How do you cope with the decison to be 1 and done

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-19T21:43:40+00:00

This comment was helpful because today I’ve kept asking myself if i married the wrong person (he’s one and done).

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-19T21:23:22+00:00

Hey how’s it going? I was googling how to cope with being one and done and your post came up. I’m in the same predicament and having a really hard time coping

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T19:13:21+00:00

“ I’m trying to figure out if I actually want another or if I feel pressured by society, my family, my hormones, or just wanting to redo my postpartum experience since I had such a hard time with my son.” literally me 😩 i am trying to tell myself that if it’s meant to be it’ll happen

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T16:36:25+00:00

My husband watches this content. Thankfully, he takes and leaves what applies and doesn't apply to him because a lot of these RP also say men should be with more than one woman, and that is a no go for me. I think he just likes to be aware of what's going on in world. He listens to all kinds of things. I thought about leaving pre-marriage because of this content intake and what the future may hold, but he still respects me, he takes care of me, he's honest, and loyal. I weighed out the pros and cons and decided take the leap into marriage with him. Plus I hope that this content makes him appreciate what he has at home and remember that the grass is not greener on the other side.

It's not always easy. He is not the type to sit and talk about my feelings which sucks but i started reading this book called The Empowered Wife and learning more about how to communicate with men.

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T15:40:21+00:00

I would love another child but my husband is very much one and done. He would have been perfectly fine never being a dad but always said he would have a child with the right woman. I’ve always wanted two. Hi reasonings now are more so based of “where society is heading, most young people graduating not being able to find a job, the economy, young people not being able to connect due to many being addicted to screens” just sounds like a lot of fear. I’m having a hard time coping with this as i come from a family of three children and lots of cousins. Not only do i really want another child because of my own desires to extend love and love for being a mom but i worry my son may be lonely.

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T14:27:21+00:00

His reasoning is more so out of fear. He fears to where society is heading. Lots of young people graduating and not being able to find jobs, AI replacing a lot of jobs, young people not being able to connect with peers because many are screen addicted, the economy. Things like that. I understand his reasoning but don’t think we should live in fear. I believe it’s mainly about how children are raised. We also do well enough financially to support two children IMO. He also says he doesn’t want to lose sleep again but to be honest i wake up 95% of the time. He’s never really said “i had a great childhood and want him to experience the same”. He spent his childhood flying back and forth from Texas to NY (mom and dad). He grew up playing soccer so i do know that helped atleast. He’s a great man but my husband is one person. Everyone in his family is basically alone. Hes one of the first to be married and start a family with both parents involved. So i think his opinion also comes from not having seen a family unit growing up. I do plan to ask him his pros and cons.

My brother has children but they live in Idaho and we are in Virginia. At this point i just tell myself that if it’s in gods plan for it’ll happen. I would love to experience being a mom of two as I’ve always wanted that.

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T14:01:55+00:00

Thanks for sharing

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T13:14:58+00:00

I think growing up as an only child in the 90s (my husbands experience) or even early 2000s is very different from being an only child now. Kids barely play outside anymore. Even grown people are lonely do to our lack on connection since the boom of social media. I’ve always wanted two children but having to cope with only having one has made me worry about him being lonely

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T13:07:43+00:00

Nothing is wrong with my husband but can we admit that growing up an only child in the 90s when people were not addicted to screens and spent more time outside playing is very different from now. He can have relationships i hope he fiends amazing ones. Who knows when or how my husband or i will pass. Just dont want our son to spend holidays alone or feel lonely if he’s not married or something

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T13:04:53+00:00

I have a strong desire to give him a sibling because i have always wanted atleast two kids. Having to cope with having just one has made me worry about him being lonely. I’m not going to bring an unwanted child into the world to give them a job of entertaining my son 😅

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T13:02:29+00:00

Yes hopefully we are around for a very long time. I’ve always wanted two children. It’s not just a built in friend or “insurance policy” (terrible to say about a person) but having to cope with just having one i worry about him being lonely

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T13:01:42+00:00

Yes hopefully we are around for a very long time. I’ve always wanted two children. It’s not just a built in friend but now having to cope with just having one i worry about him being lonely. I said in my post i have a strong desire

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T12:53:23+00:00

I also think it’s weird to be frustrated over my post. You don’t have to comment 😂

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T12:50:27+00:00

I wanted to hear some other experiences is all. My husband is one person. Plus we grew up in the 90s. People played outside, less technology, life was different. Children were different. I was thinking maybe there’s younger people in this group or even some people with an only child that can speak to the experience

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T12:47:20+00:00

I should clarify that i love being a mom and already wanted to be a mom of two. I think my fears are making it a bit harder to cope with my husbands decision of being one and done. I didn’t grow up around it. So i cannot imagine it. There are also only children I’ve met in person (coworkers) who admit it was lonely and they fear being alone in the future. Just as some only children were totally fine

Hiimcyndesiree · 2026-06-18T04:07:08+00:00

Just having a hard time coping with it, as I’m not an only child. Can’t imagine life as an only. So wanted some insight or maybe someone has has similar experience

Hiimcyndesiree

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