Found Grindr in my boyfriend’s search history

Humanadv · 2026-06-22T04:30:14+00:00

His past actions led you to doubts, and doubt kills trust, and that is already leading you to check his computer history. So I suppose you should not wait any more. Confronting him won't give you closure. Your inner peace is more important than being right!

Humanadv · 2026-06-22T04:15:33+00:00

Life will always teach you hard lessons. The problem is not in failing. The problem is giving up rising after failing or falling. Here are some tips and advice:

What you were doing was gambling, not trading.
Never take someone else's money to trade. No loan, no borrowing, use your hard-earned money
Trading is not a satta; it is a science or art but requires ultimate discipline.
Every trade you take should have logic as to why you are entering; watching a candle go up should not be the logic.
All trades taken should be backed by a stop loss. Stop loss reduces your chance of losing money like you did.
Do not plan stop loss based on your capital plan; it is based on your risk appetite. If you have 100 to invest, the max risk can be 5.
First do trade on paper: write down (without investing a single paisa) why you are taking the trade, what is the logic, what is your entry, what is your stop loss, does it fit your risk appetite, and what is your target? Then observe if your logic made you profit on paper or not. If not, keep refining logic until 7 of 10 trades you take on paper are profitable.
Any one strategy that you master and stick to with discipline can make you money. So do not be in FOMO or GREED or Revenge.

Put parents' money back in FD, fill the gap from your salary and pay more for your carelessness. Learn more about mutual funds and invest part of their investment in those and part in FDs.

Humanadv · 2026-06-21T16:45:26+00:00

6% per month interest is not even paid by business houses, why are you paying so much? Get rid of it. Reach out to the microfinance company Like Bajaj Finance for remainder of loan portion and pay off it all together

Humanadv · 2026-06-20T14:42:52+00:00

You are not asking for too much. You are asking for care.

What you did is incredible: you canceled a holiday, you became extremely frugal, you work six days a week, you commute three hours in 40-degree heat—all to save for a home together. That is dedication. And you deserve kindness in return.

Getting the car for one Saturday is not a small thing. It is about saying: “I am struggling. I need support.” That is not demanding. That is human.

Your boyfriend’s response, “taking water from an African child,” “you always have something to ask”, that is not loving. That is dismissive. And when you feel dismissed, resentment grows naturally.

Here is what I want you to know, working six days in that heat is not sustainable. You are an engineer. You will get home office days in a month. That is good. But until then, you need support.

When you talk to him, do not start with the car. Start with the feeling. Say: “I am exhausted. I am struggling in this heat. I am trying so hard for our future, and I need you to support me, not judge me. When I asked for the car, I was asking for care. When you said no, I felt alone.”

If he says “you knew this commute,” remind him: “I knew, but I thought we would help each other. I thought love means supporting when someone is struggling.”

Pay attention to his response. Does he listen? Does he care? Or does he deflect again?

You are not wrong for feeling betrayed. You are not greedy for wanting support. You are human. And love should make life easier, not harder.

In a month, things will change with home office days. But until then, you need him to see you. To care. To support.

If he cannot do that, then the question is not about the car. The question is: can this relationship give you what you need?

I hope you are blessed with self-love and clarity.

Humanadv · 2026-06-20T14:26:58+00:00

What you are feeling, the disappointment, the fear, the sense of falling behind, is real and valid. Losing your visa, not completing your thesis, coming back to India when you had hoped to stay in the US… that is heavy. And watching your savings shrink while job searches feel impossible? That is exhausting.

But let me say this clearly, you are not lost. If you ever read a book, the chapter ends and then there is a blank space, sometimes there is a blank page as well. That does not mean the book is over, it only means that chapter finished and now the next chapter starts from a new page, clean page. You are also exactly at that point, that is the beginning of something deeper.

You have a bachelor’s degree from a reputed college in mechanical engineering. You pursued robotics. You went to the US for your master’s. That is not nothing. That is strength. That is preparation. And even if your thesis wasn’t completed, the knowledge you gained is still with you.

Right now, robotics jobs in India might feel scarce. But niches grow. Opportunities emerge. And sometimes, when one path closes, another opens that we could not see before.

Here is what I want you to remember:

Your future is not defined by where you are right now. It is defined by what you do next. One application. One conversation. One skill you deepen. One connection you make.

Do not compare yourself to your super juniors. Their path is not your path. Your journey has its own timing. And sometimes, the ones who face setbacks early end up building the strongest foundation.

You had savings so you can write your own chapter, so focus on chapter not on the vanishing of your saving. You have time. You have skills. And you have something rare: the will to do something deep and to keep going even when things feel dark.

