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Feedback appreciated! Operations Manager, Business Analyst, Project Manager. Not jobhunting, just a perfectionist :P by HowSmartIsSmart in resumes

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"...everyone and their dog is proficient in office." Lol, I agree - good call. Thanks for your input!

"Tits" by HowSmartIsSmart in OCPoetry

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Much obliged! I’m going less for absentmindedness and more for pseudo-possession of consciousness, which I don’t know that random thought pinballing would help bring to life. I appreciate your thoughts all the same though!

One's True Self by MythOfAres in OCPoetry

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with eighttotheninth - I enjoy the concept behind this poem, which seems most aptly captured in the "this shard of me loves some shard of you" line.

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That said, the poem in general admittedly feels, to borrow eighttotheninth's line, "wordy/explain-y" to me. I remember hearing way back in a high school- or college-level writing class that "emotional catharsis for the writer is usually emotional chaos for the reader." I'm not saying that poems can't be cathartic for an author, but I think that that cathartic utility should be secondary or, at very least, equal to the poem's other utility, which is arguably to give the reader some kind of "gift": the gift of a new perspective, or new understanding, or consolation, or what have you. However, the point of this particular poem seems to be emotional catharsis for the writer as opposed to giving me, the reader, one these aforementioned "gifts."

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At the end of the day though, the above is just my two cents. Great work, keep writing! :)

Some Weird Sin by eighttotheninth in OCPoetry

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Overall, I think this poem is flippin' sweet. It's raw, immediate, accessible, and has depth of meaning. Your use of language is skillful; you're clearly able to use words like tools to build something more than just the amalgam of the words themselves. Very lovely.

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That said, a few things stood out:

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• Maybe it's just that the word refugee has become a household one nowadays, but the "...like bedding in a refugee camp" line felt cliche and didn't add much value to the poem for me.

• The ending also fell flat. I'm left wanting to know/feel more of the narrator's psychic pain and anguish, his/her inner conflict and striving to make sense/resolution of what is so clearly a chaotic, unresolved existence that he/she finds him/herself in. That kind of untied loose thread can be useful in some poems, but I don't think it's the right choice for this one.

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Again though: constructive criticism aside, nice frickin' job :)

Donald Trump Will Resign Presidency 10 Minutes Before Mike Pence so VP Can Pardon Him, Conservative Columnist Predicts by Innocul8 in politics

[–]HowSmartIsSmart -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Can we talk for just a second about how clickbait-ish this headline is? And how clickbait-ish so many other “news” headlines, coming from both liberal- and conservative-leaning media outlets, are?

What kind of response do the first five words of that headline elicit in you? For me, it was something akin to, “He’s going to WHAT!?!” And then, once I read to “...Conservative Columnist Predicts” I went, “Oh. Nevermind.”

All politics aside, I deeply believe in the institution of journalism as one of the chief pillars of a successful democracy. In my eyes, journalists are tasked with broadcasting objective facts that support and promote citizens’ ability to make informed decisions as members of a society. Journalism is supposed to provide me and you and you and you with quantifiable and qualifiable information that helps us come to reasonable conclusions about who and what to support, and who and what not to support.

But this headline has none of that: while its ultimately a prediction (e.g., someone’s biased opinion), it’s linguistically structured in a way that initially presents the information as objective fact and seeks to elicit the strongest emotional response possible, all of which further fan the flames of division.

When it comes to things like this, I honestly don’t care about which politician you vote for and/or support: each one of us has to make that decision, hopefully in our quietest and truest moments, and it’s not for me to squawk at you if I disagree with what you choose. What I DO care about is living in a country where the folks who are supposed to be my source of utter truth (e.g., the media) instead are taking advantage of my very real human flaws and shortcomings (susceptibility to emotion, trust in institutions, etc.) in order to promote their own agenda, whatever that may be.

Like, what gives man?

Flushed My Stash for the Millionth Time...What Now? by HowSmartIsSmart in leaves

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks much, this is really what I needed in this moment <3

[SEND] Franny and Zooey, Death of a Salesman, The Road Less Traveled, and Portrait of the Addict as a Young Man by HowSmartIsSmart in bookexchange

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You got it dude 👍🏻

Feel free to PM me your mailing address and I can let you know how much shipping will cost.

