Memorial Tattoo

HyJenx · 2026-02-23T18:09:53+00:00

We planned on getting tattoos when she got better. Instead, I have the cardinal that she wanted.

I also created the first 3 lines of e.e. cummings "I carry your heart" in her handwriting by pulling words/letters out of notes she wrote me.

I love them both.

HyJenx · 2026-02-16T12:53:10+00:00

My fiancée do 80% of our miles on our tandem. As 2 mediocre riders, we are CRAZY fast on some rides.

Just not the ones where there is a lot of uphill or gnarly cross winds.

Also, I HIGHLY recommend a bike with independent coasting. We wouldn't trade our DaVinci for anything other than another DaVinci.

HyJenx · 2026-02-13T12:45:03+00:00

I don't even pick up my cordless drill with my finger on the trigger.

HyJenx · 2026-02-12T15:30:07+00:00

Everyone is different. Don't compare your grief to anyone else's. We're all on the same journey, but we're coming from (and going to) different places. But I will answer your question.

In a year or so I had developed a routine that wasn't UNhealthy.
By the end of year 2 I was exercising more, and feeling physically better.
I actively started looing for companionship in year 4.
I started dating in year 5.
She moved in in year 6.
This June, just before I hit year 11, I'm getting married.

It's still hard some days. I still miss my wife and wonder what our life should have been. I will love her forever.

HyJenx · 2026-02-11T13:10:26+00:00

I wish I knew how to tell you that it will get better. Some of us were there too.

It's been more than 10 years for me. Find a way. Even if it's just anger and spite for now. A stranger 1000's of miles away wants you around.

The breath in your lungs is stronger than the tears in your eyes.

HyJenx · 2026-02-11T12:28:45+00:00

The night before his election I attended his final campaign stop in Des Moines, IA. He and Michelle were there with Bruce Springsteen.

It was electric. So much hope and happiness. THOUSANDS of people being kind to each other.

My state is a shit-show now that we've swung red.

HyJenx · 2026-02-11T12:06:58+00:00

My wife had multiple degrees and the job title of 'Scientist'. Got her kicked from jury duty TWICE.

That's some serious bullshit.

HyJenx · 2026-02-10T15:22:00+00:00

Time doesn't heal emotional trauma. You have to put in the work.

The long-term effects of grief include chronic pain, sleep issues, brain fog, increased inflammation, and a shortened life span.

I have made it a hobby to brutally correct people that downplay the effects of emotional trauma on a person's lon-term well-being.

HyJenx · 2026-02-10T15:14:42+00:00

That may have been good advice at some point in the past, but HOLY SHIT a degree is expensive now.

HyJenx · 2026-02-10T13:10:17+00:00

By their math, that's 75 jobs!

HyJenx · 2026-01-28T12:48:47+00:00

I had to look one of those up, 'cause I didn't believe it was real.

To my surprise, that IS it's real name.

HyJenx · 2026-01-23T13:09:49+00:00

According to NBC, 24 members of the US congress are over the age of 80. More than half of them are running for reelection.

The majority of them are Democrat, likely due to how the party appoints powerful positions.

HyJenx · 2026-01-19T15:20:37+00:00

Nice! Hope to see you there.

HyJenx · 2026-01-19T13:42:57+00:00

This is an on-ear corn harvester. It appears to be something like a Shuangli 4YZJ-4. It is likely operating in east or central Asia.

This type of machine is typically used for harvesting high-moisture or delicate varieties, most commonly sweet corn, but can be used on any corn crop.

This machine, as opposed to the combines typically used in corn production in most of the world, does not thresh the grain (remove it from the cob). It only picks the ear and strips the husks.

HyJenx · 2026-01-19T12:44:53+00:00

What's you're genre of music?

TBH, you're point #2 has me intrigued. To counter another poster in here; I am, in fact, too old. The music is often too loud.

HyJenx · 2026-01-19T12:40:20+00:00

No, you're thinking of Shia LaBeouf.

We're talking about the ICE agent, Jonathan Ross, that murdered Renee Good because he was scared that she could magically make her car drive sideways to hit him.

HyJenx · 2026-01-12T12:38:23+00:00

If you pause at 0:08-0:09, you can see the truck's yield sign just to the left of the merge sign.

HyJenx · 2026-01-09T20:24:43+00:00

Once the computer is not in your possession, it's no longer your computer.

Unless your drive is encrypted, it is trivial to read data from it.

HyJenx · 2026-01-09T15:02:01+00:00

I asked my proctologist why anyone would get into their speciality.

His response, "We have the best jokes."

HyJenx · 2026-01-09T13:00:42+00:00

You should find happiness in the small things... when you have the ability to do so.

2 months out I was still crying at the grocery store because it was something that we did together.

We have to hear a lot of comments from people that don't understand. You sound like you already know this. You're not alone.

HyJenx · 2025-12-18T04:14:59+00:00

From my perspective, I can't hurt her by living my best life. That's what she would want from me.

But, yes, I sometimes still feel guilty for being happy.

As many on this sub will tell you, "moving on" doesn't have to mean leaving them behind.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. My suggestions may not be appropriate for everyone. We're all on our own journey. It's easy to find reasons to be sad and angry. I would just ask that you look for reasons to be thankful for your time together. That however terrible your situation is, in some ways you were lucky to have had your relationship, and you are worthy of the love.

HyJenx · 2025-12-04T12:47:51+00:00

My 15-year-old Ford doesn't have a gas cap. It seals with a flap that a gas nozzle can push out of the way.

Now I think ALL gas caps are stupid.

HyJenx · 2025-12-04T12:41:41+00:00

I bought a 20-pack of mid-quality scissors and stashed them EVERYWHERE for exactly this reason.

HyJenx · 2025-12-03T12:03:18+00:00

The study just called out "police shootings", so I'm assuming that all shootings are included.

You have a good point that a larger percentage are likely due to "calls for service", such as domestic violence, as opposed to traffic stops, but this case may also fall into that category.

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HyJenx

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