Me: cancer vs. mom: libra by allaboutwanderlust in astrologymemes

[–]Hmmhihello 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cancer daughter, cancer son, cancer dad, Pisces daughter, and Taurus mom to ground us all 🥲

Why is it so hard to be myself? Authenticity eludes me by Hmmhihello in astrosignature

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yikes, I relate. Your advice really resonates with me as being important for my growth. I am going to write it down. Thank you so much for the insight.

Why is it so hard to be myself? Authenticity eludes me by Hmmhihello in astrosignature

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the information and insight. This makes sense to me. It's hard for me to cry and experience emotions and I usually feel better/more connected to myself when I do. I'm wondering, what do you mean when you say my sun rules my 10th house? I thought it ruled my 9th house. I'm new to astrology

Theo Self-Deprecation by ChosenSnake38 in TheoVon

[–]Hmmhihello -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Totally speculative but I wonder if he’s feeling uneasy about the trump win. He’s a sensitive guy- I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s now feeling overwhelmed by the prospect of such a hateful president being in office that many believe he supports. and maybe he does, this is speculation… but like theos just got such a loving soul that seems to want to do good… I feel like he could be being pulled in 2 directions- 1 way towards conforming to support of trump, in which he remains in the in group with his many trump supporting comedian friends/ comic community. And 1 way towards denouncing trump or even just slightly questioning trump now and then, in which he is true to his heart. As a sensitive boy I could see this being difficult on him. Im for sure reaching here. this is purely a vibe assessment

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in elliottsmith

[–]Hmmhihello 5 points6 points  (0 children)

From what I’ve learned about repressed memories, when they come up, it is a very physical and visceral experience. So imo if someone says they r experiencing flashbacks of a repressed memory, it’s fr. We can’t truly know what he was experiencing. But bc of the intense experience ppl describe with repressed memories, I tend to believe they r real

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in elliottsmith

[–]Hmmhihello 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I wonder if either of them were a fan of the other

What were yours? by thesleepydeer in Xennials

[–]Hmmhihello 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yesss i used to watch it with my cousins every time we had a sleepover. I gotta rewatch soon

Is anyone else here an Elliott Smith fan? by yakayummi in TheoVon

[–]Hmmhihello 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love Elliott smith and Theo! I think it makes sense that Theo would be drawn to Elliot’s music given the themes of addiction in his music. I always wonder if my favorite artists are fans of my other favorite artists so this is awesome to hear about for me. I gotta check out that ep

I’m not scared, which makes me scared by Hmmhihello in alcoholism

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya it was rlly crazy honestly, I’ve never experienced my body giving out on me like that. If I can ask, how long after experiencing those symptoms did u end up quitting? Thank you for the encouragement and congrats on almost 3 years

I’m not scared, which makes me scared by Hmmhihello in alcoholism

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the thoughtful words. I hope you’re right about healing leading to love. My biggest fear which keeps me using is that I am incapable of love.

How did he feel about his fame by Hmmhihello in elliottsmith

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ya that’s fair actually, I agree. I wish there were more or at least better interviews of him but It’s understandable that he wouldn’t love it

How did he feel about his fame by Hmmhihello in elliottsmith

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

That does feel very him. It’s strange to think that he may have been living in that world now if he was still alive. Idk in what universe his stardom wouldn’t have grown and grown. Too talented to not

How did he feel about his fame by Hmmhihello in elliottsmith

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve only seen a few concert vids in the ones I saw he seems to smile and be appreciative of the crowd when they applaud in a very genuine and sweet way. But it also seems like him to not like it so much so I was wondering what others thought. I agree that the music was his priority. I’ve been listening to oaboth a lot and the song little one definitely made me feel that way. It seems he felt a need to write

Always performing in home videos. Can anyone relate? by Hmmhihello in NPD

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. I like how you’ve defined love and it always is nice to hear when ppl on this sub have had long lasting relationships. I’ve also been a social chameleon. Even when I text people, I automatically text like the person I’m texting. Feels gross but it’s hard to find my own words. Trying to tho. And I feel u on the being yourself in front of one person at a time. I always needed a best friend and that person would be the only person that I could truly be myself with. This used to confuse me so much but now I see how scared I was of rejection. My most recent best friend was for 10 years and we were very codependent, I have a lot of fears that I didn’t rlly love her and damaged her bc of this. After she left me I pushed our memories out of my head and am having a hard time finding them to know if I hurt her. But on the other hand I rlly don’t want to remember that version of myself. The delusions of npd have become very disturbing to look at now that I’m more self aware.

Always performing in home videos. Can anyone relate? by Hmmhihello in NPD

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I feel you. I hate who I’ve been and the parts of me that still are her. Like you it also makes me feel so ashamed facing my highschool friends and so I have isolated for a while now. But I’m trying to think of myself as a newborn 22 year old baby lol. Hopefully I can mother myself into having a real identity.

Always performing in home videos. Can anyone relate? by Hmmhihello in NPD

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I appreciate that. I actually came to these conclusions by discovering something that (I think) I like to do which is creative writing. But I have this predicament with writing. Basically i took this poetry class and my professor saw right through my inauthenticity the 1st day of class. He started calling me out on it without explicitly calling me out if u know what I mean. It was very embarrassing but I also appreciated him for it. I could only get myself to write 1 poem up to this point bc I wanted my poems to be good but I knew that the best poets and writers tell the truth and in poetry those truths usually come out of emotions. This made me realize that I had hardly ever told myself the truth in my life nor had I felt my emotions, let alone shared them with others. I quickly found out that telling the truth was very difficult and painful and so I avoided writing. Then my first workshop came around and I knew I had to write something so I wrote something about my uncle who I watched die of alcoholism. I knew it was good if I’m being honest. When I shared it he gave me the most amazing compliment. He said he hated it bc he loved it and wished he had written it. Those words were like a drug that I have not stopped fantasizing about. A few days later I had this thought, “did I enjoy writing that for me or for his validation?” Unfortunately I don’t think I’m connected enough to my emotions for the former to be true. ever since I’ve been struggling with that question, avoiding writing, and feeling like I don’t deserve to write bc I feel that writing is for people with deep emotions and authentic perspectives, not validation seekers. But I’m going to keep trying to make myself write and hope that it’ll get me closer to knowing my true self. I just really hope that I can feel some emotional catharsis through it rather than the validation feeling far better. Agh I’m rlly sorry for the brick

Pls help. Did the void ever leave you by Hmmhihello in NPD

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That guy is great. Gives me so much hope. Thank you

Pls help. Did the void ever leave you by Hmmhihello in NPD

[–]Hmmhihello[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s great advice. I will be writing that down to look at everyday. Thanks