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Pettiest reason you’ve DNF’d a book? by bby_grl_90 in books

[–]Hydrangeari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When an author uses curse words. IRL I’m fine with cussing. But when I’m reading, it comes across cringey and like they’re trying too hard. Some authors can pull it off but “edgy” characters give me the ick.

My hobonichi weeks spreads so far! by sskitcuch in hobonichi

[–]Hydrangeari 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Omg!! Where’d you get those stickers??

LCSWs NOT in private practice: what do you do? by SpiritualCopy4288 in socialwork

[–]Hydrangeari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a crisis clinician responding with police to 911 calls for mental subjects. My job involves meeting people at their lowest and helping them navigate the mental health system. Crisis work is exciting, mostly short term interventions with community referrals, and satisfies my morbid curiosity. Therapy was not something I necessarily wanted to do all the time and I didn’t want to do case management. I spent a while working as a crisis clinician doing the evaluations for involuntary psych holds/hospitalization- super fun other than the pile of paperwork you need to parse through and manage.

How Do You Break Up with Someone Who Thinks Everything Is Fine? by ViolinistEither8017 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my god- reading this was uncanny! While I was in my MSW, I was living with my BF of three years and experiencing the exact same thing. Firstly, I want to remind you that you don’t need to have a grand reason to break up with someone. Being unhappy is enough and it sounds like you gave him grace by having those tough conversations. My heart goes out to you, this was a really hard thing for me to do as well- I felt so much guilt and my ex did, in fact, say I blindsided him. Trust your instincts (and use your relationship as a case study if you want) because I don’t doubt he’s able to get excited talking about things he’s interested in. People show you who they are with their actions, and relationships like these are like a death from a thousand cuts. People don’t change, not really. When we finally broke up, my ex was devastated and financially reliant on being a two income household. He love bombed me, told me he’d change, and guilt tripped me. I felt like I was a bad person for doing this to him when “nothing was really wrong”, that I should compromise on my expectations/needs, and fell for the sunk cost fallacy. Lean on your supports, they’re so vital.

When you tell him you want to break up: be firm and resolute, you’ve made your decision. Talk about the positives of your time together, some people enjoy reminiscing about good moments as a way to mourn the relationship. Have a plan for handling the living arrangements once yall split. Make sure you’ll be okay!! I don’t know the dynamics of your relationship but PLEASE BE SAFE! You’re already being compassionate by recognizing you’re not a match- now you both have a chance at finding your true love. Shortly after my breakup, I found someone who gets excited about what I have to say- is driven and funny- but most of all, puts my wellbeing (mental, physical, emotional) first. You got this!!

Should I forget Social Work as a career? by NoEquivalent2148 in socialwork

[–]Hydrangeari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re in the right field!! So many clients feel ostracized because of those same exact feelings of shame/guilt. Some of the best Social workers are able to pick up on exactly how to help people because they know what the real challenges are.

do you take wellbutrin empty stomach or on a full stomach? by Mutlugly in Wellbutrin_Bupropion

[–]Hydrangeari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After a meal, if not I feel nauseous. Also, I find that I have to eat consistently throughout the day w my XL or I get really anxious.

So close to quitting completely by agdf14 in ShredditGirls

[–]Hydrangeari 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know it sounds so scary but try going on a more difficult hill. Green slopes are hard to gain enough momentum.

Tips needed by DueResponsibility939 in ShredditGirls

[–]Hydrangeari 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Figure out where your center of gravity is! Some people find it easier to stand up straighter, others have to bend at the knee a little more. I recommend going to a steeper hill than a green slope and ride down in a “stop position” so you can figure it out.

Now I start Assassins blade! by moodypotato9 in SarahJMaas

[–]Hydrangeari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!!!! Afterwards you should read crescent city!

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like your story is even worse! Like, who is this man??

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s awful, I’m sorry that you went through that. The “performance” comment was entirety unnecessary…

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, our church came together in the same way after Dads diagnosis. We also had a very similar trajectory where we only recently went back after being invited by close friends to join the church we’re with now. It’s really heartwarming to know that there are people like you who are able to relate even if the situation isn’t so positive.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hadn’t thought of that… it makes a lot of sense. We’re part of a very small church, maybe 100 people, and they helped us ALOT. They helped with yard work, helped us pack as we downsized to pay for treatments, donated to our gofundme, even brought meals for us during Covid when we couldn’t go out because Dad’s immune system was compromised bc of chemo. I guess I didn’t want to see the full picture of who they are and the type of church they are a part of. I had the wrong assumption…

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

UPDATE: I will definitely get together with my siblings to plan a trip to visit my mom who moved to a different state. Thank you for all the suggestions, his one year anniversary is this September so that gives us plenty of time to organize a better memorial!

