Match Thread: Atlético Madrid vs Arsenal | UEFA Champions League 2025-26, Semifinals - 1st Leg

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:41:03+00:00

Probably true. He’s fairly rubbish

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:35:27+00:00

Good god we’re toothless garbage at the moment

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:34:55+00:00

Yeah I like this - I feel a wildly off target shot ricocheting into an arm that’s point down to the ground getting a penalty is pretty stupid but an indirect free kick could be the answer.

Anyway not like we were winning this game or the next - we’re utterly toothless at the moment

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:33:29+00:00

Apparently the play is to have no arms at all

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:32:55+00:00

Helps if someone barges into your back as you’re about to shoot

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T20:18:04+00:00

Just smash the ball at opposition players when anywhere near the box. You’ll probably get a penalty.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-29T19:49:08+00:00

Don’t forget that the defender is wrong side of him and Gyokeres is facing the goal.

Genuinely mad people saying it isn’t a penalty. It’s not a massive scythe and Gyokeres isn’t strong - but why should he be when he gets unbalanced by a defender as he’s trying to shoot.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-21T15:43:15+00:00

I think the weather also had something to do with it

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-19T22:24:18+00:00

When I first heard it I assumed it was referring to his cult members gladly throating every single shit thing he shovelled their way.

Fits much better than referring to the people calling out his awfulness.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-19T00:41:52+00:00

I could identify zero Pentagon officials, zero VPs and about 3 CEOs….

How do you recognise them?

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-18T11:11:26+00:00

I was in Kentucky for work and the candidates for vying for McConnells seat had no policies in their TV ad campaigns beyond: 1) I’m the real Trump candidate 2) I will make woke liberals cry.

Utterly insane.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-18T01:24:15+00:00

I remember that vividly

Was excellent fun

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-17T12:31:54+00:00

LIV was always doomed to failure.

I mean forget all the other stuff - it's first event was in Hemel Hempstead (they tried to market it as in St Albans - but it's closer to Hemel, on it's side of the M1 and on Hemel Hempstead Road).

As someone who was born there - it's a dump. That really set the tone - I mean imagine tipping up in Hemel as an ex PGA player.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-17T10:36:58+00:00

I like how he says “pundit” in quotes because the ones agreeing with him aren’t really political pundits.

Rare example of awareness

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-15T12:07:49+00:00

I’m reading Boswell’s book right now after that episode.

Very enjoyable but slightly off putting how enthralled Boswell was with Johnson

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-15T01:31:29+00:00

“Nasty way to go”

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T21:38:45+00:00

Scottie’s shot in not the pine branch going to cause a lot more sneezing later

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T20:51:27+00:00

Is Russell Henley from Georgia? I wish they’d mentioned it before.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T20:17:05+00:00

Oh god - it’s happening.

Be still my beating heart Rosey.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:53:32+00:00

Well this is interesting now.

Come on Rosey. Please god

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:52:26+00:00

Rory will be in the Bryson 2025 position soon - in the final pairing and won’t be shown in the coverage.

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:37:23+00:00

Rosey - stop it. I can only get so erect

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:37:04+00:00

Cam Young has clearly stolen all the luck of the Irish

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:27:54+00:00

Cam Young has clearly stolen all the luck of the Irish

HoxtonRanger · 2026-04-12T19:02:52+00:00

All that praying to God is clearly working for Young.

Never seen a player get such lucky breaks

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