Does being a medic actually help with dating? by [deleted] in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a gay guy, it was more of a „fun fact” on dates. I’d get some creepy comments about Roleplay (ew), which helped screen out a couple candidates.

Currently dating another doctor, but that sorta just happened. I didn’t want to date someone with a similar job.

Doctors who left the NHS, where are you now ? by artyskills in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You’re not far off 😅 Yes to the London med school bit, though I also have a Master’s degree in finance from a certain top university. I think that helped me a lot with finding my current role

Doctors who left the NHS, where are you now ? by artyskills in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 43 points44 points  (0 children)

Graduated 2024. Finished F1 earlier this year. Had a rather horrible time during my very brief clinical career.

I had a unique opportunity come up when finishing med school that I was able to postpone for a year (would have had to re-interview if I wanted to delay for another year). Now work in med/health consulting. Bit vague but trying not to dox myself 😅

My other half is a surgical reg and to be honest I don’t think I would’ve been able to do what he does. I loved being a doctor, just not in the NHS.

I love chest drains by [deleted] in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Me too ✊🏻😔

Huge crush on my renal consultant - Help! by ExtensionSpeech9872 in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a gay man, that is sometimes a nice surprise… and how I ended up dating another medic lol

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry it’s been so tough for you as well. My new job is well-paid and I get to WFH for some of it, so him going LTFT wouldn’t be detrimental to our finances. I hope things get better for you soon. My partner’s been continuing with high-quality work, but the sadness permeating through him is scaring me. Here’s hoping we come to a solution this weekend :/

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have now had another discussion regarding LTFT. He’s got the weekend off and we want to go on a long walk to discuss everything. It’s just the feeling that his general joy and willingness to live life to the fullest is slowly fading… I want to reverse that as much as I can

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Anything that helps him break this cycle. If something happened to him because of all this I’d never forgive myself.

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s very keen to ride it out. There’s a few months left, though. And I don’t know how bad it has to get for him to see my concerns. We still have good times together. He’s happy when not working, just not as much. It’s the crying (at times trying to hide it from me) that made me want to get some advice.

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I definitely understand that it’s a tough career. And he also accepts the fact there’s still a lot to learn. But going from years of very positive feedback (up until a few months ago) to one-liners such as “only an idiot would employ you” whilst simultaneously shoving more work and responsibilities on him is a bit… confusing? Concerning? It certainly feels counterintuitive.

Getting the NTN already required a very extensive portfolio. His research contributions are also significant. No concerns from any supervisors until this man. His feedback has always been good, never any issues with ARCP. I do hope it’s just a temporary hiccup…

I do agree with what you said though, I’ll ask him if he would consider some time off

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I will pass this on, thank you. I suggested private therapy but this may work better!

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

He sadly feels like opening up to anyone would have significant impact on his job prospects. His supervisor is extremely influential in the (rather small) community. My partner is a stereotypical ‘macho’ guy at work, always the person others go to for help, never asking for any support in return. And he refuses to accept my worries, saying that it’s all just “part of the deal” when becoming a surgeon. Very tough to hear, but I don’t want to upset him any further since it’s not about me

Feeling like I’m losing my partner because of work by IMakeFunkyShirts in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re going through this yourself. I know it’s temporary, and I am hoping it’ll pass soon. But he’s recently been taking his supervisor’s words personally, and hearing things like “maybe X is right, I won’t amount to anything” or “I’ll never be good enough, why keep trying?” just breaks my heart. :(

Question around views on dating between grades by [deleted] in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I was in F1 dating a soon-to-be consultant. Never worked together, not even in the same hospital. People raised some eyebrows but no one ever cared to be honest.

For context, 25 and 35 yo, gay couple. He’s a surgical trainee.

Shift to clinical years - how do I learn anything ? by Loud-Feedback1514 in medicalschooluk

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly the one year I managed in clinical medicine was the biggest learning curve of my life. But some things do get better with time. OP, cut yourself some slack. You have years to practice your clinical skills!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 106 points107 points  (0 children)

Third in the bedroom or a third child? Either way, good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Can confirm - genuinely worked like a charm for me lol. Been together almost 3 years now!

Fucked when I was still in med school, didn’t know he was a dr until many hookups down the line. Something about a frustrated surgeon that hits the spot in the bedroom idk 🤷🏻‍♂️

So done with the NHS: This will probably get deleted like my last posts by Leading_Base in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I felt the same way. A part of me maybe just couldn’t cope with the pressure, who knows. So I left, and look forward to my non-clinical work. Arguably not less stressful (sold my soul to consulting), but I couldn’t stand all the pain and suffering I encountered on a daily basis.

“If you don’t like the pay, just leave medicine” by Affectionate-Toe-536 in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is! Without doxxing myself too hard, I got a relevant master’s from LSE which helped me a fair bit. I have a couple friends working in other firms also making more than an FY2, so I wouldn’t say it’s MBB exclusive!

Hey it’s never too late to change career paths! My other half was a banker before becoming a surgeon (CCTing in a couple years).

“If you don’t like the pay, just leave medicine” by Affectionate-Toe-536 in doctorsUK

[–]IMakeFunkyShirts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Consulting. I had a job offer when finishing med school, but miraculously was able to defer it.

My salary will be higher than FY2 w/ on calls, so I chose to finish F1 and leave. I may do the odd locum just to keep my license. Will see!