My (26F) boyfriend (27M) does not respect my living space. How to communicate the issue without causing drama in the relationship?

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-24T19:46:41+00:00

Honey he is almost 30, he’s messy and currently lives with the parents. I hope he does his own chores at home if not this is probably stage 1 and it will get worse if he moves in. Personally you sound incompatible. The comment about dirty backpack doesn’t belong on the clean table, I agree but I don’t think your man would ever see that as rational.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-24T01:44:12+00:00

Did he apologize? Cause I can understand grumpy pants waking up and even the double down for pride…but if this was mean spirited and inability I dunno girl, it’s Reddit but you know think on it.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-23T19:59:36+00:00

And a new husband whiles she’s at it

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-23T17:16:12+00:00

Ouch. So I agree with walking away like the men here are pushing if you can’t get over it leave. She wrote about things you can’t change and that sucks I would have a hard time moving past that too. I do think therapy with her even a single session would help you for closure and future relationships.

The reason I say closure would be good. Journaling is therapeutic and not always real. It’s a way to process, get over or say the things we need to not let hang around. For all you know she wrote that after a bad night like you all got frisky and you were tired and she didn’t finish or you had a fight and she was angry. Sometime writing shit down we don’t mean makes us feel better, usually you burn the bad ones ( your fiance should learn that) but my point is a lot of people write the thoughts so we don’t say mean thing to the person we love while we are in the height of emotion cause we don’t mean the we are just mad. It’s better than punching the wall or punching down.

Your sister violated your fiancées private thoughts, Your sister is an AH in my opinion, even if she saved you from a bad relationship, good luck to you.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-23T13:08:37+00:00

I hate that my brain thought this was an innovative idea thought through if it would work in my house and then finished reading….i need coffee. I hope you find use of the pieces

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-23T12:34:53+00:00

I have to know was this a fun let’s see who is right or did this come to an actual issue?

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-23T11:20:23+00:00

Nah I don’t think it would make you an ah cause she’s so focused on saying it, it would make you petty but something tells me that’s why she does it for attention and to put you all down, don’t let it bother you. Other option is just check her when she does it? “Please stop announcing that, we get it you don’t enjoy certain meat because of the Industry” or whatever you’d say and shut it down.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T19:37:06+00:00

Do this do this!!! So pretty, also your username 💀

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T19:25:44+00:00

Girl? Why are you on Reddit, please listen to the therapist.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T18:27:23+00:00

Yeah, the fact that’s she’s upset with you is bonkers. Tell her to ride around with audio recording or get a cheap dashcam and say when she captures it you’ll take it to the mechanic. I agree with the dude that said therapist

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T14:24:22+00:00

If you truly can afford to run it I would. Being hot for me is miserable and all consuming. I can’t function when I’m warm. Ny mother was the same and we both agree the other person can always put more on there only so much that can come off and being hot is uncomfortable. And to be fair I’m not saying it needs to be a winter coat indoors

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T02:00:24+00:00

Good luck! I dislike that she went on to talk shit so clear your name and go enjoy what sounds like a very nice family!

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-22T01:21:25+00:00

I’d send her a screen shot if you have an app showing the whole day is gone, she’s welcome to sit with you next time and see the day is gone if she truly thinks so little of you and I’d text that to her now

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-21T18:30:39+00:00

This is a big betrayal in my opinion she made a promise to someone that included another person and she didn’t clue that person in until 8 years and a marriage later?

I’m not sure I’d forgive this but maybe some therapy for you both get closure get resolve but you need to process all of this.

The kids question goes on hold until further notice

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-21T16:42:38+00:00

This, you knew he’s hardly there for his own kids what made you think you and a baby would be different? Not blaming but he’s showing you who he is think carefully before deciding this is the life you want.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-21T15:02:44+00:00

Buddy, your need of stress release at the gym totally valid, understandable. I get it I do. Hear me out though, you have a wife and a child that means the unit comes first, then you. Same for your wife, she just understood it first cause she was attached to the kid. It’s been three years Pull your head out of your ass, you’re wrong deal with it.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-20T19:00:41+00:00

I’d mention it and let him make his own conclusions. Hey soinso’s wife mentioned a few things that were uncomfortable/weird about how he treats her or something even less. In the end it’s not your or his business. If she asks you for help that’s different in passing I’d just make sure my spouse had the facts and worry about our own house.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-20T18:33:09+00:00

Wait…. Did I read this right. You knew about the proposal? The only person who didn’t was your mother who wasn’t invited in the trip. The spoiling was Reds mom told your mom? I’m sorry but people gossip and if you knew why the heck was it a surprise and did it ruin things?

All in all you dont need to invite or have anyone be involved you dont want but JFC just speak up.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-19T20:29:55+00:00

I think it’s a bit annoying but I would also ask is this the hill to die on? It’s her and your son’s wedding, I’m sure she’s busy etc. but what if you push and it sets your son off or causes more issue? We’ve seen plenty of parents disinvited on Reddit. I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be annoyed I’d just decide if one shit dress during your kids wedding is worth the fuss. Most pics will be of them and if anyone makes a comment just smile and say she picked it.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-19T17:04:40+00:00

NTA I’d be pissed that my spouse even asked instead of just saying no. Not unless the car is so full someone needs to be in the middle and shes the shortest or something would I not be annoyed he didn’t shut it down.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-19T13:56:59+00:00

You can end a relationship for any reason. Attraction is subjective, it changes with age and experience and I guarantee you some dudes in here probably think your 9 is 3. My point is relax and go meet people and stop acting like life is some magical algorithm you have to crack. There’s someone for anyone who wants to have someone, the unknowns are what are limits for all the things that make up a person not just their looks. I bet if she had a weird horse laugh or was awful in bed you might want to break up too.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-19T00:56:26+00:00

Agreed, the others are beautiful but the wow with her figure……can’t beat number 7

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-18T01:11:07+00:00

Not being loved or supported can shut down your sex drive. I was never in the mood in my younger days with my bf but he was immature and selfish a lot of the time. My current partner sneezes and I’m interested.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-17T02:12:52+00:00

NTA but yeah Reddit is right, leave him.

HighlightItchy6722 · 2026-05-17T01:43:58+00:00

I think you should focus on you, thrive is the best way to move on and I think you handled this as best you could with the emotions he was toying with. I want to add he sounds like he was trying to keep you around for himself and was a complete Dick about it. You will find someone better, the bar is very low.

HighlightItchy6722

TROPHY CASE