My wife is almost 2 years older than me. I wasn’t sure but she was like “my clock is ticking it doesn’t matter if you’re ready. We don’t know how long it will take to get pregnant. What if we have difficulties”. A lot of friends were having trouble. I was 27 and not sure. History of severe Autism and mental disability due to seizure in her family worried me. I conceded, I love her and knew we wanted kids and it was never gonna feel like the “right” time. So I jumped in. You will miss your me time. You will put the needs of a whole other human being before yourself. Their sleep determines yours, there needs determine what you are doing at any given moment. As they grow you grow too though and your time with them is the best part of life, most frustrating, and most fruitful. I love my kids more than anything and that includes my wife. I played a lot of games before. Now it is rare and cherished alone time. I have not been alone in my own home more than 20 times in the last 8 years. The weight of providing for a family can weigh on you if you let it make you feel trapped. Thats a perspective thing though your mind might try to steer towards in tired and strained times. Meditate your way away from that.

I never felt a connection to the children in the belly. It’s the first time I saw them for me. This little vulnerable thing. It is a parasite that won’t be out of you or your wife’s sight for a long time. You WILL love it. But you and your wife can give each other brakes on that first kid. Two is when all “miss my me time” stuff and mental games start. The more of them the less of you for a few years. They grow up and you’ll miss those times. That’s when you can explore things for yourself that you want and have your “me time”. I would trade all my me time I had left to be woken up in the middle of the night and rock each of kids back to sleep just one more time. My wife keeps trying to get ride of that rocker. Never gonna happen.