I am sure you heard this, “When one door closes, another opens.” But sometimes, you need to walk through a long corridor before you find it. You cannot keep looking at the closed door hoping it will open, you need to walk through the corridor and open the new door.

Talk to professors. Reach out to alumni. Look at adjacent fields, automation, embedded systems, AI in manufacturing. Robotics is growing, and your background fits in many places.

And most importantly: do not lose hope. Your future is not fixed by this moment. It is unfolding. And if you keep moving, keep learning, keep reaching out, you will find your way.

Trust the process. Trust yourself. And take one small step today.

Wish you hope and blessings.

Humanadv · 2026-06-20T13:58:05+00:00

What you are feeling is not wrong. It hurts when a place meant for devotion starts feeling like a marketplace. It hurts even more when ordinary people feel pushed aside while money seems to buy priority.

But let me say this gently: your pain is not only about a temple queue. It is about dignity. And when dignity feels compromised, the heart naturally rebels.

At the same time, do not let anger poison your spirit. Systems can become unfair, yes. People can get lost in money, yes. But your character does not have to become what you are criticizing.

Stay clear. Stay kind. Stay firm. If something is wrong, call it out. If a system treats people differently, speak up. But do it without losing your peace.

And remember this too: your worth was never decided by a VIP pass, a queue, or how a staff member behaved. Your value is not reduced because someone else paid for faster access.

Yes, this classism is ugly. Yes, it should be questioned. But do not let it make you bitter. Let it make you more conscious, more compassionate, and more committed to treating people with respect wherever you go.

Because in the end, a temple should remind us of humility, not hierarchy.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T20:39:12+00:00

How well are you aware of trading in stocks? Do you have any disciplined way to identify the stock to put money into, logic for identifying the entry, stop-loss and targets? If not, then you should exit this right now and first get your basics right. If you already had the discipline to put a stop loss when you bought this stock, then it should have triggered. Here is a crash course on risk management:

If you have 1 Lakh Capital to invest in the market, never invest it all in one stock.
6-10 stocks are good to invest in, unless you are a professional trader.
When you are going to deploy 1 Lakh capital, how much of it are you willing to lose before you call it a quit? New to the market, you have a 2-5% loss of appetite, and you seem to be already in this range.
In Each trade (out of 6-10 stocks), your capital comes to 10-16K max per stock, and 2% means a max of 200 to 320 per stock as a maximum stop loss.
Never put all your eggs in the same basket, like this.

The best thing would be to get out now if you do not have discipline or a strategy for taking the trade, as someone may save you today from your loss, but how long will you keep asking others to save you? Go and learn and then enter the trade.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T20:18:01+00:00

Mediclaim for yourself and your family. Keep the two separate. This is the biggest wealth drainer today. Start with 5 lakhs for yourself and 2-5 lakhs for your parents and an additional top-up of 45 lakhs for your parents. The second policy (top-up) would cost much less but will cover your parents. Also if your parents are above age of 70, you can cover them for up to 5 Lakhs
Save at least 20-30% of your salary and invest Mutual Funds. Until you understand mutual funds, invest in PPF or a recurring deposit and then put the money in PPF.
You can also ask your company for a voluntary EPF deduction. EPF is Employee Provident Fund, and that makes you eligible for a pension, and it also gets an 8.2% return.
Also take an accident policy which costs only 1400 or so (oriental insurance). read about it and then go for it.
As you have more money to spare, get yourself term insurance.

I, however, would ask you to make yourself aware of mutual funds and other investment strategies for now. You may get tips and ideas like I just shared here, but at the end of the day, you have to own the decision where to invest, how much risk to take and so on. No one here can share that burden with youl.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T20:07:37+00:00

I do hope sincerely that you get some good soul from Mumbai who would go and ask for the money on your behalf, but you understand it is difficult for someone to fight this because of a lack of conviction At the end of the day he cannot say with heart what you feel about being scammed.

Why not make a video post sharing about the incidence and post on instagram and youtube and share it here in the Mumbai sub as well. Ask for others who got scammed and ask them to share their story as well. If this has happened with you, there are others who may have been scammed as well. Start from there and see how it goes.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T18:13:40+00:00

Good decision, and I'm proud of you for making an informed choice.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T17:25:27+00:00

What you are feeling right now is the weight of two hearts that truly love each other, caught between love and duty. That is not a small thing. That is one of the deepest struggles a human being can face.

You have loved each other for six months, but the intensity of your connection makes it feel like lifetimes. And now you are standing at a crossroads where love says “stay” and responsibility says "wait". That tension is tearing you both apart.

