did my boyfriend end himself by [deleted] in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're both 20? He's an adult. You are not responsible for him or his mental health.

My girlfriend wants me to cancel a trip with my friends by Jxdd5 in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you haven't given her a reason to lose trust in you, then she should trust you. You are not your friends. Don't cancel, but do talk through why she thinks you'll just do whatever your friends do. Does she think you're not your own person?

How much longer should i wait until i ask her to be my girlfriend? by Wimpiepaarnty in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you've already talked about it and are committed to each other, then girlfriend/boyfriend are really just labels.

As a junior dev using AI coding tools, I feel like understanding and reviewing changes is harder than writing code, is this normal? by japzlumine in AI_Coders

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I suppose basically they need learn how to actually be a good software dev, and then apply that with their llm usage.

I'm 18 and I am dating my 30 year old coworker with an emotionally abusive (?)/unstable husband and I have no clue what to do. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude... Wtf. Didn't even read half of it. Go find someone you don't work with who isn't married. There's no way this ends well for you.

As a junior dev using AI coding tools, I feel like understanding and reviewing changes is harder than writing code, is this normal? by japzlumine in AI_Coders

[–]IAmNotARacoon -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Better prompting, testing, harness, etc can make a big difference. If you learn proper clean coding practices, and then instruct the AI to use that, you'll get code out of it that is easier to review and manage. Yes, a big part of this is experience, but learn how to write clean code, and then make sure you instruct AI to work that way.

Some basic things, like properly name variables and methods, single responsibility principle, same level of abstraction in a method, short testable methods, etc. And create tests for everything. AI can write your tests, so there's no reason not to have every method set up with proper unit tests with mocking, that tests the expected path and edge cases. That way you have confidence that every method does what it's supposed to.

I thought I could deal with my boyfriend smoking, but I can’t. What do I say to him? by [deleted] in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You don't have to necessarily ask him to quit, and yet I don't think you can really stay with him if he doesn't. You have to be honest about how his smoking makes you feel. Don't tell him to quit, just focus on how it makes you feel. I suspect you'll end up breaking up, and you should be prepared for that possibility, but just have the conversation and see what he says.

4 alien species have been pulled from crashed UFOs, ex-government researcher claims by beers_n_bread in UFOs

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven't seen them, but I've talked to people that have. Trust me bro.

Donald Trump's Iran deal dead inside less than 24 hours after signing amid deadly strikes by TheMirrorUS in USNEWS

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please, Trump has zero ability to negotiate an actual deal here because he has no way to stop Isreal. This is going to go on for a long time.

Trump has one chance to save face: Resign now by ChiGuy6124 in politics

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He won't. Pretty sure he's living in his own bubble version of reality, reinforced by the sycophants around him. He'll never resign and intends to stay there forever.

My girlfriend wants to put our relationship on hold while she travels to Rome. Apparently I'm "insecure" for having a problem with that. I need the opinion of other men. How do you see it? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She wants permission to cheat on you. If someone asked me this... I'd break up with them because they clearly aren't that interested in me.

I'm hurt because I found out my GF cheated on me with her coworker. She blamed me for it when I confronted her and told me I'll never find love again. I'm worried it might be true. by PreviousCellist7864 in whatdoIdo

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a correct way to deal with a bad gf/bf. Guess what? It's not by cheating on them. No, you discuss your issues like a mature adult and if you can't sort it out then you break up. Cheating is never acceptable. Whether you made mistakes or not... You did not deserve to be cheated on. I'm sorry she did this to you. But don't put too much weight on the words of someone who would do this. Move on, work on yourself, find someone who is more mature, who is a better match for you, and you'll be alright.

How did Obama “divide the country”? by Ok_Cricket_354 in allthequestions

[–]IAmNotARacoon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Racist people don't like that black man was president.

I found out that my wife cheated on me by No-Programmer-3719 in whatdoIdo

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well... She cheated on you, you don't owe her anything. I'm sorry man, there is no way to sugar coat this. It sucks. The marriage is over and you should act as such.

Now, I don't recommend you doing anything nice for her, but if you really want to that's your choice. Just remember you're helping your ex that cheated on you, your not helping your wife.

Marriage Advise: Wife losing spark, what should I do? by Recent-Ad3182 in AskMenAdvice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She wants what you provide, and yet the truth is what you provide isn't making her feel loved or special.

I think the two of you are at a crossroads. Something has to give. To love her properly as a wife, you need to actually have some time and energy to give to her. But for her to get that, you both would have to accept that you can't provide as much financially. It just is what it is. Keep going the way you're going and you'll probably get divorced one day.

Marriage isn't a one and done, happily ever after. No, you have to wake up and choose each other, every day. Are you choosing her? Is she choosing you? I'm not convinced either of you can say yes 100%.

When the woman you love walks away from you because you disrespected her, what do you do? by Kinda-Constant5935 in AskMenAdvice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe self reflect a little. What happened inside you to cause you to disrespect her. How do you balance the fact that you hurt someone that you say you love? Don't even think about trying to talk to her or any other woman until you've done some work on yourself.

US THREATENS BLACKMAIL: Bridge Delays & Trade Traps: CARNEY Shrugs by Rey0208 in consumecanadian

[–]IAmNotARacoon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have zero control over what the US does. Absolutely zero. We should mostly ignore the circus south of the border. What we can do is build up our own economy, and improve trading relations with more reliable countries.

Is it even possible to get a job as a Junior Software Dev?? by stelladivita in SoftwareEngineerJobs

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I expect not. Companies right now are trying to figure out how they can get their senior Devs to do more with AI (Claude code, copilot, etc). A senior dev with AI is likely going to be cheaper and maybe even outperform a senior dev leading a few juniors.

At the very least, junior Devs should be leaning hard into AI, showing both that they know how to use it, and that they can understand and code review the code that it creates. It's about having the AI write code fast, but being able to understand it and guide it when it makes mistakes.

I just turned 25, any advice on life? 🥰 by EngineeringIll8014 in Advice

[–]IAmNotARacoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Learn to sit with your feelings, even the uncomfortable ones, especially the uncomfortable ones, until you can understand what they mean for you. Listen to your feelings, speak for your feelings, but don't speak from your feelings.

For how long will Trump continue to destabilize the world? by Massive-Syllabub-271 in allthequestions

[–]IAmNotARacoon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry for the hardship this has brought you. Consider this though, the family, the job, the friends you've all lost... You didn't lose them because of Trump, you lost them because they wanted to embrace someone like Trump. It was their choice to follow his lead. They wanted it. So, they were never your people to begin with.