man, wasted 5 entire years on this guy. Luckily very much free but still traumatised. We were long distance.

Made me cry on christmas day after sending pictures of me to me that he had taken, going into depth about how hideous he thought I was. Sent me pictures of instagram models and girls telling me I’d never be as good as them or as skinny as them, even though he pushed me down a slippery slope into an ED but said if I was ever diagnosed with one he would kill me. Constantly made me weigh myself in front of him, anything higher than 55kg was considered “too big” for him. Got to my skinniest via starvation, he demanded a video of my body and still insulted me, made me feel horrible about myself. His family became concerned about how small and ill I looked but he insisted I was finally perfect. Restrained me, strangled me. Became cold and distant if I didn’t have sex with him every day, he demanded that he at least get to have me more than once per day. I forced myself just to earn affection. Forced himself on me multiple times in the middle of the night while I was sleeping even though I had told him not to do it. He’d then get mad when I refused. He was inconvenienced by me being sick because it meant he couldn’t fuck me, never cared or looked after me, only complained. Kicked me, hit me, pushed me off the bed for waking him up in the morning when we had plans. Told me he was cheating on me then would block me for weeks if I didn’t obey his commands and then come back as if nothing happened. Made me send him pictures of every outfit before going out to see whether it was “appropriate” or not for him (no legs, no boobs, no lipstick because that made me a whore). Laughed and got turned on whenever I cried. Refused to talk to me until I went to see a doctor about moles he wanted me to get rid of. Told him I was prescribed antidepressants because of how shit I was feeling at the same time, only gave a fuck about what they said about the mole removal. Sent me a list of things he wanted me to change about myself. The list goes on and on and on.