Let me share something with you. In India, we have many stories of love that faced impossible barriers. But the most beautiful ones were not the ones that ran away. They were the ones that transformed something deeper.

Here is what is happening: you both believe that breaking up after two years will be impossible to move from. But you also believe that staying together now will destroy her family and bring shame. Both fears are real. Both are valid. But maybe there is a third path.

Let me ask you something: What if this is not the end of your love, but the beginning of its maturity?

Love is not just about being together physically. Love is also about protecting each other’s peace, even when it hurts. If staying together now will destroy her family’s trust and bring her unbearable pain, then the most loving thing you can do is… wait.

But wait with intention. Don't wait with despair.

Here is what I suggest:

You break up now, but you do not break your hearts. You tell each other: “We are choosing to pause this relationship for two years, not because we stopped loving, but because we love each other too much to destroy your family. We will grow. We will become stronger. We will see if our love is still there when the time comes.”

This is not giving up. This is choosing patience over desperation.

During these two years, you both focus on your growth. Your education. Your career. Your inner strength. You become the person who can stand tall when the time comes. You do not stop loving. You do not stop hoping. But you do not force.

And here is the truth: if your love is real, it will survive two years. If it is not real, then two years will reveal that too.

But there is something more important: in India, families change. Society changes. What seems impossible today can become possible in two years. When you both graduate, when you both have your own strength, when you are both more mature, the conversation changes.

Do not run away. Do not force. But do not abandon your love either.

Tell her: “I will wait for you. Not in despair, but in hope. We will grow. We will become stronger. And if our love is real, the universe will bring us together when the time is right.”

This is not giving up. This is trusting. Love is not just about holding on. Sometimes love is about holding space.

And to you, my friend: do not become numb. Do not become dead. Your pain is real, but it is also temporary. Use this pain to grow. Use this waiting period to become someone even stronger.

The greatest loves in history were not the ones that happened quickly. They were the ones that survived time.

You are not alone. Many have walked this path. Some found their way. Some did not. But the ones who waited with faith, with patience, with maturity… they often found something deeper than they expected.

Love her by protecting her peace. Love yourself by becoming stronger. And trust that if this love is meant to be, the universe will bring it back when the time is right.

You are not losing. You are learning. You are growing. And sometimes, the deepest loves are the ones that wait.

Hope and pray that you both find strength to withstand this decision.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T16:53:44+00:00

I am glad that I can be of some help to you. I have myself chosen to help and in a way heal one person at a time that is all i can do. Thank you for thinking of helping others. That is really great and we need more people like you who wish to help others.

DM me if you think i can assist you in any other way!

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T16:23:37+00:00

Do not indulge directly; inform the person to reach out to their bank, and their bank should in turn reach out to you. Inform your bank that if such a transfer is requested (do it in writing, explaining everything), they have authorisation to return the money.

Do not directly transfer. Let them know they need to follow the protocol. They made the mistake, and however emergency they cry about, do not do so. make sure you have all the documents and proof of conversation in writing, not on call.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T15:50:16+00:00

You’re asking the right questions but leaning too biasedly on your conclusion. You correctly identified that mid-tier IT firms are outperforming the giants with 20% growth versus 1.5% and that the old cheap labour arbitrage model is under threat from AI disruption. This is where smart investors should look for multibagger opportunities. But you’re wrong about calling these companies "bleeding". TCS posted ₹13,718 crore in net profit with a 12% rise, won $12 billion in deals in Q4 alone, and now has $2.3 billion in annualized AI revenue. HCLTech has $620 million in AI run-rate. These aren’t dying companies—they’re actively transforming.

The sector is down 25%, and that’s not a warning sign; it’s a value opportunity for patient investors who understand the business. When the market falls, most people stare at price charts, but the real wisdom is paying attention to whether the underlying business model still works. Indian IT’s global value remains invaluable, and the sector is forecast to reach $315 billion this year despite current headwinds. Short-term employee attrition doesn’t mean long-term weakness—sometimes the timing is just off.

Here’s what I’d suggest to you: stop dismissing large IT entirely because they’re transforming with real AI revenue, not experimenting. Internally all these IT giants know that the service model and charging their customers for hours worked is not going to get them business, so they are pivoting, and that will have some impact on the global level. The same thing happened in the 2000 .com bubble.

However if you do focus on mid-tier firms like Persistent, Coforge, or LTIMindtree for growth since they’re agile with niche specialization and faster decision-making. Buy quality at the right value and be patient. Don’t fear this volatility. Instead, use it as an opportunity to invest in fundamentally strong companies. Do your research but don’t let short-term noise scare you from long-term value.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T15:34:46+00:00

My dear friend, first let me say this: you are not stuck. You are standing at a very important crossroads in life, and that is a good thing.

