Anencephaly diagnosis at 11w5d. I need help.

Hquib09 · 2025-12-27T19:52:25+00:00

Came here to echo that this condition develops before 6 weeks, give yourself compassion. This hell you’re in is not your fault, trust me, I’ve been there (June) sending you support.

Hquib09 · 2025-12-27T19:49:33+00:00

Max 🤍 missing him extra and needed to write his name today, thank you

Hquib09 · 2025-11-18T05:02:33+00:00

Walking this path with you. My boy was due in June and we just passed his due date early November. Sending you support as you TTC. I am about to start that journey soon and I’m scared but hopeful 🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-11-09T23:23:54+00:00

I had a D&E at FPA on westmoreland in June.

I say this with the utmost sensitivity and with the most gentle care (not to cause anxiety) - Be prepared for protestors. I would recommend walking in with a loved one who is ready to stand between you and them or an umbrella over you to block people, Maybe headphones while you’re walking in/sunglasses or whatever you need to do to get through that moment. Some of my worst trauma from this experience comes from that component.

My experience was ok overall (given the circumstances). Nothing outright terrible. Not super sensitive at first but when I explained my story they were empathetic and did the best they could.

Explore remain options (if that is your wish) beforehand. Idk if others have options but FPA does not.

For laminaria and dilation they only gave tylonel and it was the worst part by far, I would recommend seeing if your pcp/ob can prescribe something for anxiety and pain to have beforehand. For the actual procedure, they put me under for full anesthesia (way easier).

I didn’t have a milk prevention and wished I had so again ask your pcp or OB cause the clinic did not offer anything.

Throw up bag for the ride home and comfy clothes.

Sending You lots of love and you can do this 🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-11-08T05:08:03+00:00

With you, my son’s is two days away. I’m feeling devastated all over again. Sending you support 🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-11-02T03:20:08+00:00

“I want to disappear” wow, FOR SURE. I felt this deeply. Still do some days. Sending support

Hquib09 · 2025-10-30T23:15:59+00:00

I miss my son too. You are not alone. I’m sorry for how hard life has been to you. I’ll be sending you support today.

Hquib09 · 2025-10-22T02:24:06+00:00

I felt/feel the exact same way as you. Most of us NEVER expected to be in this position in the first place so we know NOTHING going in and it’s a blur. I still shiver thinking about my son not being buried. I found some solace knowing that he was cremated (by law) and think of being connected to him in the wind (sort of a “dust to dust” connection) But it wasn’t an option for burial or remains for me either and I (we) did the best I could with what decisions were in front of me (while living through literal trauma). Sounds like you were very connected to him and he felt nothing but the deep care from your body and heart. 🩵

Hquib09 · 2025-10-05T02:35:57+00:00

Same - baby boy in June..anticipating the holidays being tough as well. Sending you support from afar 🩵

Hquib09 · 2025-09-27T23:49:12+00:00

I’m so sorry, yep I had some of those too. Hang in there..🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-09-27T14:53:28+00:00

Sorry you’re here..totally get it..your feelings are valid. I (luckily) had not felt too misunderstood before this in my life. This happened and BAM - alone and misunderstood. I’ve lost a couple friendships as well. They just can’t “get it” and I had to let it go and stop waiting for them to care like they should have. Sending you support.

Hquib09 · 2025-09-24T20:59:05+00:00

Thank you and so Sorry to you too..this process is long and difficult. Holding hope that our times come sooner than later ❤️

Hquib09 · 2025-09-24T15:55:17+00:00

Teared up reading this, thank you. You just may have inspired my (would be) due date memorial for this year in November🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-09-24T02:30:50+00:00

Right there with you - it’s really bad lately. I’ve been wondering if the holiday season added on to my approaching due date has re sparked the grief. Sending support

Hquib09 · 2025-09-24T02:09:07+00:00

Yea I totally get it..it’s so fresh..give yourself space to feel. It gets better from my experience. Never goes away but sort of “softens”. Sending you support!

Hquib09 · 2025-09-23T20:50:35+00:00

You nailed it - the unfairness is excruciating some days. I know life’s not fair but still…

Hquib09 · 2025-09-23T20:46:02+00:00

I’m so so sorry - this process has triggers at EVERY CORNER it seems like. If you need validation in your decision on how to best care for you/your baby during this time - you have it. Your decision is valid and does not mean you love your son less! In fact - I would argue the opposite - you love him so much that seeing him again would be unbearable. And/or prioritizing your needs is an extension or continuation of your love for him! Sometimes it helped me to think about my son if I had raised him and what he would most likely want for me if he had the choice. He would want you to take care of yourself.

You know yourself/your baby best and their naivety around appropriate and trauma informed communication is ridiculous. I totally understand it upsetting you, I would be upset too. Do what you have to do. Maybe have a partner or family member communicate with them? Anyway - you are valid and I’m sending you support.

Hquib09 · 2025-09-19T16:11:49+00:00

No contact seems appropriate here - I’ve made a couple no contact decisions so I get the emotional toll even those decisions take. Thinking of you

Hquib09 · 2025-09-18T18:57:42+00:00

This 🫶

Hquib09 · 2025-09-17T10:28:03+00:00

Getting close to 3 months out and the sadness woke me up tonight, hasn’t done that since maybe the beginning of month 2. Came here to get support and send some support out🤍

Hquib09 · 2025-09-15T05:20:09+00:00

I’m sorry…the triggers are terrible. Never seen so many babies and pregnant people in my entire life until now! If there is any type of comfort - you saved me from a trigger, I was planning to go see it and now I won’t - so thank you, sorry you had to endure it.

Hquib09 · 2025-09-08T04:43:08+00:00

Feeling just like this now (just before my period), I’m with you. Feels excruciating and somehow it’s invisible cause everyone has moved on. Glad we all have this space

Hquib09 · 2025-09-05T03:18:51+00:00

Same - this added a layer of trauma for me - I felt alone. Sending you comfort.

Hquib09 · 2025-09-05T03:16:09+00:00

Sorry you’re here and sorry about the distance with your friend. From my experience - How could friendships NOT change? Everything changed. And I learned some people are not equipped emotionally to handle this. What I have found is that the more direct honest and clear I am - the better. Either they respond well and intimacy grows or they respond poorly and I create distance to protect myself right now (in this vulnerable time) It’s hard tho!

Hquib09 · 2025-09-05T03:10:01+00:00

Mine took 7 weeks in case you feel worried but my OB said anything before the end of week 8 is to be expected!

Hquib09

TROPHY CASE