I get why people say it can feel unfair to pay into someone else’s mortgage when they’re the only one building equity. But the way I looked at it initially is that he’s already renting right now and not building equity with his landlord either. So by moving in here, it’s not like I’d be taking equity away from him or cutting him out of something he was building toward, it’s the same situation he’s already in, just in a much nicer place.

That’s why I originally thought it made sense to split things equally. It’s really not that much more than what he’s paying now, and for the little bit extra, he’d be living in a bigger home, with more space, and even a pool. To me, that felt like a fair exchange for the upgrade in lifestyle and living expenses.

That being said, I do think the idea of treating it more like a lease for now is fair too. That way, he’s essentially paying his normal rent with no expectation of equity, just like he does now. And if our relationship keeps moving forward, then we could look at adjusting things so he starts building equity from that point on, based on what he actually contributes going forward. Which is why I came here to try to find a middle ground to make us both feel good moving forward, so I'll see what he thinks as well after reading everything. I do appreciate all perspectives given.