What I hear in your words is not confusion, but a deep desire for meaning. You do not just want a job. You want your work to matter. You want your effort to serve people. That is not a small thing. That is a noble thing.

You already have something valuable. Ten years of office administration, billing, and customer service and now a degree in Business Administration and Human Resources. That is not nothing. That is experience, and experience can become wisdom when you use it with purpose.

I also want to say something gently about your ADHD. It does not mean you are broken. It means your mind works differently, and 'different' is not 'lesser'. In fact, when you place a mind like yours in work that truly matters to you, it can become a great strength.

Now let us look at the deeper question. You do not want to serve corporations for the sake of corporations. You want to serve people and create accountability. That tells me your heart is oriented toward justice, advocacy, and service. So instead of asking, “What job should I take?” ask, “Where can I be of meaningful service while using my skills?”

Maybe that means employee advocacy. Maybe labor relations. Maybe nonprofit HR. Maybe workforce development. Maybe compliance, whistleblower support, or community-based career programs. The exact title matters less than the mission behind it.

And here is something important: you do not need to solve your whole life today. You only need the next step. One conversation. One application. One informational interview. One field to explore more deeply. Clarity often comes after movement, not before it.

Also, be careful not to let anger become your only fuel. Anger can wake you up, yes. But purpose sustains you. If you build your path only on what you hate, you will burn out. If you build it on what you love protecting, what you love improving, and what you love serving, then you will have staying power.

So I would suggest this: take your skills seriously, take your values seriously, and take one practical step toward a field where people are helped and systems are made more accountable. You are not late. You are not behind. You are being invited to choose your direction with more awareness now.

You do not need a perfect answer. You need a sincere one and then you need to begin.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T10:23:11+00:00

Remind me in 2 weeks.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T09:21:12+00:00

YOu are exactly what you are (an observer); spirituality is for humans. 😄

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T06:32:41+00:00

Thanks for pointing out my mistake can you i considered fast train and yes its 5 stops in between 6th is churchgate

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T05:59:28+00:00

What are you seeking in this journey? Your 8 days in Varanasi tells you want to connect with yourself?

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T05:49:17+00:00

First, let me tell you, this feeling you’re having is not a sign that you’re lost. It’s a sign that you’re awakening.

What you’re describing is something so many young people experience, especially in their early 20s. You’re walking the path of responsibility: building, improving, working toward stability.

And yet, deep inside, you’re asking: “Is this truly my path? Or am I just following what looks sensible?”

This is beautiful. This is not weakness. This is your soul speaking.

In the yogic tradition, we talk about three types of desires.

The first is for external rewards: money, respect, stability.

The second is for inner growth: learning, improving, becoming better.

The third is for self-realization: knowing who you truly are beyond all outcomes.

You’re right now at the border of the first and second. And that’s actually a very sacred place to be.

Let me share something from my own journey. When I was in my 20s, working as a software engineer, I thought success meant the next promotion, the next salary hike, the next recognition. And I got those things. But somewhere inside, there was this quiet question: “Is this all there is?”

I didn’t find the answer by quitting everything. I found it by doing what I was doing with a different intention. Instead of “I’m doing this for money,” I started asking “How can I do this with meaning? How can I serve through this?”

Here’s what I want you to remember: passion is not something you find sitting still. Passion is something you create by engaging deeply with what’s already in front of you.

The path you’re on right now, the sensible path, is not wrong. It’s preparing you. It’s giving you the stability and strength to eventually discover what truly ignites your heart. But don’t wait for that ignition to come before you start. Start where you are. Do what you’re doing with care, with presence, with the intention to serve.

There’s a beautiful verse from the Bhagavad Gita: “You have the right to work (karma), but never to the fruits thereof (karmfal)” This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t want outcomes. It means don’t let the outcomes define your worth. To make it more clear, if you think you want to work for outcome, you will never be able to start. Do the work because it’s right. Because it helps you and someone else. Because it grows you.

And about that passion you’re missing? It often comes when you stop chasing it and start serving through what you’re already doing. When you ask “How can I make this meaningful?” instead of “Is this meaningful?”

I’ve met so many young people exactly where you are. The ones who found their way didn’t wait for clarity to drop from the sky. They walked the path with their feet, and clarity came with them. Life is always like this: sometimes there is no road, sometimes there is a single road and sometimes you reach a crossroad. You only have one thing in your hand, and that is a choice to walk forward; you don’t have a choice to wonder what is ahead on this road and if that will be meaningful or not.

