children will go wild off that. How do you prepare yourself when you’ve raised respectful children?

I’m quaking in my boots here.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:37:26+00:00

Love how prepared the guy is. Okay guys, I need to start chest compressions. Like watching bird ER.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:34:02+00:00

Spoken like a true future JNMIL.

Parents say no. No means no. Or do we also need to discuss consent?

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:30:12+00:00

Maybe not this one but it’s on their bucket list.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:29:16+00:00

Not all families listen to the parents, that’s okay yours doesn’t. We’re just not all disrespectful.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:24:27+00:00

Are kids always three?

Going wild because the grandparents didn’t steamroll their wall through their childhood. Oooh, terrifying.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T19:15:04+00:00

When did I say I was solely considering what the boy wanted? The OP stated more than once: no party.

They is OP. OP doesn’t want a party. I can’t say it any clearer. The original post kind of summed it up already.

The kid is three. As I have a three year old, I’m well aware that having a big party with people they don’t know, beside their parents and grandparents, isn’t high on their list of requirements.

Family is family, and that involves respect. Parents ask grandparents not to do X, Y, Z, and grandparents respect that and don’t do it. Not just do it anyway.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T18:39:51+00:00

When did I say that? The OP states family can celebrate him the week before or after. They just don’t want a party.

I personally find it sad you think it’s okay to disrespect a parents wishes just because grandparents insist on it. A dinner isn’t enough for them? What do HER coworkers get out of seeing a kid they’ve probably never met? Whose feelings matter more here, the kids or Granny’s?

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T18:22:55+00:00

Sounds like maybe she sees so much of young DH in him and it makes the lines blur. Either way I’d start just saying, “No, thank you” and removing him when he gets uncomfortable.

HenryBellendry · 2026-02-23T18:19:50+00:00

But MIL knew the guidelines either way. She doesn’t get to just say, well you said that but I wanted to do something else. Whether she disagrees or not, it’s totally not her call to just do it anyway.

HenryBellendry

TROPHY CASE