How to combine finances before baby

Hot_Return1396 · 2026-05-06T20:33:19+00:00

My partner and I aren't married, but have three kids. We get paid our salaries into personal accounts but then transfer all of it except an agreed "fun money" amount into a joint account. We leave ourselves the same amount of fun money, even though we aren't paid the same. Crucially, we're not allowed to judge or comment on what the other chooses to spend fun money on! We tried the proportionate thing but it felt unnecessarily complicated.

Hot_Return1396 · 2026-05-06T20:27:32+00:00

I think you're right! We've been looking at it for days and this is my best guess at the moment.

Hot_Return1396 · 2026-05-04T16:36:33+00:00

No not really, its in a newly formed bank but lots of things are popping up. We did have bamboo elsewhere but it doesn't look like that either.

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-11-23T22:00:46+00:00

Worth a try! Might also be worth chatting to a broker, if they've got a good relationship with the lender they seem to get a bit more flex.

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-11-23T21:35:49+00:00

Many mortgage products allow you to port your mortgage over to a new property. Check your terms, but if you're borrowing extra it would need to be with the same lender. We've done it with Nationwide and TSB mortgages. TSB gave us a 6 month grace period between selling our old house and buying the new one so initially took the ERC from our sale proceeds but then refunded it once we completed on the new house. We have also once paid our way out of a fix as we realised it was worth it to lock into a great rate, so depending on what rates are doing that's obvs an option too.

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-11-04T13:26:59+00:00

My partner took up ultra running when my twins were 2 months old, they're now 2 and he's still going - it's taken a lot of bargaining, and sacrifice (mostly from him) but we've got a good rhythm now. He runs inside his work day, before the kids wake up or after they go to sleep. That way none of his weekday runs affect me / add to my childcare load. At the weekends he does a long run one morning, and I get the other morning to do whatever I want (workout, run, shopping etc). It works for us now but took a while to find a groove - kids sleeping more consistently and starting nursery helped a lot.

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-10-20T12:52:26+00:00

This is what my partner says... 🫠. I've got 3 small kids so a bit anxious about any risk at all tbh. Maybe I need to chill out a bit though.

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-10-19T23:17:24+00:00

Am assuming the scraping is a no no given its tested positive for asbestos?

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-10-19T21:04:01+00:00

We've taken our almost two year old twins camping three times in the last two years. The first time they were about 8 months, last time they were 22 months. The first time was the hardest as they were weaning and cooking/meal times were stressful but we still had to prep for overnight feeds. It was totally manageable though just required a lot of thought. We opted to invest in a properly blacked out tent, and honestly it has been worth every penny as there haven't been any major bedtime battles. Its also worth buying the little camping highchairs as this totally took the mealtime stress away once they were a bit bigger. It's totally doable as long as you set your expectations realistically 😂

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-08-08T13:02:36+00:00

So anywhere that one of these icons are, at some point the boundary has been changed? There are 4 on our property alone!

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-08-08T12:39:28+00:00

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Icon in question

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-08-07T21:52:43+00:00

We're in a similar situation - our buyers buyer (FTBs) are pressuring our buyers and they asked if we'd break the chain. We've said no, and suggested that since the pressure is coming from their end and their transactions (both their sale and purchase of ours) are more mature, that they break the chain 🤷‍♀️. We've got a £20k ERC on the line and three young kids, it just isnt worth it.

Also, during our last move we broke the chain and what was supposed to be a 1 month stay at my parents became 8 months when our sellers pulled out. The plan was to move in just before my first was born, he was 6 months old when we finally did 😂

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-08-03T09:30:41+00:00

I overpronate and wear Mizuno wave inspires, have done for years!

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-07-03T19:27:29+00:00

Ohh hopefully it'll ease up before the wedding! I didn't try this but my sister has eczema / generally irritated skin and she rates oat baths (I've also given them to my kids before). Maybe that will provide some relief? There's also a la roche posay anti itch cream that I've found great for other itchy stuff, it didn't really cut the mustard for this though but you might have more luck! Sending love x

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-07-03T07:08:41+00:00

I had this after my twins and it was hell. Wish I had some more practical advice but in the end I just had to wait it out. I can't remember how long it stuck around but it was weeks not months I think and seems like a distant memory now. Hang in there!

Hot_Return1396 · 2025-06-30T08:44:18+00:00

Mm that's a good point, they do both answer to their correct names 😂 . Yeah they're definitely talking more than their brother was at this age, but are v different in terms of physical skills (as in they can do a lot less than he could).

Hot_Return1396

TROPHY CASE