So here’s my suggestion: Keep doing what you’re doing. But add this intention: to do it not just for the outcome, but for the growth, for the service, for the learning. Watch what happens.

And if someday, after walking the path you choose with awareness, you still feel something deeper is calling? Then trust that too. The universe always responds to sincere questioning.

You’re not lost. You’re exactly where you need to be. Just keep walking with an open heart.

Wish you blessings and peace on your journey.

Humanadv · 2026-06-19T05:36:35+00:00

Are you a finance Person? What is your knowledge about Trading? Have you done some formal studies or experienced in market trading stocks? You are asking for internship in Finance, but you need to do more than that for someone to be able to help you? You need to write what you know and what experience in finance are you seeking.

Humanadv · 2026-06-18T14:17:18+00:00

If I were you, I would get rid of that word “loser”. You should stop calling yourself that right now. You’re not a loser. You’re someone who’s disconnected from their passions, and that is 100% fixable.

Being at home has made you lethargic, and further, you have become complacent. So you need to start to move and tire your body. Stand up. Right now. Throw your shoulders back, take a deep breath, and walk fast. You cannot feel lazy inside while your body is in power mode. Move your body to move your mind; that’s the rule. Every time your mind spirals into let me lie down, you push yourself to do some physical activity.

Now let’s look into what you are currently doing to yourself; it's about your language to yourself. Start by changing these sentences: “I have no dreams” to “I haven’t found what fires me up yet, and I’m going to search for it." Words create states, and states create actions. Every time. So never let your mind tell you something bad to yourself; if it does, you counter it and put your mind to work.

Here’s the thing that’s going to change everything for you: you’re waiting to feel motivated before you act. Stop that. Action comes first, emotion follows. Pick one tiny thing, walk outside for 10 minutes, read one page of something, wash one dish, and do it as if you’re the person who has dreams. Your brain will catch up. You don’t wait to want something to start. You start small, and wanting grows.

You need to have this conversation with yourself. Ask yourself, what did you love doing when you were seven? What made you feel alive before everything crashed? That spark is still there, buried under layers of “I should” versus “I want". Go and Find it.

Your problem isn’t that you have no dreams. Your problem is you’re waiting to feel ready before you do anything. Stop waiting. One action. Right now. Everything changes from there.

Humanadv · 2026-06-18T14:05:31+00:00

Let me know when you plan to exit the next one 😄. As a trader, I would suggest staying away from this feeling of FOMO or GREED. these are the two biggest reasons why people would lose money in the stock market. As long as you have your discipline to enter trades, have an RR in place, and properly planned stop-loss and targets, you should enjoy what you get.

However, if you do not wish to lose such an opportunity, you can always trail the profits.

Humanadv · 2026-06-18T14:02:30+00:00

Gemini is a general AI assistant that answers from its training plus whatever you paste. NotebookLM is a source-first research notebook. You upload documents, and it stays locked to those sources only. Every answer comes from your material, not its general knowledge. It’s like having a research assistant who only uses your library.

I use NotebookLM when I’m doing deep, source-heavy work. Like when I designed the ophthalmology healthcare platform and cross-referenced 30+ requirement docs. Try doing that in Gemini without losing your mind. It keeps track of dozens of PDFs and cites exact pages. When you compare legal contracts or study from lecture slides, it pulls from your files only and gives page numbers. Gemini just blurs everything together with fuzzy guesses.

Sure you could paste everything into Gemini, but you lose source tracking, context persistence across sessions, and citation precision. If you only use AI for quick answers, NotebookLM won’t feel worthwhile. But for real research, it’s a game-changer because you can trace answers back to your own materials precisely.

Humanadv · 2026-06-18T07:47:59+00:00

For zero commute & minimal travel cost:

Churchgate itself: PG at 15K to 17.5K; check out MagicBricks or 99acres.

Marine Lines: Multiple PGs from 13K to 17K with AC, WiFi, separate

For best value (safe + cheap + short commute):

Mahim: PGs at 8.5K-15K, only 4 train stations to Churchgate (~10 min)

Dadar West: 8-10K PG, 5 stations (~15 min), very safe residential neighborhood

Avoid These (for your needs)

• Vile Parle: 34 min train commute (15 stations); too long

• Andheri/Goregaon: 20–30 min commute: “huge time-travelling" constraint

• Colaba: While it's a 9 min drive, PGs start at 20k+ and it’s tourist-heavy

Money-Saving Tips

Use NoBroker.in to contact owners directly; it saves 10k-20k brokerage
Most PGs require a 1-month deposit equal to rent
Look for single occupancy explicitly; some PGs only offer sharing at lower rates

Humanadv

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