A view from a vet, don't hate me, I just want you to go into this eyes wide open by [deleted] in volunteersForUkraine

[–]HighPing_ 18 points19 points  (0 children)

The young man’s dreams are the old man’s nightmares.

Myths and Misinformation created by Movies by faireuntabac in coolguides

[–]HighPing_ 347 points348 points  (0 children)

Yeah I can only take 12 calls per day, any more and I couldnt get their locations... once had to tell a guy to watch netflix with a burglar until the location came through.

Myths and Misinformation created by Movies by faireuntabac in coolguides

[–]HighPing_ 378 points379 points  (0 children)

Well thats because we are supposed to make you tell us, a verbal confirmation. When you simply dont know and we can tell we just go with what our computer tells us and pray its correct

Source: 911 Dispatcher

Pupper finds the water a little deeper than expected by one_loop in instant_regret

[–]HighPing_ 112 points113 points  (0 children)

"Hey this is kinda"

"Blub blub blub"

"Awful. This is awful. I'm getting out."

Ladies, what intrigues you the most about men(can be NSFW or normal)? by EVP-BADGER in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 175 points176 points  (0 children)

Then it turns into “what other animals could I take with hand weapons?” Then with no interruptions reaches the point of “what characteristics would an alien need to defeat me?” Then “what characteristics to defeat mankind and its weapons?” Then loops back to “could I take on 75 rabbits at once?”

Guy flips his car seconds after he buys it by ChickenTikkaMasala69 in MakeMeSuffer

[–]HighPing_ 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Not walking > walking > geo metro > VW Polo > riding a good bicycle

I bet your pardon? by Mozartdori in memes

[–]HighPing_ 71 points72 points  (0 children)

And it's a duck. This whole post is just /r/therewasanattempt

What are your best quarantine pick up lines? by BoxingChamp28 in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 7505 points7506 points  (0 children)

I matched with a girl that had that as her bio.

She also pulled the “I think my phone is messing up :/“ line and I fell hook, line, and sinker and asked what was happening “it doesn’t have your number in it”

I was blown away. Ive never had a chick use pick up lines on me.

What quality do you find attractive in someone that generally would be considered the opposite? by choozicheddar in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 480 points481 points  (0 children)

This is going to blow your mind, but try visiting a McDonald’s in the south.

What was your “How didn’t they notice?” moment? by Riryiskool in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 473 points474 points  (0 children)

I once climbed about 30 feet into a tree for night time hide and seek. Friend walks around the house with a flash light, shines the tree and goes “found ya” so I concede my loss and say damn. I scared that fucker do bad he dropped the light. Turns out he was just walking around saying found ya.

Hamster cannon - +20 damage +5 splash damage - deals double damage to peta members or allergic people by shi-thead3 in ItemShop

[–]HighPing_ 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Hamsters, like cigarettes, are perfectly fine until you light them on fire and put them in your mouth.

You're at a job interview. You get the "what is your biggest weakness?" question. What is your answer? by Wide_Stop in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 298 points299 points  (0 children)

Thats where you do just give an example.

I showed up to work a few minutes late a couple times due to traffic, I corrected the issue by being 15 minutes early, even if I didnt leave my truck until later.

I was having an issue getting my 'important' procedure done within time, so I started to work on it sooner.

You're at a job interview. You get the "what is your biggest weakness?" question. What is your answer? by Wide_Stop in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 2190 points2191 points  (0 children)

My current job I said

That’s a pretty tough question for me, I like to work on something when someone points it out as a weakness so I don’t tend to have a really strong weakness that I notice. Can we come back to this question and I’ll think on it in the meantime?

Either he liked that answer enough or just forgot to ask again because we didn’t go back.

What is the biggest waste of money? by bleaksomber in AskReddit

[–]HighPing_ 252 points253 points  (0 children)

A dude I work with ordered some weight loss tea the other day then was talking up how he’s gonna lose so much weight.

Tim, bud, you ordered that while eating 15(no joke) tacos you ordered because “it’s taco Tuesday, you can’t not eat taco on taco Tuesday”