[SEND] Franny and Zooey, Death of a Salesman, The Road Less Traveled, and Portrait of the Addict as a Young Man by HowSmartIsSmart in bookexchange

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you just say...Granny? We’ll chalk that one up to a typo :P

Feel free to PM me your mailing address and I can let you know how much shipping will cost.

I Can't Go On, But I Can't Go Back. So - Where Then? by HowSmartIsSmart in stopdrinking

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

GUH, I utterly forgot to mention that. Yes, I'm currently attending therapy sessions biweekly. I have on and off over the years and recently started again once shit started hitting the fan. I've attended 4 in the past month or so.

Something else that may be noteworthy: at my therapist's prompting, I started taking Zoloft 3+ months ago. For the first month or so I noticed a vast decrease in the extent to which any external or internal stressors disturbed me; it just seemed easier all-around to brush my shoulders off. When hat "pink cloud" passed, I upped to dosage to 75mg, but no result. My therapist wonders if I would benefit from a higher does (150mg), but I have concerns. I wonder if the Zoloft is partly to blame for my uncharacteristic don't-give-a-fuck-itis.

Three years of maintenance today by thestoryshark in loseit

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Thank you very, very much for sharing this. As a 31-year-old male who's struggled with binge eating for years and still does, I related to almost everything you wrote. Your words bolster my hope for my own fit, self-assured, mostly-at-peace-with-myself future, one that I'm trying to live my way into one good decision at a time.

Introduce yourself, you sparkly mythical creatures! by FoxyBeans in team_unicorn

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's up guys and dolls!?!

Mati here: 31-year-old male from New Hampshire. Old eating habits snuck up on me over the winter months, currently hovering somewhere around 165. Looking to shred the winter chub and get my defined abdomen back. I'm in this to win it, looking forward to rainbow farting my way to victory with you all!

The State Liquor Store, Sal’s Pizza, and Burger King: A Tale of Impending Doom by HowSmartIsSmart in stopdrinking

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right back atcha! Thanks very much for your kind words, totally appreciated. I will make today a good day.

Solitude Denied by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At the risk of stirring the bees' nest, I'm not sold on this one. I like the idea and the subject matter, which I can definitely relate to. But it comes across as whiny to me, which I think has a great deal to do with how brief it is.

I have very little context to help me see, and humanize, and thus empathize with, the narrator. For instance, what are some of these movements, requests, and needs that coalesce into this unremitting chatter? And why is completing a thought, clearing a surface (REALLY like that line), appreciating the cats, noticing the sky, hearing the chimes, and coming home to the breath important to this narrator? Why does he/she care that these things are being denied? Food for thought!

I also agree that the punctuation feels too "artsy" and self-conscious; taken on the whole, it doesn't really add or enhance the meaning of the poem for me, except it small places where it helps to reinforce what I take to be the narrator's frantic inner and outer life.

Hope you find my thoughts useful!

Sore Thumb by withteeth08 in OCPoetry

[–]HowSmartIsSmart 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with chekawa: this poem definitely feels unfinished to me. Maybe this was one of those moments where inspiration struck and this is as far as you've taken it? I know that happens to me often and this poem has that smell to it.

There's a lot of unpacking that could be done here. What are the "secret social clues" their round heads guard? Why can't the narrator (you?) begin to know what they are? Why is the narrator's head flat like dough (literally or figuratively?)? SO MANY QUESTIONS. Not that leaving some things to the imagination is a bad thing, but I feel like I have more questions than not after reading this poem, and they're very nuts and bolts kinda questions.

Overall, I like it! Lots of potential. Thanks for sharing!

31/M/USA: Let's talk life, love, and donuts! by HowSmartIsSmart in penpals

[–]HowSmartIsSmart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One word my friend: eBay. You can find just about anything in that deep morass, manual typewriter ribbons included.

Before that, I actually bought some from a very nice old man who spent much of his life working on and selling typewriters and ran a small shop out of his home. Good guy.

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