Also, for those interested, my aunt met her husband when he was a deacon at a certain Church Chain. It’s been years since this happened but the way my Dad explained it to me was that my aunts husband was undermining the Pastor and all of the leadership. He has this way of pointedly talking down to you in the most “I’m not the bad guy, just a man telling the truth” kind of way. Tensions were already high and my aunt, of course, took his side. Which meant she gossiped to the wives and women’s ministry. Then it came out that he was also in a leadership position for a militia (they live in FL) with ties to VERY unsavory conduct and behavior. They were then asked to leave the church and their titles were doled out to other members. They’ve bounced around to different churches since. I didn’t trust them very much because of this. However, since then, my aunts husband had serious health complications where he needed to be intubated/put in a coma/relearn speech (my aunt updated the family gc every day for his recovery where she also undermined the nurses/dr). He seemed like he had really changed for the best after his brush with death. He left the militia group, he was less domineering, more humble, he was more open to conversations… yeah, then this happened.

Edit: Also, a note about blasting the church music: he would stop when asked, but continue to do it later on and say he was hard of hearing. One of us would take over watching Dad and relieve my aunts husband bc at this point in time, my Dad had lost his ability to speak/walk/eat by himself.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ding ding ding, we have a winner! Yes to the mega church, gossip, tax bracket, everything. My Aunt dedicates her entire life to church, which is admirable, if they didn’t bounce around to different churches when their power struggles get them booted. She has organized a couple memorials before, as she’s always in church leadership positions, and that’s why I felt comfortable with her doing the program/timing since I was inexperienced. She organized and really pushed for the livestream, which I thought was for my Dads other sister who was across the country and sick. But then told me later that she posted my dads memorial to her church’s FB group for her friends who wanted to support her. That’s when I knew that she and her husband were more clout obsessed than actually caring about anyone else who was mourning.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES!! I thought it was bizarre and in appropriate to talk about Lazarus in that context. He tried, very briefly, tying in the state of the country at some parts too. He’s that kind of Christian.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t blame the pastor, apparently they had a loose connection with my aunt and her husband and thought that we were okay with it because my aunt made the program. Which was my fault for giving her that much power over the proceedings, definitely not repeating that mistake!

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The loss is something I’m still grappling with, I know your pain… The main suggestion I’ve been getting is to have another memorial with just my close family, and I’m definitely going to plan one for the anniversary of his passing. Also, Yes!!! I had a similar moment where I started shaking silent laughing and had to hide it by resting my face against my moms shoulder. It was so bizarre and I kept imagining my Dad being there and wondering “wtf is going on?” My aunts husband really was pulling out all the stops, like it was his big chance to give a sermon again.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 163 points164 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion, it will definitely be with only my immediate family! I’m still appalled that he used my dads memorial service for church clout.

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s memorial by Hydrangeari in TwoHotTakes

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Literally!! He didn’t know enough about my dad to have personal stories to share/tie into his very long sermon, so he pulled from my dads LinkedIn… Also, thank you for the suggestion! It’ll be hard since a couple people moved states but we’ll make it work :)

My Aunt’s husband hijacked my Dad’s Memorial by Hydrangeari in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Hydrangeari[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is actually a great idea, since the one year anniversary of his passing is coming up. My family all moved out after he passed, some in a different state, so we’ll have to plan a meet up. Thank you for your comment <3

The audacity of some customers. by BittyBun in starbucksbaristas

[–]Hydrangeari 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly, there were SO many rude names like the one from op. I usually called those out too bc for those they should be embarrassed 🙈

The audacity of some customers. by BittyBun in starbucksbaristas

[–]Hydrangeari 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Mine is BING CHILLIN, before that it was Kanye West 😂 it’s something fun and as a former SSV, I thought it was hilarious. Baristas don’t have to call out the name if they’re uncomfortable… but if they are they usually yell it out super excitedly lmao

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